Breaking great-grandma’s heart for not letting baby CIO

[bigskyguy76]

@elimatt She does have horrible reflux, and I think this is a big part of her car seat problem!

 

[keepingsteady]

@bigskyguy76 my baby was just like this. he rode home naked so many times from crying so hard he choked and vomited. it’s heartbreaking and HARD. hang in there. it will get better with time.

that being said, we skipped out on some things and made the trek for others. he would surprise us sometimes! i’m not anti-screen time so he was very aware of Ms Rachel and i could play her songs in the car to keep him calm-ish. we would also stop a lot to nurse on hour+ car rides. do whatever is in your heart to do. i know it sucks to miss out on so much.

 

[h2014]

@bigskyguy76 Mama, listen. You are a loving parent who knows what’s best for your child. I also have a child who did/sometimes still does this EXACT same thing. It is in our nature to want to keep our babies out of situations like this one until they are ready. You are not being overprotective or selfish - you are reacting how I would honestly hope any mom would.

 

[euthymios]

@bigskyguy76 The family are just as capable of driving as you are, and it’s far easier to drive without a baby screaming in the backseat. If they can’t be bothered to make the effort, that’s their issue.

 

[karryme]

@bigskyguy76 We had a similar infant, no hyperventilating though. It really helped to have car toys. All the really annoying musical ones. We have a leap frog dog, a leap frog phone, a couple other noisy toys. They were only for the car. We had to make a 12 hr trip at 9 months for a funeral. It was rough, but the toys helped. When the toys wouldn’t distract we put on Ms. Rachel on a phone. I’m not saying you have to make this trip, but if it’s something that you want to do, that’s what helped us. We also made frequent stops. Like sometimes every 20 minutes. Another thing that helped was getting a different style of car seat. But also, if you don’t go, you will be less exposed to all the ick that’s going around right now. You are not obligated to make your child uncomfortable for anyone.

 

[bigskyguy76]

@karryme Ugh my baby’s already fighting her first cold, I don’t want to expose her to even more illnesses I didn’t even mention this concern to my mom because the response is always, “you can’t keep her in a bubble, how else will she build an immune system?”

 

[wrshamblinjr]

@bigskyguy76 Is it possible to fly? My baby doesn’t like the car seat but is a great traveller when flying!

 

[lmkuhn76]

@bigskyguy76 I think it's better to find a solve. At this age, some pouches, songs, toys even your phone can help. Or try to time it w a long nap there and long nap back. It's hard but making am 85yo woman drive isn't the answer. And it's true, there is little time left for these things. The baby will be ok

 

[sanjose1982]

@bigskyguy76 Ugh I feel you. My kid was like this at 8 months and it was so so hard. No you can’t just let baby scream for that long, it will be awful for you and for baby. What worked for us was getting a pile of 6 ish toys, each would distract her for 5-10 mins and then we would rotate. The baby Einstein “take along tunes” toy and a crinkle book were her faves. And then secondly, Ms Rachel. I was adamant we were going to do screen time that young. But we had an hour drive to see family right around 9 months and I was desperate. Ms Rachel kept my baby from screaming. Now at 18 months she still thinks Ms Rachel/the iPad only live in the car, which works for us. At 18 months we also have success w snacks and books but those won’t be helpful to you for a bit.

 

[bigskyguy76]

@sanjose1982 Rotating toys definitely helps for a bit, but she eventually reaches a point where nothing will distract or calm her. She’ll just close her eyes and scream We haven’t tried snacks though, maybe I’ll get some puffs or yogurt melts to try!

 

[petercm]

@bigskyguy76 Any chance you can take a bus or train instead? That's what we did when our kid screamed in the car, though this will obviously depend on the availability of transit where you live.

We'd take a travel car seat (Cosco Scenera) and strap it to a rolling suitcase containing all his diapers, bibs, changes of clothes, etc. Then we'd babywear and walk around to keep him calm. When we arrived at the destination station, we'd get a ride to the relative's house. So we only needed to manage his crying for that last 10-20 minutes instead of the full 3-4 hours.

He got a lot better around 18 months, for what it's worth.

 

[bigskyguy76]

@petercm We live in rural Minnesota so no public transport unfortunately. Fingers crossed ours gets better at 18 months too!

 

[petercm]

@bigskyguy76 I think sometimes older generations don't understand how babies could hate the car because they remember their kids loving it. But older car seats were so different -- much roomier.

My mom didn't believe me about how bad it was until she sat in the backseat and tried to entertain my baby while I drove. If you do decide to do the trip in the end, it could at least save you a lot of arguments for the next several months.

 

[new17beginning]

@bigskyguy76 Do you have a mirror in the back so baby can see herself and you?

 

[bigskyguy76]

@new17beginning Yes, and I sit with her in the back while my husband drives.

 

[maximoneece]

@bigskyguy76 Can someone drive while you sit in back with baby? It made all the difference* when mine was upset by drives