How do I tell my husband to have a little more empathy for me as a sahm?

cliffco

New member
Recently he was upset that I forgot to wash his uniform for work. I’ve been exhausted because my 1 year old is teething and suckling all night and my 2 year old is hyper af.

So I forgot to wash his clothes the night before. I woke up at 5 am and the pants he did have clean had a hole in them. So sewed them up, washed his under shirt by hand and made him lunch while he got ready.

Later that day he said he was annoyed because I almost made him late because I don’t use my time wisely at home. This made me upset because he thinks I’m relaxing at home all day. Not realizing I’m on the clock 24/7 and hardly sleeping. And somehow he claims he sleeps less than I do.

This really upsets me because this is like the 100th time I’ve had to explain to him that I’m doing my best and I can’t always get things done like a stepford wife.
 
@lostandinsecure Absolutely! My partner does a lot of the wash and all the folding. He knows I can’t get anything folded with a toddler around. He usually does it after the kids and I go to sleep. Have him try to so a few loads of laundry with your toddlers and see how it goes.
 
@cliffco Response: I’ll take care of the kids and house, the least you can do is keep yourself and clothes cleaned and also feed yourself. If he wants a mother, tell him to live with her.
 
@rachane He wants a mother who he can verbally and emotionally abuse, have sex with, and then ignore when he’s doing his own thing, I’m sure. I’ve read this story 10000 times sadly.
 
@cliffco Pick a day he's home from work and leave for the whole day and let him see what it's really like to be home all day with two small children. Repeat as often as necessary for him to understand that being home is not a vacation.

He's a grown man, he is perfectly capable of washing his own work clothes and packing his own lunch, he needs to be a partner not another child.
 
@asing I remember that unpopular opinion posts where the man said staying home with kids and getting everything done was easy and I just scratched my head like, I know he just plopped those kids infront of a screen for 10 hours and fed them fish crackers for breakfast lunch and dinner.
 
@annetteaa You forgot to add the part where they also somehow get to feel zero guilt about this behavior???? Like they do not sit up at night after babe is asleep thinking… man I really should have fed them pretzels and some berries that third time around instead of just goldfish.
 
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