@fallingapart Ok so, I've seen so many comments about how siblings don't always get along or become close etc etc and this is totally true and but also there's so much opportunity for them to have great relationships too.
My mom and her 4 siblings don't speak to each other because of things that happened when my grandparents died. And while the fault is on her siblings for that situation, my mom is probably the most toxic one of them all. And while they can be pretty toxic too, I actually blame my grandmother who was an alcoholic for probably all of their lives, a pretty heinous woman, a shitty spouse and an emotionally abusive mother. So, great example of how badly things can turn out, but this could have been totally different had their mom been different, right?
With that said, I am the oldest of 4 kids, by 12 years. My mom had me a week after she turned 21, raised me by herself until she met my stepdad, they got married when I was ten and had my first sister when I was almost 13, second when I was 15 and my brother when I was 17. I always wanted siblings, I was always jealous of my friends who had siblings, but I wanted them when I was a child, not a teenager. I do not resent my mother for essentially creating another family, but I felt very disconnected for a long time because of the age difference and also, like I said before, my mom is a really toxic person. BUT, I never let that stop me from trying to have good relationships with my siblings. Now, of course, they have far different relationships with each other than with me because they actually grew up together and have many more shared experiences. But we all get along great and have actually bonded over our toxic mother and the situation we watched her go through with her siblings.
I had my first son when I was 22, I actually didn't want children and then I had him and I knew I wanted more. I wanted a family, I wanted him to have what my siblings got to have with each other. Unfortunately, his father and I divorced when he was 5 and I didn't get that opportunity to give him that family until.....last year LMAO. So, my oldest was 16 and I gave birth to his first brother. And they love each other SO much. The older one is now 17 and the baby is 10 months and we are a very close family. And because of his age being closer to my siblings, hes very close with my siblings as well, because he spent most of his childhood around them. And now we are going to try for another one because I don't feel like our family is quite complete. I could be wrong, it's in God's hands lol, but I want the baby to have someone to grow up with, like the oldest one should have had, but I want my oldest one to have the family he should have had all along.
My oldest would have been just fine without any siblings, in fact he didn't want any at all. But he is happy he has one now.
Lol don't know if that helps, but at the end of the day, anything can come of it. I'd be totally ok if we didn't have another one, but for us, it's worth trying for. Either way, both of my kids are loved and love each other. And that's all that matters to me.
that such a difficult situation. I’m going to consider this. I wish it wasn’t so hard for children on the spectrum and their siblings. Thanks so much for your advice 
I loved it and my daughter will be an only child as well. Happy to answer any specific questions you may have!
this helps tremendously thank you once again!