Son broke up with his girlfriend because she was too “freaky”

[jaxsn]

My 13 year old told me today that he broke up with his girlfriend of a few of days because she was sending him explicit pictures and videos and it was too much for him. I am very proud of him for having boundaries and sticking to them and then she said “all boys are the same”. Makes me think multiple boys have told her to F off because she’s too inappropriate.

24 hr update.

Son does not have any pictures or videos. Said they were all sent via Snapchat and they aren’t saved at all.

Girl is also his friends friend from his friends hometown so he never actually met her in person. So going to school or talking to her parents is out of the question.

 

[mitoman]

@jaxsn I’d ask him to make sure to delete anything she sent, from all possible places it could be saved.

 

[wandalouise]

@mitoman This is important because in some places (in the US at least), just having the pics (depending on the pic) can expose you to legal risk. It's worth an extra look to make sure they're all gone.

 

[resolve413]

@wandalouise It’s incredibly important to make sure this is removed from any sort of family data sharing plan as well. A friend of mine is an attorney who deals specifically with these kind of situations. There is a case she shares where a dad went to jail for nudes his son had received and had been automatically backed up to the family iCloud account. He never even knew they were online but when the relationship went south and the son shared a photo with a friend, the girls family reported it to the police and upon investigation it was determined the dad was “in possession” even without his knowledge. Several friends of mine no longer have family sharing plans for this very reason. Case law hasn’t quite figured out how to handle this situation yet.

 

[avi90able]

@resolve413 iCloud is absolute cancer in this kind of scenario. I work in a high-profile law firm and it's such a pain in the butt to educate our lawyers as to why they shouldn't have any work material at all on their personal phone because it all ends up in iCloud in some shape or form.

 

[sdem2]

@avi90able tell your IT person to use Managed Apple ID's if they can for your firm. It encapsulates iCloud to help prevent data leaks

 

[avi90able]

@sdem2 We do! Doesn't stop people from finding ways to get the data onto unmanaged apps or locations, unfortunately.

 

[krysfaust00]

@resolve413 Wow, my kids are too little for this now, but absolutely bonkers how fast things have changed since when I was a kid. Sexting wasn't a thing even when I was in college (20 years ago.)

 

[gsfaikacs]

@krysfaust00 Having known many and multiple people who were sexting 20+ years ago. It definitely was, just maybe not in your area.

 

[strangekeys]

@gsfaikacs That was reserved for things like AIM chat and ICQ though. Your phone could technically text, although I don't think anybody was sexting on a Blackberry, but I could be wrong.

 

[deardoris]

@strangekeys T9 FTW

 

[kentrasso]

@deardoris 88 44 88 0 6 33 0 7777 666 666 666 0 44 666 777 66 999

 

[deardoris]

@kentrasso The joy of T9 is not having to push the button multiple times

 

[gsfaikacs]

@strangekeys Definitely talking about on the phone. Fun fact, photo texting even, began in March 2002. That's 22 years ago now.

Perhaps college was long ago for you than you remember/realize?

 

[strangekeys]

@gsfaikacs In 2002, I was in University. The rich kids had Nokias or Blackberries, but most of us relied on a landline still. Each dorm room had a landline going to it. When I graduated in 2004, most people at work had Blackberries, and nobody really had much better (was there anything better than a Blackberry then?). It wasn't until several years later that the first iPhone came out.

 

[gsfaikacs]

@strangekeys Oh, I'm aware. Just saying that as soon as people could send a text message, people were sending sex messages. As soon as they could send a picture. Nudes were shared. "If it exists, there is porn of it" has been always true.

 

[strangekeys]

@gsfaikacs I won't argue with that. I'm sure if I had a Blackberry in 2002, I would be looking at nudes.

 

[minyen94]

@gsfaikacs Sexting on a Nokia 3310 was a bitch.

 

[pattysb]

@minyen94 You really have to want it.

 

[alexkjv33]

@gsfaikacs I know Blackberries had been released by 2004 but now I'm imagining sexting on an old numeric keypad basically being like Monica's description of erogenous zones from Friends... Thanks for getting that stuck in my head for the rest of the day.

Here a link so you too can get it stuck in your head...