When is it okay to rough house?

[tepseek89]

@red00shift I was studying psychology in Ontario when he started gaining a following. He was a reasonably respected behavioural psychologist before he became whatever the heck he is now. It's not surprising that he has decent advice when he sticks to his area of expertise.

But even ignoring what he's done to a generation of young men, his newer books kinda ignore the research methodology he used to respect. Plenty of other psychologists with good advice.

 

[christainchris]

@tepseek89 Can you expand on what you mean by what he's done to a generation of young men? I find him fairly reasonable on most issues, but don't agree on everything he says. But would generally say his work helps young men. He's not in Andrew Tate territory.

 

[jasonfight7]

@wintair123 Do you have a reference you could share?

 

[wintair123]

@jasonfight7 I’ll try to find the exact videos but he talks about it fairly often

 

[mylordyeshuathemessiah]

@iowagander Damn man if I tried that at 18 my dad would just scowl and say “what’s the matter with you boy.” Kinda jealous

 

[heatherdawn]

@iowagander I'm about 30-0 with my kids, but oldest isn't even 2 yet so I feel it could be higher.

 

[candy08]

@clarabel 0 to 6 months growl and raspberries

my kid is 11 months now I I tickle, dangle, toss very gently, "drop," and stuffy attack. he especially enjoys getting attacked by squishmellows.

 

[sataris]

@candy08 Squishmellows are just meant to be hurled at children. My wife is always shocked when I do it. But my 4yo daughter loves it.

 

[odeltaple]

@clarabel It’s just so damn fun for both of us, my boy is 19 months now and he actively engages me in rough housing, once I get the upper hand and have him on the floor tickling and snuffling him he’ll be giggling maniacally, as soon as he says “daddy stop, daddy stop” I stop and let him get up and he’ll pretend he’s walking off, look at me out the corner of his eye with a big cheeky grin and then charge me giggling his head off.
The roughest I go is gently throwing him on the bed or dragging him across the floor slowly by his legs.
The line that sets him off most is I’ll crawl towards him doing a silly growl and say “The cuddle monster is going to get you” that’s when he knows it’s on and starts giggling and powering up.
Dude I love it, I can’t wait to he’s old enough to properly play fight, I used to love that with my Dad.
But yeah, I think 6 months is when we started a bit of very gentle rougher play, and he found it super funny so we’ve just gradually ramped up the intensity as he’s got bigger and more active.
It’s definitely good for him, I feel like it makes him feel more confident in his body and helps him to connect movement with having fun. It’ll also teach him appropriate levels of aggression in play and safe boundaries.

 

[jeremy444777]

@odeltaple Keep up that rhythm of immediately stopping when he says "stop." Gotta have the fun rough housing, but also gotta teach limits, boundaries, and consent. Comes in handy when it's your turn to ask him to stop being so physical/is pushing an unsafe boundary

 

[elahmine]

@clarabel I've been using my kid as a workout machine since day one brother

 

[lisedgmr]

@clarabel 11+ is when you get them into paintball, then you get to stealth shoot them from behind and laugh at them. Make a chest rig that can hold them and use them a human shield.

 

[christina420]

@lisedgmr Boffer combat. Weapons made of padded PVC, helmets out of buckets, armor out of whatever you can whip together.

 

[lisedgmr]

@christina420 I would say you could start that in 6-10 range

 

[bsellars]

@lisedgmr

Make a chest rig that can hold them and use them a human shield.

I like where your head's at, dad

 

[dwj1203]

@bsellars Head behind cover, you will never go wrong

 

[resimaenglina]

@clarabel I didn't grow up with a dad, but now that I am one rough-housing seems very instinctual. I almost never see a harm in it, and I think it is super valuable for dads to do it especially with sons.

 

[xrt]

@clarabel My 2 year old will Teabag me like he is playing Halo.

 

[lea_alter]

@clarabel Been wrestling with my daughter since she was about 15 months old. She's a beast.

 

[kkrive]

@clarabel I'll wrestle my kids as long as I can take them!

My brother is 30 and my dad is 60 and they still get after each other sometimes haha