Needed to take a break from work, took a shot at it. 
1) Will my child forget me at daycare? – No, they won’t. They won’t form a stronger bond with a daycare worker than they have with you, their parent. Do I still get called by daycare worker names, teacher names, day camp counselor names? Yes, yes I do. But sometimes I call the kids by the cats’ names. We’re all human.
2) Is daycare bad for my child? Is daycare good for my child? – Some kids are homebodies and don’t want to leave. Some kids are social animals that can’t stand being cooped up in the house. In general, most kids want to interact with small people of their own age group, grow, learn, play. My kids didn’t love daycare every single day but we pulled them during COVID and the night before they went back, they woke up at 2 in the morning and got dressed because they were so excited.
3) Am I a bad mom because I have a job instead of being a SAHM? - No
4) But what about the people who tell me that I’m a bad mom?-- F those guys. Does anyone say this to dads? Does anyone tell them that they are missing their children being little? Does anyone stop a dad from travelling from work or being deployed because he is missing his children’s lives? Nope.
4a) Why do I feel so guilty about going back to work instead of being a SAHM? - Because we live in a stupid patriarchy. And also, we love our children and sometimes we just want to hang out with them.
5) Should I quit my job? Daycare is as much/almost as much/half of my take home pay. – For one thing, you contribute to household income and daycare is paid from household income. When you leave the work force, you create a gap in your resume. You lose out on valuable years of experience and potential for pay raises. You lose benefits and retirement contributions. And maybe, just maybe, you actually enjoy your career.
6) My kid gets sick ALL the time. Should I hire a nanny? – Sure, maybe. Kids get sick, especially that first year of daycare. Nannies get sick too. And nannies are household employees that get high hourly wages, overtime, sick leave, vacation. If you can afford it and you like the idea of having a nanny, go for it. Your kid will just get sick when they go to preschool or kindergarten.
7) Can I take care of my baby/infant/toddler while working from home? – No, those are two separate jobs that can’t be done well at the same time.
8) My kid finally made it to kindergarten, what do I do with them when school lets out at 1PM every day? What do you mean school is closed for a week in October and a week at Thanksgiving and two to three weeks at Christmas and a week at Easter and 10 weeks every summer? – Yeah, it sucks. Look into your local parks and rec or the Y or the JCC. You’ll probably need to use some PTO too when they get both Washington AND Lincoln’s birthdays off.
9) why won't my partner stay home on those days? Why don't they carry the mental load and the literal load? - Some partners do, some partners don't. Yeah, it sucks but we soldier on, right?
1) Will my child forget me at daycare? – No, they won’t. They won’t form a stronger bond with a daycare worker than they have with you, their parent. Do I still get called by daycare worker names, teacher names, day camp counselor names? Yes, yes I do. But sometimes I call the kids by the cats’ names. We’re all human.
2) Is daycare bad for my child? Is daycare good for my child? – Some kids are homebodies and don’t want to leave. Some kids are social animals that can’t stand being cooped up in the house. In general, most kids want to interact with small people of their own age group, grow, learn, play. My kids didn’t love daycare every single day but we pulled them during COVID and the night before they went back, they woke up at 2 in the morning and got dressed because they were so excited.
3) Am I a bad mom because I have a job instead of being a SAHM? - No
4) But what about the people who tell me that I’m a bad mom?-- F those guys. Does anyone say this to dads? Does anyone tell them that they are missing their children being little? Does anyone stop a dad from travelling from work or being deployed because he is missing his children’s lives? Nope.
4a) Why do I feel so guilty about going back to work instead of being a SAHM? - Because we live in a stupid patriarchy. And also, we love our children and sometimes we just want to hang out with them.
5) Should I quit my job? Daycare is as much/almost as much/half of my take home pay. – For one thing, you contribute to household income and daycare is paid from household income. When you leave the work force, you create a gap in your resume. You lose out on valuable years of experience and potential for pay raises. You lose benefits and retirement contributions. And maybe, just maybe, you actually enjoy your career.
6) My kid gets sick ALL the time. Should I hire a nanny? – Sure, maybe. Kids get sick, especially that first year of daycare. Nannies get sick too. And nannies are household employees that get high hourly wages, overtime, sick leave, vacation. If you can afford it and you like the idea of having a nanny, go for it. Your kid will just get sick when they go to preschool or kindergarten.
7) Can I take care of my baby/infant/toddler while working from home? – No, those are two separate jobs that can’t be done well at the same time.
8) My kid finally made it to kindergarten, what do I do with them when school lets out at 1PM every day? What do you mean school is closed for a week in October and a week at Thanksgiving and two to three weeks at Christmas and a week at Easter and 10 weeks every summer? – Yeah, it sucks. Look into your local parks and rec or the Y or the JCC. You’ll probably need to use some PTO too when they get both Washington AND Lincoln’s birthdays off.
9) why won't my partner stay home on those days? Why don't they carry the mental load and the literal load? - Some partners do, some partners don't. Yeah, it sucks but we soldier on, right?