Q+A Part 1: The Basics

[joanah]

@bernard222

1. He’s 23, and I’ll be 23 on Monday.
2. This December will mark 8 years together total, and 2 years married!
3. I’m a middle school social studies teacher, and DH is an A&P (aircraft mechanic).
4. Before TTC our career plans are essentially the current status quo. But after TTC, DH is hoping to take over the small business he works at with his coworker sometime in the next several years, and eventually I hope to move to a district level position like curriculum and instruction.
5. We currently live in a city, and we hope to move back to our rural hometown about 30 minutes away from where we live now before TTC. We currently live in a 2 bed/2 bath condo, and want to build a bigger house in our hometown.
6. DH and I are both from middle class families. He’s German and Italian, and I’m Irish and a lot of other things, but we don’t have any big cultural traditions or anything.
7. DH was raised in a Lutheran church, I wasn’t raised in any specific religion. We think we want to establish ourselves in a church and have our children attend for a while just because we think the morals one can learn as a Christian are worthwhile. However, I identify as a Unitarian and he is a Christian but is very open-minded about things. We’re open to whatever religion our future children are interested in exploring as they get old enough to make their own decisions.

 

[vasukinv]

@bernard222 How old are you and your SO? I'm 22 very soon and my SO is 21, turning 22 in April next year.

How long have you and SO been together? 7 years this janurary.

What is your relationship status and do you plan to change your status before TTC? We're engaged since this summer. We do not plan on getting married before TTC

What do you and SO do for a living currently? I'm studying in nursing school on my third year, and my SO is studing economics on his third year. I have a job at a nursing home in my spare time, and my SO has a job as a student counselor and also works in an economics department in a major company in our country.

What are your career plans before and after TTC? I will be done as a registered nurse before giving birth. SO will be taking a master's in economics after his bachelor. I hope to be able to work part time.

Where do you live and what are your living arrangements like? Do you plan on moving? We live in a small apartment with only 1 bedroom. We plan on moving before summer 2018 to a bigger apartment.

What's your cultural backgrounds? Any cultural traditions you plan on passing down to your LO's? We're both Danish.

What's your religious backgrounds? Do you plan on raising your kids with the same views? We're both very atheist and plan on raising our kids this way, too.

 

[britebore]

@bernard222 Oh yay! Splitting it into parts was so smart!

1. I'm 20 and my husband is 25.
2. We've been together for almost four years and married for about five months.
3. My husband is a software engineer. I'm currently a stay at home wife.
4. My husband plans to continue with his current job for the foreseeable future. I plan on working on my writing. Once we have babies I'll be a SAHM and hopefully continue with my writing (and in a dream world get published!)
5. We just bought a house! It's right near a really good home school co-op and in a family friendly neighborhood. I already have the nursery all planed out in my head!

That being said, our overall living situation is a little unusual to some. My parents and brother live with us. It started when my mom had cancer so we rented a house with them so I could help take care of her. We all function really well together and don't get on each other's nerves so we've just continued doing it. They pay half, we pay half so money is so much easier and just life in general. It's not for everyone but it makes us happy.

1. Um I'm vaguely Hispanic? My grandpa is from Columbia but I can't speak Spanish. My husband is just white as white can be hahaha. No, traditions we can think of!
2. My religious background is as kind of non-existent. My family really didn't raise me in any particular way. As I've gotten older I've become more... spiritual? I believe there is some sort of God even if it isn't exactly like at one religion. I'm not going to go into specifics here but yes, I've developed some religious belief. My husband's background is Christian. I think we plan to raise our kids to be very open minded and open to other religions. My husband wants to teach them what he believes but let them know it's up to them. I'm hoping to start going to a Unitarian church soon (once our move gets settled) and hopefully take our future kids.

 

[onlycurious]

@britebore Honduran and can barely speak a word of Spanish myself

 

[britebore]

@onlycurious Hahaha it's so sad! I can understand it okaaaaay but I can't speak it back. I really want to learn though! Maybe that'll be something to distract myself from babies with

 

[mooney]

@bernard222

1. Both of us are 27
2. 6 years together, married almost 5 months
3. I'm a graphic designer and my husband is a mechanical engineer
4. No before ttc career goals before really, I would love to be a stay at home mom but we don't think that's feasible with our first
5. We own a 3 bedroom, 2 bath house. Remodeling it from top to bottom. Plan on building our own house within 5 years on 5 acres of ground we own out in the countryside
6. No particular cultural traditions
7. Catholic and plan to raise our kids catholic

 

[joyce12]

@bernard222

1. How old are you and your SO?
   26 and 26!
2. How long have you and SO been together? What is your relationship status and do you plan to change your status before TTC?
   Since early November of 2016. We're practically engaged (he has a ring that we bought together, and I thinkkkk I'm getting proposed to by EOY!), and yes, we plan to get married before TTC, although I probably wouldn't care either way.
3. What do you and SO do for a living currently?
   He's an iOS mobile programmer for a consulting programming firm, and I'm a social media specialist for a global tech company.
4. What are your career plans before and after TTC?
   I plan on the SAHM route after TTC. He'll become the breadwinner.
5. Where do you live and what are your living arrangements like? Do you plan on moving?
   We recently moved in with his parents! Living rent free is allowing us to save up for a house before TTC. That's the one goal holding us back from TTC now.
6. What's your cultural backgrounds? Any cultural traditions you plan on passing down to your LO's?
   He's half European and half Armenian, I'm Iranian with Indian culture. We were raised pretty American outside of some food, and we're vegan now, so we don't really plan on raising them with too much outside of a knowledge and appreciation to their heritage.
7. What's your religious backgrounds? Do you plan on raising your kids with the same views?
   We're agnostic in the sense that you can't really deny that there isn't anything out there until its been proven, but otherwise we're atheist. We were both raised with religion, but don't care for it, and don't see any reason to pander to it. Ethics and reason should do the trick just fine!

If you have anything in common, please PM me! I'd love to have a Reddit pen pal to make the wait more bearable with!

 

[katrina2017]

@bernard222

1. I'm 28, he's 29.
2. Together almost 9 years, married 4 years.
3. I'm a policy fellow with my state government; he's a physician assistant.
4. Keep on keepin' on! After my fellowship, I'd like to remain at the executive level and move up as much as I can (not really interested in being a cabinet secretary, ever, though...)
5. We're buying a 4-bedroom house two weeks from tomorrow!!
6. No major cultural traditions. We'll make our own family traditions.
7. We're both agnostic...but I read the Bible every night. I want our kids to learn and appreciate all religions, and choose whatever path they feel is right for them. My parents attend church, so kids will definitely have exposure to that, at least around the holidays.

 

[katrina2017]

@bernard222 1) I'm 27 and DH is 25

2) We've been together 7 years total. Married for 2.

4) I'm honestly just planning to work my butt off for the next few months so I can save up a decent sized baby fund before I get pregnant and help rebuild our savings after we purchase a house. After we have a child, I'm being a stay at home mom until they are in school.

5) We live in a tiny town in Canada. Planning to buy a home here in the next 6-8 months.

 

[irvin]

@bernard222

1. I'm 28 and my partner is 33. We will be 30 and 35 when we ttc.
2. We have been together almost 4 years. We do not believe in marriage but might do it anyway because my partner is having a hard time obtaining health insurance. We'll see.
3. I'm a mother-baby nurse ♡ and he is a stay-at-home partner overall, though he does make $50 a week hosting karaoke at a bar.
4. I plan on staying right where I am, career-wise. My partner sometimes toys with the idea of getting a job before we have kids, but will be a SAHD after a baby is here for sure.
5. We live in a 2 bedroom apartment and will maybe buy a small house around here before a baby is here or while it is still an infant. My partner wants to move away from this area entirely by the time our child is a preteen due to the opioid epidemic. Idk about that. He would have to get a job haha.
6. I don't know our cultural backgrounds. We are white Americans and definitely don't wanna be instilling any white American values in our kids as we are communists, lol.
7. We are not religious.

Had fun reading everyone's answers♡.

 

[joiner12]

@bernard222 I'm a bit late to the party but here we go:

1. We're both 24 but he'll be 25 soon.
2. We've been together 7.5 years! We're currently engaged and will be getting married in October 2018.
3. He is currently a games developer and I work as a support officer in a medical rehousing team but my job is currently mainly admin rather than out of office.
4. He loves his job and will happily stay there for the foreseeable future but I would like something less office based, though I don't want to leave my company.
5. We've actually just bought a house earlier this year which would be more than enough room for 2 kids which is what we would like. No moving plans yet.
6. We were both born and raised in the same city in England and we don't really have a specific culture so much?
7. He was raised Christian but I wasn't. He's now an atheist like me but his family are still religious. We have no intention of raising them religious so I'm hoping his family will understand.

 

[lostgirl28]

@bernard222 I'm a little late the the party, but I love this!
1. SO is 28, I'm 22
2. We have been together almost 2.5 years, married for a year.
3. SO fracks for Schlumberger, volunteer captian of our fire Dept, and reserves as a police officer, I currently nanny.
4. I only have a year left with this family and my contract will be up at the same time as we plan to start trying so I will probably go back to daycare.
5. We live in a rent house in small town oklahoma, we plan on buying a modular/mobile home at the beginning of the year, to put on some land in the town we are in now.
6. My family is part German so we love cooking and family time, lots of get togethers and but not a lot of traditions that I can think of
7. SO was raised church of Christ, but I won him over to the Baptist side. We will definitely raise our children in church but give them the freedom to choose once they are old enough on if they want to continue to go to church.

 

[pensandpaper]

@bernard222

1. My husband and I just turned 30.
2. We've been together for 14 years, recently married in May.
3. I work in a veterinarian hospital and DH is a financial advisor.
4. I plan on continuing nursing school and hopefully work in a hospital setting.
5. We bought our house 7 years ago in Georgia. We don't have any plans on moving, but aren't against moving if his work takes him elsewhere.
6. We both have Polish and German backgrounds, but have no traditions.
7. He is Catholic and I'm Episcopalian. We're not currently practicing, but have discussed raising our children in both churches.

 

[haha11]

@bernard222 Hi, I'm late for this!

1. I am 26 and DH is 30.
2. We have been together for four years and married for one of those
3. I am a nurse and hubs is a financial advisor.
4. I'm currently a cardiac nurse but would like to be working in labor and delivery a year from now. I plan to basically be a SAHM (maybe working once a week tops) until our last one goes to pre-school and then go back to school to be a nurse midwife.
5. We just bought a house in January that we are renovating. We don't plan on moving for at least 10 years.
6. Just your standard American cultural traditions.
7. I was raised Catholic and DH was raised pretty non-religously. I would like to get our kids baptized but that will probably be the extent of religious things. I think a little light religion in the background is nice for kids but I don't see it being a huge part of our lives.

 

[glbx]

@bernard222

1. I'm 21 and my partner is 22.
2. 4 years in December but we met and dated a while when I was 14!
3. Engaged, no plans to change that before.
4. I work in the finance industry and OH works in a wear house
5. OH plans to work for the electric board (where my dad works and is pretty well respected and can help him get a foot in the door with a good recommendation) and I'm waiting for the company to expand so I can get promoted (hopefully) both will keep working though because my job is flexible, and has good maternity benefits so it fits well for the life that we plan to have.
6. We live in a 3 bed semi in the midlands of the UK, we like where we live because it's cheap to live here but would like to move to a nicer area of our town one day but will be TTC here and staying for the next 5 or 10 years.

7.were uncultured swines

1. Both atheists we won't christen our children either though where we live almost everyone does (regardless of if they are religious or not) but it is important to us to let our children explore their own religious beliefs and decide what they want for themselves.

 

[sophieleigh92]

@bernard222

1. We are both 27.
2. We've been together 3 and a half years, married for 2.
3. He's a journalist and I'm a bioinformatics developer.
4. I have no career plans before TTC, but hope to be able to keep my very non-stable temporary position for as long as I can. Same applies to post-TTC.
5. We live in the US (I am from Italy but moved here to be with my husband, about a year ago), we own our tiny single-family home and just have to convert our current office into a nursery.
6. I am Italian so I will try to speak only Italian to our future kids, so they can be bilingual. As for tradition, my background is that of a mostly-catholic country, so I will keep following that without the religious aspects.
7. I am not religious, my husband was raised Jewish but is currently not religious either. We plan on letting our kids choose their own religion when they are old enough to do so, and give them means to learn more about any until then.