I am team crib til college. Change my mind
- Thread starter neverbeenalone
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@tv191 My 3 year old is still in his crib. He tried to climb in a few times with my husband’s assistance but the climbing just wasn’t for him. We converted his crib to a bed for a few weeks. Damn it it was like having a newborn again, he wouldn’t stay in his crib to fall asleep or stay asleep in the middle of the night, and he was waking up at 3:45 am for the day. Front of the crib went back on and he’s as happy as a clam. 
neverbeenalone
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englishantebellum
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@tv191 My 3-year-old daughter is still in her crib too and she’s 41” tall. I think she never bothered to climb out because she’s always been in Woolino sleep sacks, so she can’t lift her foot high enough. She’s never tried to lean out either. She seems to really like being snuggled up in her crib. If we sleep in too long and she needs to use the bathroom, she just stands up and starts saying “mom?” until we come get her.
We’ll get her a bed next year though so we can use the crib for her new baby sibling.
We’ll get her a bed next year though so we can use the crib for her new baby sibling.
@neverbeenalone Cribs aren’t safe for kids over 36 inches tall
@neverbeenalone My 3 year old is in a twin bed now, I like being able to lay with him and read him a story in bed. To each their own, there are definitely drawbacks thoufh
lovesredemption
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@neverbeenalone We would have kept going at 32 months, but the the sibling was born. It has been a tough ride ever since. I wasn’t about to buy another one though.
masterpiece
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@neverbeenalone We switched at 15 months. And we’ll do it again with our second. Our choice was partially based in a desire to do it slowly and gently, rather than in a panic after she climbed out. We had zero issues with the transition. We spent a week role playing with the bed, talking about it, cuddling and reading stories in it but still having her sleep in the crib, etc. She got excited about it and did totally fine. We couldn’t have done that as gently and specifically chosen during a time where she was emotionally happy and not dealing with other issues if we had waited until it was an emergency. Also, transitions are a lot easier at 1, when they kind of just go “oh, this is what we do now,” than at 2 or 3, when everything is a battle of the wills. Waiting until she inevitably tried to climb out at 2 seemed pointless. Whenever people say “we waited until 3.5 and it was still disastrous,” I’m like… maybe it wasn’t “still” disastrous, maybe it was disastrous BECAUSE you waited.
I don’t really get the “crib till college” mentality. I like giving my kids more freedom and independence. My toddler is now 3 and I can’t even fathom the idea of lifting her into a crib. I don’t really see what the point is either - she’s still confined to her room, so it doesn’t make bedtime or nap time any more of a battle, it just gives her more freedom to get up and play in the morning. On days that she’s going to fight a nap, she could do it just as well in a crib haha. She’s had days where she’s ran to the door or fallen asleep on her play mat, yes, but she’s been 100% fine and is 100% the exact same sleeper she was before we transitioned.
From a safety perspective the 35 inch limit isn’t just about climbing, it’s also about tipping over accidentally. It especially makes me nervous when people talk about all the crazy lengths they go through to keep them from climbing - that really just makes the attempts to climb more dangerous. You’re also technically not supposed to ever have blankets or pillows or toys in a crib, that’s supposed to be introduced only once they’re in an un-enclosed bed - but nobody seems to follow that safe sleep rule either. And in terms of baby proofing, it seems much safer to put in the effort and babyproof, rather than just leaving the room hazardous and hoping that your kid doesn’t climb out one night and suddenly access it all.
I don’t really get the “crib till college” mentality. I like giving my kids more freedom and independence. My toddler is now 3 and I can’t even fathom the idea of lifting her into a crib. I don’t really see what the point is either - she’s still confined to her room, so it doesn’t make bedtime or nap time any more of a battle, it just gives her more freedom to get up and play in the morning. On days that she’s going to fight a nap, she could do it just as well in a crib haha. She’s had days where she’s ran to the door or fallen asleep on her play mat, yes, but she’s been 100% fine and is 100% the exact same sleeper she was before we transitioned.
From a safety perspective the 35 inch limit isn’t just about climbing, it’s also about tipping over accidentally. It especially makes me nervous when people talk about all the crazy lengths they go through to keep them from climbing - that really just makes the attempts to climb more dangerous. You’re also technically not supposed to ever have blankets or pillows or toys in a crib, that’s supposed to be introduced only once they’re in an un-enclosed bed - but nobody seems to follow that safe sleep rule either. And in terms of baby proofing, it seems much safer to put in the effort and babyproof, rather than just leaving the room hazardous and hoping that your kid doesn’t climb out one night and suddenly access it all.
@enigmadi Can't agree more. For a bunch of reasons, we kept our daughter in her crib longer than expected (2+5ish months), and what finally forced our hand was her climbing out. Since then, I've been reading more about building autonomy (Jamie Glowacki especially), and she links moving out of a crib with easier potty training, life skill building, etc. Makes a lot of sense to me and, anecdotally, I can see a big difference in our daughter since we made the transition. She was already daytime potty trained, but has really blossomed in a whole lot of other areas.
She's my one and only, so I'm in no rush for her to grow up, but I think it's more important that she's developing appropriately. We do seem to have a weird set up these days where we infantalize kids in so many ways, but then expect them to "be more responsible", "behave better", listen the first time, etc, even when it's not developmentally appropriate.
She's my one and only, so I'm in no rush for her to grow up, but I think it's more important that she's developing appropriately. We do seem to have a weird set up these days where we infantalize kids in so many ways, but then expect them to "be more responsible", "behave better", listen the first time, etc, even when it's not developmentally appropriate.
churchbuilder
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@masterpiece Just to provide you with an alternative perspective;
My kids are 3 and 4. 4yo switched out of the crib at 15 months because he started climbing out. No problems with the transition, and it’s been great. 3.5 yo is still in her crib! She absolutely loves her crib. She can climb out, but she chooses not to. She generally will Lay in her crib in the morning until we go to get her - we don’t know for how long, because the latest we have left her in there is 9am but she never has asked to come out or attempt to get out without a grown up in the room. She climbs in every night.
I have no doubt that the move to a bed will be easy, but I just don’t see the need when she’s comfortable and there aren’t any issues. She’s also fiercely independent. If she truly wanted, she could climb out and read books in the morning - she just doesn’t want to lmao.
So yep - had one kid in each, and there are reasons to do both. You don’t need to understand other peoples’ reasoning to respect it
My kids are 3 and 4. 4yo switched out of the crib at 15 months because he started climbing out. No problems with the transition, and it’s been great. 3.5 yo is still in her crib! She absolutely loves her crib. She can climb out, but she chooses not to. She generally will Lay in her crib in the morning until we go to get her - we don’t know for how long, because the latest we have left her in there is 9am but she never has asked to come out or attempt to get out without a grown up in the room. She climbs in every night.
I have no doubt that the move to a bed will be easy, but I just don’t see the need when she’s comfortable and there aren’t any issues. She’s also fiercely independent. If she truly wanted, she could climb out and read books in the morning - she just doesn’t want to lmao.
So yep - had one kid in each, and there are reasons to do both. You don’t need to understand other peoples’ reasoning to respect it
masterpiece
New member
@churchbuilder I don’t not respect it haha. I just don’t really understand it. I’m glad you had a good experience with both! My point was just that choosing to do it early means you get to pick a time that is otherwise stress-free, etc. Personally I think the odds of having a good experience are higher when you can do it gradually and at a selected time, rather than in an emergency. I don’t disagree that a positive experience is possible with both approaches though!
I’m primarily confused by people who follow all other safety “rules” to the T but ignore the risk of falling from a crib once they’re 35 inches. I don’t judge the people who are aware of the limit and acknowledge that there is a level of risk, but have personally decided that the risk is acceptable for them. I think we all make risk assessments all the time based on our family’s needs. I really just don’t get the people who are sticklers about every other safety rule but seem to ignore this one!
ETA: Also, I do judge the people who do things like modifying the crib in unsafe ways and putting their kids in sleep sacks when they’re already trying to climb, because that clearly impacts the risk. If you have a toddler who doesn’t try to climb and it works for both of you, and you’re aware of the risks but have decided it’s an acceptable risk for you, I don’t judge that! It’s when people start creating entrapment risks by putting the mattress on the floor inside the crib, etc that I draw the line.
I’m primarily confused by people who follow all other safety “rules” to the T but ignore the risk of falling from a crib once they’re 35 inches. I don’t judge the people who are aware of the limit and acknowledge that there is a level of risk, but have personally decided that the risk is acceptable for them. I think we all make risk assessments all the time based on our family’s needs. I really just don’t get the people who are sticklers about every other safety rule but seem to ignore this one!
ETA: Also, I do judge the people who do things like modifying the crib in unsafe ways and putting their kids in sleep sacks when they’re already trying to climb, because that clearly impacts the risk. If you have a toddler who doesn’t try to climb and it works for both of you, and you’re aware of the risks but have decided it’s an acceptable risk for you, I don’t judge that! It’s when people start creating entrapment risks by putting the mattress on the floor inside the crib, etc that I draw the line.
@neverbeenalone My toddler is about to be 3 in January, and he loves his crib. He sleeps like crap in a normal bed. I think it’s the feeling of being enclosed. I’m not in a hurry to change it.
katrina2017
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@neverbeenalone My kid tried to climb out immediately after she became technically capable of doing so. I’m dreading the day she can open closed doors by herself.
fundementalzero
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@neverbeenalone Nope! Perfectly reasonable. My son isn't 3 yet, but I fully plan to keep him in his crib as long as he wants to, until we night train anyway. And we have a little one on the way. We're planning on a pack and play for her if my son still wants his crib, even though he'll be nearly 3 when she's here.
He sleeps through the night without a peep. To me, that is gold. I won't give that up.
He sleeps through the night without a peep. To me, that is gold. I won't give that up.
@fundementalzero We didn't have any sleep trouble transitioning to a toddler bed, so you never know.
fundementalzero
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jelizgasha
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@neverbeenalone I was really hoping to get my 2 year old into his toddler bed but he is adamant about keeping his crib lol if I give him the choice he picks the crib. I'm 34 weeks and was hoping to have him transitioned by the time the baby comes but it doesn't look like that's happening
@jelizgasha Ha ha I tried to move my 2 year old into a crib in time for my younger daughter to have it. She’s 2 years and 8 months now and still in there. Absolutely refuses to stay in her toddler bed.