grammyjean
New member
I honestly can’t believe I even have to ask this lol
But here’s the situation...
My girlfriend (26) has a child (2) and lives at home with her parents. She feels the need to tell me that she is an independent woman that doesn’t need a man and we argue because I respond back with if your so independent and don’t need a man then why don’t you move out of the mans (her father) house you live in. She shoots back with because it’s a blessing that I have a father that will support me to allow me to live in his house still. And I say okay so your father supports you that mean you depend on him for a place to stay, you not independent in this aspect, but I believe you can do it on your own. Then she fires back with no I can’t I’m both parents I can’t do it all on my own. And it seems to go around in circles as such.
But she tells me I should get a better job or another job n move her n her child into a 2 bedroom place. And I respond back with why do I need to do that, that’s just shifting your dependence from your father to me, you can do these things you can do more or better so that you can support yourself. And then she freaks out saying stuff like the man is supposed to support me and my child. So then I respond with okay so if a man is supposed to do that for you how can you claim to be independent? And then again round in circles we go.
Now additional info..
She works part time.
She doesn’t not receive child support or govt assistances.
As far to my knowledge, she only pays for her car note, cell phone bill, gas for her car, and day care and needs (food, diapers, etc) for her child and maybe a few small extra stuff that you wouldn’t need to survive.
She can’t really cook anything that involves a certain skill set, like she can microwave things and make simple pasta on the stove but idk if like she could cook like a meatloaf without help or something like that.
Her dad cooks most of the meals.
She does as much as she can for her child and I respect that.
When she falls short her parents will help her or I may give her some money to help her make it to her next pay check or buy her child diapers and stuff of that nature.
Her dad pays the rent and possibly all the other utilities idk if her mom help but it’s certainly possible.
I work full time.
I pay my rent, utilities, cable, cellphone, gas for my car, food in my apartment, and some small extra bills like online play for my PS4 or Netflix type things.
I live alone in a 1 bedroom.
This for some reason is causing us issues. I tell her she can do these things n she gets mad n says she can’t n that I shouldn’t tell her what she can n cannot do.
I’ve run out of options that don’t lead us to arguing and I’ve decided that me and her need some space and that we should take a break.
Do you think she independent? Am I doing anything wrong here by thinking she can do things that will make her life easier? How should I handle this issue in our relationship? Can anyone offer me unbiased criticism or constructive criticism? Should I talk to her parents to maybe help get through to her?
But here’s the situation...
My girlfriend (26) has a child (2) and lives at home with her parents. She feels the need to tell me that she is an independent woman that doesn’t need a man and we argue because I respond back with if your so independent and don’t need a man then why don’t you move out of the mans (her father) house you live in. She shoots back with because it’s a blessing that I have a father that will support me to allow me to live in his house still. And I say okay so your father supports you that mean you depend on him for a place to stay, you not independent in this aspect, but I believe you can do it on your own. Then she fires back with no I can’t I’m both parents I can’t do it all on my own. And it seems to go around in circles as such.
But she tells me I should get a better job or another job n move her n her child into a 2 bedroom place. And I respond back with why do I need to do that, that’s just shifting your dependence from your father to me, you can do these things you can do more or better so that you can support yourself. And then she freaks out saying stuff like the man is supposed to support me and my child. So then I respond with okay so if a man is supposed to do that for you how can you claim to be independent? And then again round in circles we go.
Now additional info..
She works part time.
She doesn’t not receive child support or govt assistances.
As far to my knowledge, she only pays for her car note, cell phone bill, gas for her car, and day care and needs (food, diapers, etc) for her child and maybe a few small extra stuff that you wouldn’t need to survive.
She can’t really cook anything that involves a certain skill set, like she can microwave things and make simple pasta on the stove but idk if like she could cook like a meatloaf without help or something like that.
Her dad cooks most of the meals.
She does as much as she can for her child and I respect that.
When she falls short her parents will help her or I may give her some money to help her make it to her next pay check or buy her child diapers and stuff of that nature.
Her dad pays the rent and possibly all the other utilities idk if her mom help but it’s certainly possible.
I work full time.
I pay my rent, utilities, cable, cellphone, gas for my car, food in my apartment, and some small extra bills like online play for my PS4 or Netflix type things.
I live alone in a 1 bedroom.
This for some reason is causing us issues. I tell her she can do these things n she gets mad n says she can’t n that I shouldn’t tell her what she can n cannot do.
I’ve run out of options that don’t lead us to arguing and I’ve decided that me and her need some space and that we should take a break.
Do you think she independent? Am I doing anything wrong here by thinking she can do things that will make her life easier? How should I handle this issue in our relationship? Can anyone offer me unbiased criticism or constructive criticism? Should I talk to her parents to maybe help get through to her?