Son broke up with his girlfriend because she was too “freaky”

[centurionforchrist]

@katrina2017 Stop trying to normalise unfettered access to the internet (i.e. a camera phone connected to the internet…)

There are apps you can install that let you see everything that happens on that phone, and that girls parents are either not interested or just gave her the phone without investigating. Both examples of bad parenting in this day and age.

Or seriously just look at the camera roll/messages, they’re 13

Edit: also I’m willing to bet this is an android or iPhone, which lets be honest, are tiny full computers, they ain’t a camera phone. we ain’t talking Motorola razrs here

 

[swanpslam48]

@centurionforchrist You also have kids that are much smarter then their parents when it comes to devices, and apps that are designed to hide what is happening. You can send photos without even saving them to the device.

Some of it is bad parenting, but let's not pretend that this is only happening to shitty parents.

 

[saylormom]

@katrina2017 I doubt they are using flip camera phones. They have smart phones with social media apps like snapchat.

 

[katrina2017]

@saylormom And I didn't say that they were but it's incredibly difficult to sort this problem, if it wasn't every school on the country wouldn't be struggling with this.
Until kids realise that this is not the norm then we won't see progress

 

[trenton]

@centurionforchrist The fact that it's happening on a weekly basis is a sign that it's normalized. You can deny the reality however much you want, but it is what it is. Two things that make this possible: smartphones, and social media. And both have been normalized for quite some time now.

Is it bad parenting if the parents are not technologically-savvy enough to know how to block apps that make it possible to send pictures? MMS makes this possible BTW, so even basic texting would have to be blocked. Is it good parenting to block your kid from being able to communicate with their friends like all their other friends do?

Is it bad parenting to not know that you can install monitoring apps on your teen's phone? Is it good parenting to monitor every single message that goes through your teen's phone, or is that an invasion of privacy?

 

[centurionforchrist]

@trenton Both have been normalised in adult society (unfortunately), yes. But for 11 year olds? No.

To respond to your questions:

1 - Yes. Don’t buy technology you don’t understand for your kids. You’re the parent, be a parent. No need to block messaging, but monitor it.

2 - Like I mentioned a moment ago - monitor it.

3 - Yes, it’s bad parenting to give your kids a phone in this day and age and not monitor it.

4 - monitor your kids messages. If they’re just fine, give em a bit more freedom and check in every now and then. If they’re sending dick pics to everyone, curb that shit immediately. Whether or not it’s an invasion of privacy depends on the kid. If they’re spraying their dick all over the internet, no it’s not.

Basically, phones and the internet are dangerous. If you’re fine with your kid having unlimited access to something a lot of adults have trouble coping with, well, I hope you know your kid well enough.

 

[siralex172]

@centurionforchrist 1, kids will do it with whatever technology they are given or have access to. Schools anymore send kids home with laptops or tablets, and I guarantee they all have cameras.

2, you must not be a parent yourself. You can only monitor them so long. You have to sleep at some point.

3, see 1 And 2. They don’t need phones to do this.

4, By the time you see the messages, it’s already too late. As said before, it’ll be hard to monitor their school tablets and such if you don’t have access to them

 

[dechen]

@centurionforchrist That doesn't matter any sense. How could bad parenting be normalized but bed behavior isn't?

 

[centurionforchrist]

@dechen Parents let their kids use phones with impunity. Anything goes, the kid’s quiet, great. This is bad. That leads to bad behaviour, like getting sexualised on TikTok and sending everyone dick pics

 

[jessielove]

@centurionforchrist Yes, every misbehavior from teenagers is always only due to bad parenting. It's as simple as that.

 

[centurionforchrist]

@jessielove We’re talking about 11 year olds, dude. How tf did that kid get sexualised under a good parents watch?

 

[hulters]

@centurionforchrist Shit friends, shit school, shit parents. But yeah, her parents need to have a more active role in her life, but they probably just gave her a phone and unfettered Internet access and said "oh well, kids these days..."

 

[berra]

@jaxsn I feel sorry for the girl. A 13 year old girl doing these things is desperate for attention it is not getting anywhere else.

Good for you boy though. He knows whats up.

 

[kalyfe]

@berra A 13 year old girl doing this is one of the most overt signs of sexual abuse

 

[berra]

@kalyfe Yes I thought about that but I didnt want to imply this without knowing the detailled circumstances.

 

[ticketsite]

@berra Yet another reason I love this sub. Anywhere else on reddit, it’s straight to 100% confidence in the worst possible outcome being the only one.

Wife didn’t tell you she bought a donut and didn’t get you one? Huge violation of trust. What else could she be hiding? I’m sure she’s cheating, better get a divorce.

 

[kalyfe]

@ticketsite Big difference between the bullshit on on other subs and behavior that is clearly a sign of abuse. I'm not saying to go nuclear, I'm saying let a mandatory reporter know so they can pull the right levers

 

[ticketsite]

@kalyfe Yeah, and to be sure, I’m not saying this is not a sign of abuse or that OP shouldn’t consider the situation in that light and report it if they find it appropriate. But it’s that moderation in the face of understanding we don’t have all the facts from one post that I appreciate.

 

[olag]

@kalyfe Man, I have a 9 year old daughter and the very thought of her being so desperate for attention to do this in merely 4 years crushes me as a dad. I can't imagine a world where she would do it, but I think that's because my wife and I have created an environment where she has high self-esteem and personal satisfaction in her hobbies and friendships.

 

[rme09]

@olag Any tips that you can pass on?