Don’t expect your babies to do things they haven’t been shown

[humanist0624]

@katrina2017 This is exactly what parents are supposed to be doing instead of baby talk. Language acquisition begins in utero, so it's never too early to speak in full sentences and even explain/demonstrate various concepts to them. Even if you don't think they'll understand it, simply being exposed to it means they'll pick it up a lot faster.

I was a stay-at-home parent with an only child, so I was right there explaining various things about the world from the get-go just like you guys, and as a result she was also an early talker with a big vocabulary. Her doctor was my doctor when I was a kid, which tells you how long he's been a family physician lol, and he said she's one of the most articulate children he's ever met. I really think that besides building a healthy social/emotional foundation, this is the most important thing to do for your child - and it goes hand in hand with everything else since children need words to express their emotions or social conflicts or what have you.

 

[cph]

@humanist0624 Someone else on here gave me that advice and whenever I’m reading any book now I sit her on my lap and read out loud. She’s had a few football or soccer player to most of you biographies read to her so far, she’s well aware of the troubles Jordan Henderson faced earlier in his career and how modern football has improved within the last 10 years .

I now have to think about this a little more and make sure I’m not doing it with ex soldiers books and New York mobsters life stories which have been staples of my reading picks in the last few years.

 

[asenath]

@cph A few weeks ago I taught my 4yo about thumbs up is yes and thumbs down is no. He does it constantly now

 

[freedbygrace]

@asenath As an occasional sound engineer, I disapprove. ;-)

 

[ceasarjc]

@asenath My almost 5 yo is now playing chess on a level that challenges me. I don’t know wether to be proud or ashamed.

 

[adam4922]

@cph I agree, but then that soon flips and then you scratch your head and wonder how they learnt or knew that.

 

[tthompso1n]

@adam4922 Baby’s first f-bomb!

 

[freedbygrace]

@tthompso1n No…I know where she got that…

 

[sneha123]

@tthompso1n Unfortunately I'm pretty sure I know how they learned that one.

Im usually pretty good but it's definitely from me.

 

[shinered]

@cph This is invaluable advice. Especially considering ASQ III is used by doctors and social workers to assess development. If a test is done and the child is unsuccessful, it's important to consider why and ask yourself "what is the test trying to assess"?

 

[bigjake52]

@shinered Exactly. My wife was concerned for our son and had him evaluated. They said he was behind in “abclmno”. My wife see I knew it, but I was trying to tell her “but these are things we haven’t been doing with him.” These are our shortcomings with him, not his. Though I am glad we had him evaluated and someone who specializes in early childhood development goes to the daycare weekly and spends an hour with him.

Figure the larger his “village” is the better off he will be.

 

[shinered]

@bigjake52

These are our shortcomings with him,

Except this. These aren't shortcomings. They are points of observation. They are meant to help clinicians see particular parts of brain and body development. The skills themselves aren't important. For instance, clapping isn't important. It is the ability to have both hands meet "mid-line." Child development ebbs and flows; sometimes (and someways) they are ahead, sometimes behind.

It's when a child is consistently not reaching milestones that a clinician might decide to investigate further to make sure there isn't another cause.

I guess what I am really driving at here is to say that these things should never be seen as a moral failing.

 

[bigjake52]

@shinered Thank you. Appreciate the clarification.

 

[trygveb]

@cph Unless it's dangerous. Then they'll come up with the idea all on their own. "Maybe if I stack all my toys on top of each other, I can see what's hidden on that counter-top!"

 

[dannywindsofchange]

@cph Heh, tittle

 

[skcovin]

@cph As an idiot that this wasn't taught to teach them to do...thank you.

 

[maximos]

@cph With my first she started with lots of wake ups in the night, obviously, and then by 3 months had learned to only wake once for a feed. I assumed she would then wean herself off that feed in a month or so. At 7 months she was still waking. It took some googling to realize I had to wean her, she was waking because she was expecting food. Took about a week and then she was sleeping through the night. I couldn’t believe how stupid I was!

 

[anon565]

@cph Our toddler learned saying okay instead of yes/yea. Thought it was really weird that he just doesn’t use yes for affirmation. Turned out I am saying okay all the time…

 

[dutonial]

@anon565 My kid also knows okay instead of yes, what really entertained me was that we went right to Nokay for a negative response. Adorable.

 

[samsoneagle]

@anon565 Recently had this with my daughter. She says “thank you so much” instead of just thank you. I wondered where she picked this up until I realized I say thank you so much just about every time.