Called 9-11 on daughter

[shek]

@jar1437 Can you reframe this, would that help a little? You didn’t call the cops on her in my eyes, you called emergency services FOR her because she was acting in a way that made you think she wasn’t doing very well.
Keep circling back to how much you love her and how afraid you are for her.

 

[luvleleo123]

@shek This! You calling was about her health and safety as much as your OP! PLEASE try to get her inpatient treatment. This is the actual reason they exist. She is in crisis and is a danger to others and possibly herself. This is a health emergency!

 

[godschild3187]

@jar1437 988 is great, but if there is a weapon involved, police are going to come 100% of the time. A mobile crisis unit will not come out if there is a weapon reported, or at least not alone. You did the right thing, even though it was scary and horrible for the both of you. Hopefully you can get her connected with an eating disorder program to get her stabilized, and then start working on the depression aspect.

 

[ianthe]

@jar1437 A partner has zero right to be mad at you abou5 a situation they are unable to experience.

You have the right to protect yourself and your child and mental health intervention is protection.

Stick to your guns. You did the best you could with what you have.

 

[jar1437]

@ianthe Thank you, that might be the worst part of this for me. He's blaming me for all of this and my "melodrama" of calling emergency services. He enables her eating disorder by not minding much if she doesn't eat. At the same time I don't always feel safe alone with her and they get along well so I need his help right now

 

[crombymnanoto]

@jar1437 Please leave this man. Protect yourself and your children from him and leave. I would not be surprised if some of your daughter's issues stem from his behaviour and your acceptance of it.

Also, therapy. For you and your daughter.

 

[thomasstrock]

@jar1437 This is why we need another line for these types of incidents. I feel for you.

 

[jar1437]

@thomasstrock Totally. I hate that police respond to mental health

 

[sannabanana94]

@jar1437 You called for a domestic violence situation. They aren't going to send in anyone from the medical team until the area is secure, and there's no longer a physical threat to anyone s safety. I'm sorry you're traumatized from it, but there is no "instead you got an officer." They did exactly what you called 911 for, cop was able to calm the situation down, and it sounds like get your daughter help.

 

[katrina2017]

@jar1437 Because there is a weapon involved, police 100% have to show up.

 

[rylt]

@jar1437 I would check to see if 988 is available in your area.

It is for mental health crises, and, per my state website they

"immediately provide phone-based support and connections to local resources.

If needed, the counselor can:

Activate a mobile mental health crisis team that will arrive on site;
Provide therapeutic interventions; and/or
Make referrals for outpatient services or transportation for further evaluation."

Because, yes, police are not equipped to deal with a mental health crisis like your daughter was having. We need better emergency services training in this country unfortunately.

 

[sicky12]

@jar1437 Psych assessment won’t show if there is a weapon involved, that is considered a domestic violence call (used to do crisis assessments)

 

[kristoffer8219]

@jar1437 Where I live there have been 2 police involved shooting that were dealing with people having a mental episode and it resulted in both dying. It is so sad that it came to that! They really need to make a number you can call for this! Hope you are able to get the help your daughter needs!

 

[doodieberry]

@jar1437 I know it’s going to be scary, but anorexia is really, really difficult to recover from. I think an inpatient psych ward or eating disorder clinic will be the best option here- you need professional help, and a lot of it. She will obviously be mad at first that you are making her go, but those facilities can do some amazing things sometimes. I hope you both get some help and relief soon- so so sorry you had to go through that.

 

[butterscoth]

@jar1437 ED is the fucking worst. I used to be so proud that I hadn’t eaten in days. It’s such an obsessive disease. Hoping she gets into an inpatient program asap. I know it’s hard but I’d personally not force her to eat until there’s some level of therapy involved. If it’s really bad, take her to the ER - they can help get her into a program too. Might be faster

 

[psychewriter]

@jar1437 I think you did the right thing. But continue to take the next steps. Your daughter isn’t well and hopefully with the right steps you can help her get back to being herself.

 

[moomoo5987]

@jar1437 As someone that has had anorexia since I was 13 (in recovery for a long time at this point), PLEASE use that psych referral and get her into an eating disorder inpatient unit asap. It is critical. Anorexia is very deadly and absolutely wreaks havoc on you

 

[hearno3vil]

@jar1437 You were being threatened, 911 was justified

 

[abbey_in_wonderland]

@jar1437 Typically cops come when you call 9-11. Their arrival shouldn’t have traumatized you since you should have expected it and especially since he was nice

 

[caxyxn]

@abbey_in_wonderland Yeah my husband called 911 because I was having a baby and they still sent police officers before EMS so there was no chance they weren’t coming for this.