OAD with no daycare?

[samolub]

Hi all. I know daycare in general is a hot topic right now. Whether to send the kids back, whether to stay enrolled, etc. I’m mom to an 8 mo and our intention was that I stay home with her for 7 months and then my mom would watch her and we’d evaluate if we wanted to put her in daycare at some point down the line after her 1st birthday. Well I stayed home for 7 months but I’m still home due to covid. I work remotely now. My mom just recently started coming over on occasion to help out and it’s great being with her while she’s a baby. I have some anxiety about what the affects of her not being in daycare would be. Like I know there should be some SAHPs out there that also were OAD? Or just had a nanny for an only? Or had family provide childcare in the early years?

I’m in search of experiences from those that are OAD that didn’t send their children to daycare or another type of early education facility. Did you regret it, was it great, what were the pros and cons?

I stayed with family primarily as a little one, no real daycare and I feel I panned out well socially and intelligence wise. I wasn’t behind and always scored and graded well throughout school. I was shy when I went to pre k but I definitely got over it. But anyhow, what are your experiences?

 

[nebula1]

@samolub My daughter will be 3 in Sept and I've been at home with her the whole time. It's hard at times but I think in the US where I am there is such pressure on schooling and being extroverted. there will be time for making best friends and learning to count to 100.

Read to your child everyday, talk to them about what you are doing and why, and teach them They will be fine! And do daycare when you want or no longer can do full-time child care.

 

[samolub]

@nebula1 Thanks for this

 

[kevintri99]

@samolub My parents weren’t OAD but they sent my younger brother to daycare and kept me home (basically sent us both to school at the same time, I just happened to be 5 at the time and he was 2). I’d say I was definitely the one who did better in school and better socially, etc. Although he got it together as an adult he struggled for a while. So yeah, early childhood Ed doesn’t mean much for how kids turn out. in fact my mom was really pissed at his first daycare because the lady basically just had the TV on all day and didn’t watch the kids.

I personally am OAD and my child is home with me. She’s only 19 months right now, and if COVID ever goes away I will consider putting her in some sort of preK later on but would like to avoid daycare.

 

[jjlynn]

@samolub My son is only 19 months old. He has never gone to.daycare. we don't plan on sending him until he is over 2. I was worried he would be anti social and would be shy but its been the opposite. He is super outgoing and plays with other friends kids with no problems. I am a child with three siblings and I am super shy, not social and an introvert, i was in daycare at three months old. A big pro is obviously money and then that we get to see our son go through some big milestone we would most likely miss otherwise. To help with socialization we go to swimming once a week (before covid) and try meet with friends and kids when possible. I am so happy we have opportunity to stay home with him. When needed and safe our family is willing to take him if we need to be the office etc.

 

[samolub]

@jjlynn Thanks for your perspective!

 

[katrina2017]

@samolub I used to work at a daycare. I’m sure there are great ones out there but just make sure to research a lot before sending your kid to one because the one I worked at was the worst place I ever worked.

Nannies often are less expensive than daycares (source: I am currently a nanny) and it’s a lot easier to make sure your kid will be safe. I wouldn’t be worried about your kid being socially behind if they don’t go to daycare, my only child friend wasn’t in daycare and she’s the most extroverted person I know. I didn’t go to daycare but I grew up around a giant family and I was very shy when I started school. I think it comes down to personality more than whether or not someone went to daycare.

 

[nw82]

@katrina2017 Are you paid under the table? Where is a nanny cheaper than daycare for one child?? Maybe a nanny-share, but once you factor in nanny taxes it’s absolutely not cheaper (and my kid goes to a pricey daycare so this isn’t comparing a crappy daycare with a nanny).

 

[erbush1988]

@samolub If you can find an absolutely wonderful daycare, I think it’s worth it. My kiddo was in daycare starting at 10 weeks old (that was totally not the plan, but had to secure a spot and my husband was laid off two weeks before I gave birth, soooo...back to work I went!). I missed the kid like crazy and it was very hard, BUT I absolutely trusted the daycare and so I wasn’t worrying about the kid as much as missing her.

Short-term, having family watch the kid while you work from home sounds great. Long-term you may want a nanny so there is more of a business relationship.

You should also consider your commute—my kid’s daycare was literally across the street from my office, so it was easy to pick her up if she needed to go home early, etc.

 

[amarriedmess]

@samolub I’m 26, with a 7 year old girl and I stayed home with her and I don’t regret it. Especially knowing now that I’m OAD. I just stayed home because it didn’t make sense to work with how expensive daycare is.

 

[tang0]

@samolub I only had one and she was always in daycare. She’s a teen now, so it was a while ago. It was beat for her-she loved daycare. If she was young now with COVID, I would keep her home if possible.