Dating as a Single Dad is Frustrating

@rosine I share your pain! The apps are awful, I’ve only met two guys in the past 3 years that I’m friends with, and even that is more like pen pal friends, the majority of the rest have been… well, I’m still single and not even mad about it lol
My ex husband (dad to my younger 2) is remarried, friends (with kids) that got out of relationships around the same time as me are now in long term relationships… I’m happy for their happiness, but it’s hard seeing what feels like everyone else around you being in these relationships. Some days it hurts more than others and it’s incredibly lonely. You’re not alone in the struggle 🤗
 
@rosine I, too, feel the same.

I separated from my ex in 2017. I am also a full-time parent as their mother is out of the picture.

I have had 2 relationships that lasted between 1 - 2 years since then.

Unfortunately, both ended in a breakup.

After this last round, I have kinda given up myself.

However, I am still hopeful that I will meet someone.

Keep your head up, dude. Online dating sucks.

Recently, I asked a girl for her # the old school way and got it.

We are all deserving of love along with our children.

If they are gaslighting you about the fact you have kids, they are not worth the time or effort.
 
@rosine I felt like it was a lot easier for my ex to move on as a single parent than it was for me. I blame part of that in that women look at dads that take of their kids as providers. Men look at my kids and think I need a daddy for them. I don’t. Their dad is active in their life. I’m actually the breadwinner not their dad. Just wish I could find someone who could be my best friend and equal partner who didn’t look at kids as too much baggage. I’ve stayed away from dating sites because I always felt used. Half aren’t looking for a serious relationship but don’t want to say that for a while, 10% are actually there to be that person, and the other 40% are just looking for someone to take advantage of. That could just be my experience but it’s so freaking hard. I work full time make decent money but also am a full time mom. Every date I feel like I’m choosing between my kids and that date and I feel so guilty even trying.
 
@rosine Personally would never want my blessing of my x wife first of all none of her business who date or Fack... Get out there mingle stop being poor me .. go clean some pipes love ur life and ur kids just make sure meet someone who will be good with ur kids and urself.. make time for urself get out there buds ... Plenty fish in sea ..upwards and onwards.. go over seas do you .. meet other girls and cultures they don't have to be ruthless Canadian girls lol jk there some good ones out there .
 
@rosine I feel you. I gave up after my last relationship too. He didn’t understand the fact that my daughter needed attention. She’s a teen now. And it’s super difficult to date as a single parent.
 
@rosine I don’t care that she knows I’ve been single for so long as I’ve learned to be happy being by myself, but that “blessing” comment really caught me off guard, even for her.
 
@rosine I get where you're coming from. I'm a 30 year old single mom with a school-aged special needs kid, and it's been really brutal trying to date in recent years. (His father isn't involved at all) People nowadays get turned off when I tell them I'm involved in my son's life, and nobody reads my bio on my profile half the time. I just don't have time for people who don't respect me or my son. You seem like you're a good dad, props for doing the right thing, and focusing on your kid.
 
@rosine You sound like such a genuine father and person and as trite as this comment may seem, the right woman will appreciate that so much.

I do think it gets easier as we get older - in general people become more open to dating people with kids.

I’d maybe think through the right time to share info about your daughter when dating. I’d 100% call it out in bold in your profile to avoid disappointment of women not keen on this but you can share more details when it feels right. I’d also maybe consider dating an older woman? You sound very mature and who knows who you might click with.
 
@rosine Are you ready to date or just doing so more out of it being pushed upon you? I feel like everyone is always like "oh, you should meet insert name" or "Have you tried", but if you're not ready, you're not going to find the right one and take time for you. Who cares how long it's been, imo! Maybe you'll find a great match when you're not even looking for one.
 
@rosine I have 4 special needs kids I totally feel your pain. I've been divorced for 3 years and it is so hard having dating being a parent. But I promise the right woman won't be bothered by that and will be a great help to you. Don't let your ex dictate who you date or marry that's not fair to you. Dating in general these days is so complicated and if you're not absolutely perfect you get dropped after the first date. I'm sure you're wonderful and those ladies are missing out
 
@rosine As a 25 year old single mom of a 9 year old, I feel your pain. You’re not alone in feeling helpless when it comes to dating. But there is always someone out there for everyone. Best of luck to you.
 
@rosine Relatable, except single mom lol. You sound like a wonderful dad, I’m surprised that isn’t enough to make a good woman wanna get to know you. I can’t give you advice cuz I’m in the same boat at 32 years old but I’m wishing you good luck!
 
@rosine My advice is to quit trying and focus on your daughter and other things that make you happy — work, friends, hobbies, etc. The more you pour into you, the more likely that the right one comes along, but if not you’ll still be happy. The other thing is your age — 28? That’s the problem. Wait seven years or longer…you’ll have a line waiting.
 
@rosine Yeah I feel this post entirely as a working 31 year old single mom of 4 with limited help from their dad or any family l have given up lol 😂
 
@rosine You're an awesome dad! I'm recently separated from my wife. My daughter and I have been attached at the hip since birth. We even spent 7 months together as "work at home coworkers" in 2020. It hurts to be away from her, but the excitement on her face when I arrive helps that pain.

Word of advice, love will happen when you least expect it. Someone will come along. I started dating my ex after we met up with a group of mutual friends for a night of celebrating. I met my current partner after simply asking for opinions on an apartment complex I was considering moving to. Don't be hard on yourself. Keep on being the great guy that you are.
 
@rosine I'm 24 single mom of 2. The dating poll for our age rage if you're looking for something serious sucks even without kids. they're just looking to have fun and find themselves, etc. Mix kids in with it, majority are not mature enough to grasp the concept of what it takes to be a single parent since they're not one. Some are just not ready to be a parent themselves. Going into a serious dating/relationship with someone with kids they've gotta understand from the beginning that the end game they would ultimately be a step parent. You just gotta hang in there, keep being a great father. 🖤As for the ex-wife, maybe she truly is concerned, she doesn't want you lonely. At the same time, giving you her blessing is a tad bit weird. Did you give her your blessing when she married her husband? 😂
 
@rosine Ugh…sorry to say this but dating is awful. You are younger so maybe you will have better luck finding someone than I have.
I’m a 54 F. I have been a widow for 6 years. It turns out that being a widow is worse than being divorced or kryptonite.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Similar threads

T
Why does it seem like dating as a single parent is impossible?
3 4 5
Replies
98
Views
664
jkcoke
J
L
Seeking advice: Dating as a coparenting single mom, in a complicated relationship
3 4 5
Replies
89
Views
652
thedupuis
T
B
First US - Dating Question/Reassurance
Replies
10
Views
104
bev81
B
D
Plain given up on dating, but I don't feel too bad about it
3 4 5
Replies
99
Views
496
jinpark77
J
H
Dating a mother of 2 daughters. Looking for insight and experiences
Replies
9
Views
110
standev
S
Back
Top