@aelfex I'm so sorry internet stranger, you don't deserve that. No one does, but clearly if even some of what you wrote is accurate, you definitely don't. And your story is far too easy to believe and common.
What I'm going to say has been echoed already, I'm just going to add that in my opinion, being a parent means we don't have the luxury of being optimistic; if you want to try and eek it out a while longer to tell yourself you tried absolutely everything, then fine. But I think you already know where this leads. And as a parent, that means putting a plan in place so that you and your daughter aren't caught out. Your husband is already showing himself to be someone who makes financially unsound snap decisions, and you should not be letting him control your finances, as well as being checked out as a partner. Shore up an escape raft. Have a plan. A line drawn in the sand. And stick to it.
The fact he has you playing the part of the one begging him to stay shows he's already manipulating the situation to his favour. Sometimes, doing it alone is easier than parenting two and having to question if one is going to sabotage at every turn or leave you high and dry unexpetedly. Even in the little ways as with the car wash. His issues are not your responsibility, your daughter is.
I truly wish you all the best, mama.
