People who “diagnose” themselves with fertility issues before they even start trying

[s3anreilly]

@pdj I was saying it's confirmation bias. Because even having PCOS does not mean infertility for the majority of people with PCOS. I also had the same valid concerns and ended up with a PCOS diagnosis.. but that's not causing our infertility at all.
Saying I had this feeling and look out turned out true would be confirmation bias. The bumper forums are full with people who thought they might have issues conceiving wether based on actual symptoms or a diagnosis or just a general fear. The people who are still here are still here because it didn't work out.
I am totally for sharing knowledge and personally that's what I do a lot, and that's what I like about still being in TFAB. But then people have to actually listen to it. Look at this while thread it's full of people with confirmation bias. Then there are quite a few people who say I am what OP is venting about, but when I do it is okay because xys. But then don't listen to others that tell them how that is insensitive.
And you also did also not reflect on what your friends told you, what you did was like expressing lot of fear surrounding a mole in a conversation where other people were discussing their cancer treatment. It's just not the place. You should have listened and then taken it to the doctor.
It's also not the responsibility of people with infertility to educate others.

 

[pdj]

@s3anreilly I think this is where we differ. I have had an infertility diagnosis (due to my PCOS symptoms, I’m aware not everyone with PCOS experiences the same symptoms and deals with infertility), and I do feel like it’s my responsibility to bring attention to it and share my experience, as it may help someone else. Infertility shouldn’t be treated like an exclusive club where we only talk to each other about our problems, and complain about everyone else and how they don’t understand. They don’t understand because they quite literally don’t know. I can’t stand when people make insensitive comments, but they really don’t understand unless you make them part of the conversation (most, some are just jerks). You seem to be making a lot of incorrect assumptions about how my conversation with friends went—I’m certainly not defending everyone or making excuses for myself, just giving a perspective that some people have concerning symptoms and maybe we shouldn’t discount everyone who wants to be part of the conversation, but doesn’t yet have a diagnosis.

 

[s3anreilly]

@pdj

To be fair, I assumed I would have fertility issues because of all the problems I had with my period from the time it started. I always knew something was wrong (it was PCOS, undiagnosed for 20 years). I remember mentioning my assumption in a group of friends, of which two were discussing their fertility treatments, and got a verbal slap in the face about how I shouldn’t say that and I was wrong and didn’t understand.

It's pretty clear. You assumed fertility issues, mentioned your assumptions while they were discussing fertility treatments, got a verbal slap in the face. You can't just assume that. Irregular cycles can still be ovulatory. Which you don't know until it's investigated. Concerns is not the same as assumptions and you specifically said assumption.