Anyone else walk into a big box store and feel like they’re the only ones awake in some sort of toxic capitalist matrix?

[doubra]

@saintonfire I don’t blame the parents at all, and I’m sorry if my post sounded that way. I blame the corporations, I blame the government for being in the corporations pockets, I blame generations of this being indoctrinated into us. I blame everything else than the parents trying to do the best they can with what they have.

 

[saintonfire]

@doubra I didn't necessarily see you as shaming the parent, but many comments in this thread seem to believe that nutritional literacy alone can solve this problem. It can't. Corporate greed and the wealth gap are a problem. Our lack of social supports is a problem. People need more than money and knowledge to act on information. It's about access, power, support, and time. Most of these decisions are way way way outside the scope of average people.

Plus, and it sounds like I'm in the minority here, many processed foods are totally fine! I look at giving my kids cereal (which is usually fortified) for breakfast as a way to avoid giving multivitamins (which are zero percent regulated). This is a live trade off I personally make for my family. Choosing this doesn't make me uneducated or uncaring about my kids' health.

 

[doubra]

@saintonfire Well said. Corporate greed makes the wealth gap, and conveniently those wealthiest are the ones who govern our social supports. It’s all a tangled up mess.

 

[beauty1993]

@saintonfire New mom here. I’m trying to do better with my second but I’m sure I messed up a lot with my first, just by not knowing better.

 

[saintonfire]

@beauty1993 Honestly you are doing great! We do what we can with the information we have. And having all that information doesn't always help. I'm sure both your kids are healthy and thriving

 

[doubra]

@beauty1993 I definitely have messed up my whole life and am still learning. You’re doing great, I promise you.

 

[ladym1977]

@doubra Counterpoint - we are extremely lucky to live at the point in civilization where we have the production capacity and logistics to offer such a wide variety of non-perishable foods to so many people. Some of those options are better than others in nutrition, access and distribution is deeply imperfect and inequitable, and families have to trade off on time vs. the ideal but I’m for one perfectly okay with this alleged dystopia.

 

[zastari]

@ladym1977 I’m with you on that. There is a lot of problems with the hyper-modern convenience based society we live in now. But also, my grandparents lived in Mennonite colonies in the middle of BF nowhere and the romanticization of living off grid and “wild” is crazy to me. It is a lot harder than people imagine it to be and not the magical country fairy dream people imagine it to be! Farm accident deaths and injuries are horrible and I am so grateful to be able to buy my food from a store.

 

[doubra]

@ladym1977 Some processed foods are definitely better than others and I am by no means saying that I do not buy some for convenience and nutrition! Thank you for your perspective.

 

[julia736]

@doubra I think everyone on this sub needs to take a big deep breath and remember everyone is doing the best they can. Also, a popsicle or the occasional McDonald’s isn’t going to “poison” anyone. Holy smokes. What an exhaustingly rigid way to live.

 

[saxology]

@julia736 I agree. Reading posts like this in this sub makes me think I’m more mildly granola and not moderately lol. My daughter eats pretty decent for being 4 and autistic, but every now and then I don’t feel bad about buying and enjoying treats with her. She doesn’t regularly eat Cheetos or chips or watch screens in public, but sometimes we all have our days and sometimes it’s either screaming or screen time. I just bought Capri Suns for her for the first time in 2 years as a fun treat and now I’m wondering which granola parent in the store was judging my cart lol.

 

[pink1310]

@julia736 I'm now feeling judged for being seen feeding my kids French fries... I mean, we all have moments. Judging a parent by the 60 seconds you see them interacting with their kid in a store is kind of bizarre. Also, if you're seeing it, you are also in the store presumably buying stuff!

 

[reneprays]

@pink1310 Yup haha store’s a store. Just because you normally shop at Whole Foods or sprouts, doesn’t mean there isn’t marketing there too. It’s just beiger and “healthier”

 

[pink1310]

@reneprays I would have to drive 2 hours to a fancy store like that. The idea of Safeway being "lesser" is so dumb to me. It's food! Maybe that mom was loading up on junk for a party, maybe her kid is sick and needs calories, maybe she's buying food for a kid with cancer. Who the heck knows and who the heck cares. It doesn't break my heart to see a mom buying juice or easy snacks for a kid. I just smile and give that friendly commiserating nod. We've all been in the check out line exhausted with the kids screaming for whatever and just zoned out to get back to the car.

 

[reneprays]

@pink1310 I also shop at a regional chain grocery similar to Safeway. There’s a really crappy Whole Foods (like the worst one ever. Don’t get how it’s still open lol) about 25 mins from me and a few more within 30-40 minutes but give me my big grocery store 10 mins away please. They have loads of crap but they’ve also got an amazing organic selection and all the normal stuff too. Like grains and veggies and stuff.

 

[cheesestick]

@reneprays This is so true! You can still buy plenty of crap from those stores, you just pay more for it lol

I joined this sub so I could learn more about realistic swaps I could make for my family, not to bash on other people who don't make the same choices. I also fully recognize I have a huge privilege in even being able to devote my energy to thinking about and purchasing these swaps.

I hate posts like these because the "wokeness" feels so holier than thou and unaware of the privilege they are displaying. We just need to focus on our own families and chill out on constantly judging everyone else for not making the "best" choices. It's overwhelming to think about every choice and the reality is many people don't have the time, money, and/or mental bandwidth to do that.

 

[jaenalyn]

@cheesestick I agree and also I think it’s worth noting that those reasons given in your last paragraph are on purpose.

Too broke, disconnected, and tired to cook, means you’re too tired to politically organize. Too tired to change the status quo.

 

[john_geeshu]

@julia736 Agreed. The mom buying juice that contains vitamin C is doing her best. Most people don't have strong nutritional literacy and it's truly not their fault. Or even if they do, they can't afford healthy, fresh fruits and veggies. Blame corporations, not people.

 

[reneprays]

@john_geeshu Agreed, I consider myself to have pretty good nutritional literacy. I’m great at reading labels after years of veganism and have learned so much about food and ingredients in that time and beyond. But…if we’re on a road trip we do a drive thru. Like, it happens. Sometimes I buy my kid (or myself) a treat that has some crappy ingredients. I cringe thinking there might be another mom watching and judging me.

 

[ladym1977]

@john_geeshu Or has an older kid than OP’s who’s in sports where a sugary fruit juice is a perfectly reasonable choice to hydrate and quickly reup on calories.