Solo trip w/o wife @36wks: good or bad idea?

kurari

New member
Strictly hypothetically speaking, for a friend: your wife is preggo at 36 weeks. Doctor says don’t travel outside city. But your good friend has a wedding that weekend 5 hours away. Do you:

A. Leave wife behind to attend wedding alone,
B. Insist wife comes with because it’s a doable drive and can’t-miss-wedding, or
C. Respectfully decline the invitation and remain home with preggo wife that weekend?
 
@kurari Our first came a few days into the 36th week…. You probably wouldn’t miss the delivery, but being 5 hours away you would definitely miss driving her to the hospital and the labor.

Probability of birth that day is slim, but consequences are too high. Can’t miss wedding or can’t miss birth. Also if you partied, got covid and couldn’t go to the hospital; your wife would be pissed
 
@kurari Good Friend + wedding x drinks = guaranteed childbirth. Play it safe; else it'll be one costly Uber and you don't wanna show up to the hospital in a sweaty, hoppy wedding suit.
 
@kurari My baby arrived at 37 weeks… just remember traveling at 36 weeks even by car can increase risk of labor or complications. Altitude change, mobility and circulation changes, stress can all affect pregnancy in those final weeks. C would be the most appropriate option.
 
@nymichelle Seriously, this. My husband and I did a 2 hour drive at 33(ish) weeks and my legs were SO SWOLLEN. We stopped and I got out to walk a bit (and go to the bathroom AGAIN) to try to keep my circulation going every half hour but it wasn’t enough. I was miserable. I couldn’t have safely done a five hour drive at that point.
 
@temitayour I live in rural America and driving times can be lengthy. Do you think about 30 minutes is the maximum drive time in the end of the third trimester? We’ll be staying close to home but most things are about 30 minutes.

Obviously that’s a subjective question; just hoping to get a better sense for something I know nothing about!
 
@igbsx1 I live out in the country, too, and everything is a half hour from us. It was a 45 minute drive to the hospital on a good day. An hour was totally doable for me in a car with minimal discomfort and only a few instances of moaning and groaning (it’s a thing in late pregnancy). There will be swelling! Anything over that hour and it started to be really uncomfortable.
 
@kurari C is your best Avenue.

I would say A IS ONLY ACCEPTABLE ON ONE CONDITION: Are you the best man? If you are not the best man, stop. Go directly to C. If you are, you need to tell groom and then you need to attend the wedding and jet back home. You better get ready for 10 hours round trip.
 
@kurari What’s more can’t miss? The wedding or your wife’s water breaking?

My boy showed up at 33 +4. Any day could be the day at this point. Stay with your wife.
 
@kurari Depends on what your wife wants. I definitely wouldn't do B-- not sure how you can insist wife comes if she isn't comfortable with it AND her doctor advises against it, but I don't know your relationship. Honestly sounds like a dick move to "insist" she goes and runs the risk of going into labor/giving birth 5 hour from home. Go with A if your wife doesn't mind potentially giving birth without you.
 
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