ashleigh_60
New member
@pentie2003 as a mum to a 5 month old girl that’s bigger than most 9 month olds, i completely understand how annoying the size comments can be lol
Annoying comments about my son being small
- Thread starter pentie2003
- Start date
@pentie2003 My first child was 6.5 lbs, born at 37 weeks via failed induction and emergency c-section. He’s 5, and in the 5th percentile for height and always has been. Sometimes l’ll say something stupid to make people feel awkward about their comments on his height. Something like “what? You don’t think Mr.ToneZone is the father?” But my go-to line is “isn’t it great? We’ll always be able to find him in class photos, since he’ll be holding the sign!” It is what it is. I don’t have the bandwidth to care what other people think. I’m sure your child is perfect!
@pentie2003 My son was a preemie and has 2 boy cousins that are 2 months older and 2 months younger than him. The mom of the older one never brought us the size differences between them bc she could tell how scared I was of him being so tiny even though he was born so early. The mom of the younger one constantly sent me her sons stats and asked for my sons as well. I just ignored those messages from her but they bothered me so much. Mom of the older cousin always told me the kids are the sizes they are. We have no control just let them be. If the dr raises a concern then we figure out what to do but until then we live and ignore peoples weird obsession with comparing kids. I flat out ignore people's comments and won't respond even in person if they don't take the hint and keep pushing I say he's perfect for him we're not worried.
@pentie2003 Your son will get there, don't let them get to you. I know because I've heard all my life how small and thin I was when I was a child. Yes, i was very small and thin but because genetics... My mom was very small and thin too... And now my daughter that is 2 she IS SMALL AND THIN. (Surprised Pikachu face). My mom is 5'7", I'm 5'1" because my dad is smaller than my mom no matter how much he denies it lol. My husband is 6"1"...so, I know my daughter is going to get taller once she will be a teenager.
@pentie2003 My son is 3 and has always been small for his age. He’s in the 3rd percentile, so can’t get much smaller lol he gets mistaken for a twin with his 1 year old brother often because they are about the same height.
We went for lots of tests because of this as doctors were worried he wasn’t growing properly. Finally we met with an endocrinologist, and they needed a bunch of background info from us including when my husband and I and our parents/siblings went through puberty and our heights and a bunch of other info and the way they explained everything to us was really helpful.
So they can scan the bones in your hand and even though you’re say 35, your “bone age” might only be 25. Or vice versa, your bone age might be 45. People with a younger bone age are people who would have gone through puberty later because their body didn’t think it was old enough to go through puberty until later in life whereas someone who went through puberty earlier, their body might think they are older than they actually are. My husband and I both went through puberty much later than our friends.
So likely our son will be the same way. Even though he’s 3 now, his body might think he’s only 1.5 or 2. It’s doesn’t mean he will be short when he’s fully grown, it might just take him longer than his peers to get to his final height.
Whenever someone comments on how short he is, I always just say something like “so?” Or “why does that matter?” And it’s very entertaining watching them stumble over their words trying to explain that it doesn’t matter. You could also say “ya he wants to be an astronaut so he can’t be too tall”
We just want to teach our son that height doesn’t matter so we don’t let people’s comments get to us and we will be teaching him to not let it bother him
We went for lots of tests because of this as doctors were worried he wasn’t growing properly. Finally we met with an endocrinologist, and they needed a bunch of background info from us including when my husband and I and our parents/siblings went through puberty and our heights and a bunch of other info and the way they explained everything to us was really helpful.
So they can scan the bones in your hand and even though you’re say 35, your “bone age” might only be 25. Or vice versa, your bone age might be 45. People with a younger bone age are people who would have gone through puberty later because their body didn’t think it was old enough to go through puberty until later in life whereas someone who went through puberty earlier, their body might think they are older than they actually are. My husband and I both went through puberty much later than our friends.
So likely our son will be the same way. Even though he’s 3 now, his body might think he’s only 1.5 or 2. It’s doesn’t mean he will be short when he’s fully grown, it might just take him longer than his peers to get to his final height.
Whenever someone comments on how short he is, I always just say something like “so?” Or “why does that matter?” And it’s very entertaining watching them stumble over their words trying to explain that it doesn’t matter. You could also say “ya he wants to be an astronaut so he can’t be too tall”
We just want to teach our son that height doesn’t matter so we don’t let people’s comments get to us and we will be teaching him to not let it bother him
katrina2017
New member
@pentie2003 “Before we talk about how small my son is, let’s discuss how big you are”
pentie2003
New member
@pentie2003 My nephew always was short for his age. At 4 years age, he was diagnosed with celiac disease. When they are this small, it's difficult to figure out pathologic symptoms. He had to throw up often and had a bloated stomach most of the time. But until the diagnosis, it was blamed on him eating too much. ... but... well I guess, there are also just smaller kids, without anything wrong about them, that's probably even more likely. Don't let their " narrow mindedness" get to you. Comparing kids like this is very unhealthy and unnecessary. If you can, try to ignore it.
katrina2017
New member
@pentie2003 I wish I had advice that I could give you but I just want to stand in solidarity. I have a friend who has extremely small children. Her 2-year-old only just started wearing 12-month clothes this week and was 4 pounds when he was born. His 5-year-old brother wears a 2T. My friend is constantly comparing her kids’ size to my toddler’s size and it bothers me because the way she talks makes me feel like my child is some kind of a gigantic monster. Things like “wow, my son just turned 5 and he’s wearing smaller clothes than your 2-year-old, I can’t believe how big your little boy is! He must eat so much!” He’s 2 and a half and is 36 pounds and 40 inches tall. I am the shorty in my family at 5’8 and my husband is 6 feet. My mom, nana, and aunties are all 5’10 or taller. My papa, dad, and uncles are all 6 feet or taller. I come from a family of big people. It’s in his DNA. I’d love for her to stop talking about the difference in our toddler’s size. She and her husband are both more than an entire head shorter than I am - of course they’re going to be smaller!!! SHUT THE FORK UP!!!!
katrina2017
New member
@pentie2003 You better start leading with your pinky. Tell whoever if they say another word about your child or his height, you’ll show them why they shouldn’t.
pentie2003
New member
@katrina2017 Oooh i love this
blueclay22
New member
@pentie2003 Ahh I love small toddlers, I guess a lot of ppl are saying it to point out how cute he is.
My kid has the opposite, he's huge. So when I see his agemates that are small I fall in love with them a little bit.
My kid has the opposite, he's huge. So when I see his agemates that are small I fall in love with them a little bit.
xb3li3v3rx
New member
@pentie2003 My littlest is very tall. My boys are 18 months apart but almost same height. My oldest isn’t short though he is 75th percentile my youngest is just off the charts. People ask if they are twins all the time. I would just say yep that’s genetics for you, no 2 kids the same. If it really troubles you say please don’t compare my son.
@pentie2003 People who comment on babies and children are weird. That’s what I would tell myself. Also 6 months apart at the infant stage is a pretty big deal so they sound pretty unintelligent for that one. There’s also no way to predict how he’s going to grow so I wouldn’t worry about it. Anyone judging him based on his size isn’t someone I would consider worth having around. It’s just rude and none of their concern.
elliebaillie92
New member
@pentie2003 My husband and I are both tiny (he's 5'3, I'm 5'0), and our son is small, too. We always say, "Yeah, he's going to CRUSH Baby Ninja Warrior!" or "We're not sure yet if we're going to let him do gymnastics." There's nothing wrong with being small!
diogenes_dog
New member
@pentie2003 I always think small means cute. My son was 6 weeks early. He was almost 5 pounds. I remember walking though Costco with him when he was 6 or 7 months old and a little girl pointed and said mom that baby is too little. I just laughed cuz the doctors all say he's average height and weight although a skinny Minnie for sure. Trying to fatten him up.
@pentie2003 A relative baby was born at the same time as a friend baby. Relative baby was tiny, hardly grew, health issues, hard family life. Friend baby was huge, predicted for great things, yadda yadda. Relative baby is now small but in university and doing ok. Relative baby is piling on weight and not doing much
johnnyhudson
New member
@pentie2003 I struggled a lot when my kid was born, until he was like 1.5 because of his size. Him not growing was constantly on my mind, my milk production never was very good, we had to supplement, blah blah blah. He's an okay eater now, but it's never easy either.
One of our neighbors has a kid that's a year younger and taller and heavier than my guy. Basically since they were 1 and 2. He's almost 4 now. It's hard to see. Friends commenting on it.
But you know what: since the beginning he's been on the 25th percentile for weight and 40th percentile for height, every time he has been measured. (And trust me, that first year, I weighed him a LOT!) That's just how he is. If he looks small to other people you have to learn to not let those comments bother you. It's a hard lesson, but take solace in knowing he's on his growth curve and that's good enough.
Some old grannies either have a distorted view of how a normal toddler should look. Let's be real, with half of the population obese in the US standards are skewed. And the rest just wants to open their mouth and hear themselves talk. The one or two people that truly think he's not tall enough should tell you the secret of how they think you can encourage him to get taller. I mean, you've certainly addressed it in your weekly family meeting, but the toddler just refuses to comply and grow taller. Your doctor says it's too early for a rack. Maybe Harry Potter has something? Time to read up on that a bit.
One of our neighbors has a kid that's a year younger and taller and heavier than my guy. Basically since they were 1 and 2. He's almost 4 now. It's hard to see. Friends commenting on it.
But you know what: since the beginning he's been on the 25th percentile for weight and 40th percentile for height, every time he has been measured. (And trust me, that first year, I weighed him a LOT!) That's just how he is. If he looks small to other people you have to learn to not let those comments bother you. It's a hard lesson, but take solace in knowing he's on his growth curve and that's good enough.
Some old grannies either have a distorted view of how a normal toddler should look. Let's be real, with half of the population obese in the US standards are skewed. And the rest just wants to open their mouth and hear themselves talk. The one or two people that truly think he's not tall enough should tell you the secret of how they think you can encourage him to get taller. I mean, you've certainly addressed it in your weekly family meeting, but the toddler just refuses to comply and grow taller. Your doctor says it's too early for a rack. Maybe Harry Potter has something? Time to read up on that a bit.
zrobinson126
New member
@pentie2003 My son was the heaviest birth weight of all the grandkids so far, but he is always compared...they all are. It's a freaking stupid competition. Don't even get me started on my mother's obsession with penis size in the four toddlers. It's absolutely ridiculous.
Your kid will be fine. He is the perfect size for him.
Your kid will be fine. He is the perfect size for him.
pentie2003
New member
@zrobinson126 Omg don’t you get me started on penises.
if I hear one more time that my boys will hate me because we didn’t circumcise them, I’m going to fucking scream. Why are you so obsessed with his penis and how it looks??????? And either what competition thing, it’s ridiculous. My in laws do it all the time with the boys. But I think what’s worse is that they never have anything good to say about his cousin who is ONLY 2. My BIL tries to force competition with these kids too. It’s ridiculous
if I hear one more time that my boys will hate me because we didn’t circumcise them, I’m going to fucking scream. Why are you so obsessed with his penis and how it looks??????? And either what competition thing, it’s ridiculous. My in laws do it all the time with the boys. But I think what’s worse is that they never have anything good to say about his cousin who is ONLY 2. My BIL tries to force competition with these kids too. It’s ridiculous