@chillcwill I currently have three in daycare- 4yo and 1yo twins. We’re about 8 months into it and have 1.5 years to go before the oldest starts kindergarten.
It’s expensive and drop off/pickup requires a stroller but it’s doable.
@chillcwill You're comparing it against the wrong thing. You are receiving financial benefits above and beyond your salary -- health insurance (some of which is probably covered by your employer), 401k matching, whatever other benefits there are.
You don't say what your job is. There are not many professional jobs where you can step out for a year and step right back in. It's likely that you would have to take a lower job when you return, which would lower your income for the rest of your working life. The financial cost of stepping out could be hundreds of thousands of dollars, in the long run.
Another option you could consider, if your home is large enough for it, would be an au pair. It might be cheaper than full day daycare for three children.
@chillcwill I think 8-9 months is so short that I’d better eat the cost. Alternatively you may look for a nanny as with 3 kids or may end up cheaper (depends a lot on the area, daycare rate, nanny rate)
Will insurance cost change? Will your 401k contribution drop?
@sherlockpwns No both of those things will hold steady. We’ll basically stop contributing to our savings account which is already fully funded in case of emergency.
@chillcwill Something to consider too is the cost of childcare once your oldest starts school. A 1 year gap year could end up needing to last longer because afterschool programs cost nearly as much as childcare for a toddler. Many look forward to their oldest starting school, only to find out that with school break camps and after care, they spend nearly as much as full time care. We are fortunate that our public school offers free before and after school care and some school break camps.
@confiteor I wish I had more experience/knowledge about what our costs/child care needs will be once the oldest is in school. Would be nice if our school district would switch to full day kindergarten by 2025
@chillcwill I looked around at all the nearby school districts. I read their parent handbooks that were posted online. I was able to find one that offered before school care starting at 6.30AM and after school care going until 6:30 PM. It's free. We were able to get a transfer to the nearby district. Others had paid programs with much shorter hours, or did half day kinder. And "full day" for schools is often something like 8:30-2 or 2:30, so we still need the after school care.
I also work in public education, so I knew who to ask.
@chillcwill We had a single and then twins. We had 3 in daycare for 3 years. It was very difficult financially, but I'm glad I didn't drop an atom bomb on my career by staying home. Also, I would have been miserable as a SAHM. It's just not for me.
@chillcwill We will have 3 under 3 starting in February. We go to one of the nicest daycares in our area and it will still be cheaper than a nanny who is qualified & willing to watch these kids. To each their own but my decisions against gap year would be:
gap year affects your career, even if you can get your same position. This includes your retirement savings and future promotions or raises. It's better financially to stay at work.
the older kids, assuming they like daycare at all (ours sure do), will really prefer and thrive on keeping their normal routine.
watching 3 young kids by yourself every day all day would be really fucking hard. The babies are one kind of stress but then also keeping a toddler entertained, educated, and happy is a crazy amount of work.
lots of families at daycare have 3. They all seem to handle drop off/pick up differently but it always seems to work. My husband and I will be figuring out (and have been practicing) how to get all 3 out to the car safely in 1 trip but I do see families who bring 1 or 2 out, buckle them in, and then go get the remaining 1 or 2.
For my husband and I we prefer the method of get them all in one trip, deposit them all in the car so they're not running around the parking lot, and then buckle them all in in an order that makes sense. My toddler actually is a big helper and likes to push the baby stroller, which frees up arms for 3rd baby carrying.
@chillcwill I had 3 children in daycare from just May to August, but then 2 kids in daycare and one in a before and after care setting after that. It did cost more than my husband’s take-home pay. But 1) his talents do NOT lie in providing early education to small, needy children 2) his company has a low turnover with great benefits as you gain seniority — so we did not want him to lose his position, so it made way more sense for him to stay.
In the scheme of life, we survived. It was exhausting, expensive, but worth it…
