U.K. School Incident - how serious is this?

[vmikelash]

@freddie11 My (sincere, not even remotely exaggerated, honest-to-Jesus-for-real…seriously) advice is to file a police report for assault.

Schools won’t or sometimes don’t have the ability to take these things as seriously as they should be taken, in terms of repercussions.

And I am of the firm opinion that assault is assault, whether they’re teens or adults. This kid is 13, and this was not a fight over a video game or a disagreement in the playground. This was an malicious, deliberate, unprovoked, targeted, sustained attack that led to a mass-bullying event.

This is as bad as the worst bullying / assault incident I have ever had happen in my years working with students.

Your child deserves to know that what happened to them WAS assault. And it SHOULD be taken seriously. And they SHOULD NOT have to come to school every day feeling unsafe.

What is more, while the school may not have many options in terms of consequences for the aggressor, they are CERTAINLY responsible for the teacher being out of the room.

Do I think it’s awful that teachers can’t fucking go to the damn bathroom because it puts kids at risk of bullying? Yes. But worst case they can phone the office or have a peer watch the class.

The teacher is legally responsible for supervising students during class hours. And they were gone long enough for this to turn into a whole taunting, chanting mess. What if there had been a fire? A lockdown? A medical emergency (which there very well could have been the way you describe your child being yanked about)?

 

[katrina2017]

@vmikelash I agree here. I would consider going to the police and even file a report on the school because so many kids laughed at what he did and the staff are not doing what they’re supposed to.

 

[vmikelash]

@katrina2017 That’s overkill… unless the school shows egregious error in handling it later.

Just make sure all of the info about the school and when the teacher was there / not there is present in the report filed against the aggressor. For now. So no one can go and. Change their story later.

 

[fuegoviva]

@freddie11 I went to a “top” mixed sex independent school (just mentioning this because I know there is a great variety of quality in the private sector). This would have got a suspension in my day but definitely not expulsion. Expulsion was reserved for a child who demonstrated a pattern of behaviour that didn’t respond to intervention. I think it’s a reasonable approach for the school to identify bad behaviour and at least attempt to address it before expulsion.

Bear in mind we don’t know what has happened to this child. Perhaps a favourite relative died the day before, perhaps they have mental health problems. This is something that the school and family will need to work through. The kids I knew that were violent were usually lashing out for a reason.

If you are unhappy with the schools response then it seems reasonable to withdraw your child from the school. It’s the only thing you have control over.

I hope your son is recovering well. This must have been very upsetting.

 

[emmanuel2016]

@freddie11 Not in the UK, but I’d expect a suspension and, if you and your son requested it, having class schedules switched up so that your son doesn’t have to be in class with the bully anymore.

 

[gert]

@freddie11 Well that's assault, so..

 

[peccavi44]

@freddie11 I would file a report with the police for assault and have the police deal with the kid’s parents.

 

[freddie11]

@peccavi44 I asked the teachers are they calling the police…….they couldn’t answer me and said when will collect statements first and see

 

[genx80s]

@freddie11 You’re the parent. You call the police. They can choose to or not. You can do the same.

 

[queenmommy]

@freddie11 You have to do it. The teachers aren't going to.

 

[foreverandaday]

@freddie11 They have no need to collect statements before calling the police. You're being fobbed off.

 

[whiteflight99]

@freddie11 I would expect a suspension, at the least.

 

[poetry360]

@freddie11 I’m sorry this happened.

You need to escalate the situation. Emails to the head, head of year, etc. Make a report to the police. Make it clear that you are not going away or dropping this.

Your post history suggests your son has been bullied for a while and it seems that the bullies are escalating in their behaviour - the response needs to match this.

If you don’t kick up a fuss there is a good chance they will try to ignore it. Consider contacting their school counsellor/equivalent to help your son deal with this emotionally. Good luck.

 

[katrina2017]

@poetry360 I agree. It might be time to bring your kid to some karate classes to learn self defense. In case anyone physically attacks him, he can defend himself

 

[binks17]

@freddie11 Assault and obvious bullying which should be dealt with but i dont see this being something that would lead to expulsion. Perhaps depends on your area though sadly.

 

[freddie11]

@binks17 But if I was in your workplace and held you by the collar and picked you up and throw you across the office. You wouldn’t expect me to get sacked.?

 

[binks17]

@freddie11 Of course. Just like i would expect assault in school to end in at least a suspension. Again it depends on your area/school. My niece was beaten, threatened with a knife and police were involved. The school did nothing. Not right or fair.

 

[bechristianlady]

@freddie11 Children are entitled to education. You are not entitled to a job.

Schools will do everything they can these days to avoid expelling a pupil because it doesn’t solve the problem. They just go to another school and do the same.

 

[freddie11]

@bechristianlady What if it’s a paying school ? Either that child goes, or I’ll take mine out.

 

[bechristianlady]

@freddie11 Depends who’s parents are more important to them quite frankly.