Coparent’s new GF is vulgar

[felixx7139]

@jham123 As moms, it’s in our nature to want to protect our children so yes you are completely in your right to be concerned and worried. Unfortunately though, as Im also learning for myself, we can’t control what happens at our coparent’s house nor the people they have around our babies. All we can do if possible is speak to our coparent in a professional and respectful manner regarding our concerns and just ask that they be mindful of the children and their feelings and hope that these new individuals in their lives are positive role models who do no harm to our kids. Sending you a big hug and all the love, personally I know this is tough.

 

[laidback]

@jham123 There is nothing you can do about your coparents GF. Disengage NOW and find a good therapist.

 

[childofgod001]

@jham123 Stay off her socials. Stop doing background checks. Trust your coparent to be a good father to his child and extend to him the courtesy of staying out of his private life.

 

[hallbee66]

@jham123 Gotta let it go as long as she is good to your child. My ex is living with someone I used to be friends with and who got her kid taken by cps (and whose parenting in general I always disagreed with AND whose dad is a sex offender who comes to the house to pick her up) but I have to try to chill because there's literally nothing I can do.

 

[chrissyhannah538]

@hallbee66 your ex lets the sex offender around your child???

 

[hallbee66]

I literally called the police. They said to mind my own business. He doesn't live there so there isn't anything to.do.

 

[johnisweeney]

@jham123 I doubt a a judge would do much since her criminal record is not violent charges. Does she have a current driver’s license? I get your concern but talk to a lawyer about your options if you have any. I wouldn’t want her driving my child in a car if her license is not current. Sadly, just because we feel she’s dangerous doesn’t mean legally a judge will side with you.

 

[heavensvoice]

@jham123 Why does it matter what the opinion of a bunch of strangers are?

She’s his girlfriend. You don’t get to pick his girlfriends. That’s his job.

 

[jham123]

@heavensvoice Yes of course I completely understand that. I was just trying to see if my opinions are in line with other people with my concerns or if I’m being out of line.

 

[laidback]

@jham123 Completely over the top out of line!!! Sounds like you are going to choose not to listen to the opinions you asked for so good luck to you. Make sure to get your kid a really good therapist for the future.

 

[jham123]

@laidback Thank you for your feedback. Can you elaborate?

 

[jeffkruif]

@jham123 I just wanted to chime in OP, that I am a mother to a 4yo and my social media personally reflects my life as a full grown adult and not as a mother. I still like to have fun, I still like to do adult things and be vulgar sometimes. I keep my son entirely separate from that and do not display that behavior in front of him. Just because she lives her adult life on fb doesn't mean that she isn't capable of being a responsible and loving role model for your son when hes around her.

 

[jham123]

@jeffkruif Thank you

 

[jham123]

@laidback I’ve listened to every opinion posted on this comment.

 

[guitarguy8424]

@jham123 I’ve listened to *argued* every opinion posted on this comment.

Fixed it for you.

 

[jham123]

@guitarguy8424 If you take the time to look at all the opinions posted you will see that is not what I’ve done. I didn’t need you to fix anything for me.

 

[guitarguy8424]

@jham123 So what did you find? Are your opinions in line with other people? From what I'm reading in these comments, it looks like you only have one person agreeing. You need therapy, not background checks.

 

[jham123]

@guitarguy8424 Read comments again. More than 1 person is agreeing. I came here for opinions, not arguments, not debates, not to be belittled. I was posting in the coparent sub to get support and opinions from other like minded people that might be In similar situations. I was simply reaching out to a group of my peers. Your comments have been inflammatory from the beginning, Thank you for your feedback. Your responses on this post are no longer needed.

 

[guitarguy8424]

@jham123 You're right, I counted 2. You should definitely focus on the 2 people that agree with you, not the 17 that don't. Good luck in your opinion search.

 

[heavensvoice]

@jham123 This is honestly coming off as a little catty/meangirlish.

What do you want people to say? She’s trashy? Will that help you feel any better?

Why don’t you just wait and see how she treats your child before judging her.