Tipping Daycare Teachers

@johnsubira I was a preschool teacher for many years before staying home with my daughter. I worked in the public and private sector. I can tell you that just because you pay expensive tuition does not mean that the teachers are being paid well. Unfortunately, most of your tuition goes towards licensing fees. That being said... I have had parents gift me cash in the past and although it is appreciated, it does feel a bit awkward. I would lean towards individual gifts and putting the money on a gift card. Target and Starbucks is always a favorite where I am at but if they have a favorite store listed then I would go with that. Cash always felt more like a tip for me whereas a gift card felt like an appreciative gift. Another idea is to offer to buy them lunch one day. We had a handful of parents that would ask us where we wanted lunch from, take our order and have it delivered. It would cost less than $50/person and it was always such a nice treat in the middle of our stressful day. Hopefully this helps!
 
@sillyfool Ok thank you for validating my thought lol. When I first read this post I thought it was so strange to call a Christmas gift a “tip.” Teachers are (often licensed) professionals. As such, I would never think to “tip” them, which is very different than a gift in my mind.
 
@bullseye1368 Yes! I know their hearts are in the right place but we do get an hourly wage (however underpaid we are) and when we receive a "tip" it can make us think that we are being given money based off of our care and relationship with the child. Most people who are teaching pour their heart and souls into teaching and taking care of your child and never expect to be tipped for it.
 
@sillyfool Yeah... it sounds really awkward to call it a tip, as if teachers should be motivated to work harder for a child for what amounts to be a few bucks. Or the implication that families that can't afford large 'tips' for teachers should not have their child cared for quite as well. Or that teaching should be considered unskilled labor or a "stepping stone" job and not a profession. Just so much ick here.
 
@ryspi76 Yep, I am a social worker, which is a similarly underpaid field, but I would be so uncomfortable if a client tipped me for my services because it implies a customer service relationship rather than a professional one.
 
@johnsubira Our son's daycare has room parents for each class (I am one) who organize a class gift around the holidays for teachers. The parents committee suggests $20 per teacher (or whatever is comfortable), but the gifts are absolutely voluntary. Parents can contribute as much or as little as they want or give their own gifts instead, if they prefer. Each of our teachers got $200 from the class, plus a few snacks they like.
 
@edit This is what happens at my daughter’s school and we contributed to the collective gift which has not been given yet. But yesterday I sent my daughter to school with our holiday card and a homemade card for both her teachers.

Now I am afraid that I did something wrong by giving her two teachers cards and no gift card since they haven’t received the collective gift yet.

Have I disappointed them or done a faux paux of some kind?
 
@heavenann I don't think so at all! I think giving your own cards (including adorable homemade cards) is a lovely gesture and a nice complement to the class gift. Our previous center didn't do class gifts (or have room parents), so this was all new to us, but when I organize class gifts, I always make sure the teachers know they came from all the parents. I'm sure whoever is handling yours will do the same!
 
@johnsubira This whole thread is wild to me lol. I worked in childcare for 2 years and parents never brought Christmas gifts to anyone. The director bought us all coffee and bagels close to Christmas and said that was our “Christmas bonus” and that was it.
 
@gtdispomed9093 That is surprising and not common at all! I found that even in the low income centers that I worked for I still received a gift from my parents. Even something small or a handwritten note would be appreciated! The boss giving you bagels and coffee as a Christmas bonus can definitely be a reality, especially if you work for a private center. It's unfortunate but they always claim they don't have the funds to do more. I had to move to public school because I couldn't stand all of the unfair inconsistencies.
 
@johnsubira Im shocked at how many people give gifts to staff. I don’t even give family members $50 gifts 😂

Last year we did a handwritten thank you card with a holiday picture of my daughter and she “signed” it with her handprint.
 
@johnsubira I'm just doing $10 amazon gift cards for each of their main teachers and the kids will make them a card which I'll write a note in. Not gonna feel bad, it's not my job to pay their salary. I already spend a fortune on tuition. I literally cannot afford to do more than that. And still the guilt trips to give more and more come from everywhere.
 
@johnsubira In case there's still time to suggest this to your daycare center's admin or room parents - our daycare center's room parents organize a joint gift. Every family donates what they are able. The suggestion is that families make a donation of $40 per child they have in daycare, but they make clear that the goal is to get 100% family participation in the gift, and anything between $5 - $500 is acceptable! The room parents collect the gifts and disburse between all of the daycare teachers equally. They also make clear that this is meant to take the place of individual gifts to teachers.

We have one kiddo in daycare and ended up giving $100, even though there are multiple teachers in his classroom. I am guessing the teachers end up getting a much more meaningful amount this way, AND I think its easier on parents.
 
@johnsubira Yea and I have twins so I feel like it complicates it a bit more.

Last year we did 200 (100 per kid) for the main teachers which were two- 75 for the assistant and then 50 for the afternoon helpers.

This year they got moved up to the next classroom a month ago. So I am looking at like 5 main teachers over the year really and two floaters/aides/. SOoooo I think I am going do 200 for their main teacher from this year, 100 for the the two other mains, then 50 for their new classroom teachers they've just been in that class for like a month. 25 for the afternoon aides.

eta: I also don't consider this 'tipping' which sounds crude in this case. They are my village. This is my Christmas gift to them for taking care and loving my kids thru the year when I have to go to work. They are there to give hugs, teach. give words of encouragement, help with booboos and they are the ones who spend immeasurable time with my children and are a huuuuge part of their lives. Even if its just for this short amount of time. This is my way of showing thanks and hopefully they can buy something fun (or pay a bill) with the gift card.
 
@johnsubira I gift his main teachers (only 1 this year) $75 with a card expressing our gratitude because our child loves her. I then order crumbl cookies for the center itself with an additional note of thanks. Tipping culture is insane here but this relationship is much more personal than the drive-thru barista asking for one. I feel my kid is safe and looked after and we all know even that tuition is expensive - the teachers are taking home a small amount. That said, spend what you can or just a nice card with your thoughts would be great.
 
@johnsubira I usually give his main teachers $20-40 gift cards and usually the floaters and director/assistant I just give a card and some candy. To me this is a Christmas/Holiday present, not a tip. It's a big corporate center, not an individual person so I don't feel it is my responsibility to "tip" or give a gift that would equate to a "holiday bonus" like I might with a nanny or in home daycare. Also FWIW neither of our companies gave bonuses last year, nor do we expect they will this year so not to be tit for tat about it but I think it's light Christmas all around and I think teachers understand that too.
 
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