Secret day off...Update!
- Thread starter maves
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- working moms
looktothefuture
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@maves Amazing, sounds like a really fulfilling day!! The last time I tried to have a day off to myself, I made the mistake of telling my husband. I woke up and he’d decided that he was working from home that day, and oh of course the builder was going to be there too. I went to work and cried on the way there. Next time it will be a secret!
@maves This is so awesome! I remembered the original post and it inspired me to do this soon and sadly it’s not a secret. I get extra day off for traveling for work. My husband was suppose to take the day off with me. I told him last night can you not take the day off. I am so excited I hope I get an exciting phone call or just catch up on sleep!
Maybe next time you could let your husband know at the end of the day and he can do kid pick up?
Maybe next time you could let your husband know at the end of the day and he can do kid pick up?
@maves I call that a “dick around day.” Sometimes you just need a day for yourself to turn the executive function part of your brain mostly off. Its a beautiful thing to have no responsibilities for the day, get a coffee and go dawdle around Target for a few hours and then maybe go get your nails done.
questioninghard
New member
@maves I love this! Great job, OP. I do this too, but I call it a wellness day and call in sick at work. And since I have school aged children, I also let them take a wellness day sometimes just to stay home and reset. It makes a huge difference. Oh, also my colleague and I used to schedule off every other Friday, switching Fridays, so we each got a Friday off every other week. We might start that back up again 
@maves Yes! My wife and I got into the habit of doing this as needed, and while we now tell each other when we're taking a day for just ourselves, it's still fun to have a "secret" itinerary. I'm the primary drop-off and pick-up parent so when I need a "mommy day," letting her know means we can adjust that bit to buy me some extra time. For my wife, I work from home so when I know she's taking a day, I close the office door so she has run of the house.
prayingkelly
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tiffanieus
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@inheretic Lololol this happens to me too. The appeal for me is silence in my own home. Last time, my husband ended up staying home sick from work that day. Having a spouse with a man cold playing call of duty all day was definitely not what I was hoping for. 
@maves My husband and I both agree that we deserve a day off where toddler goes to daycare and we do whatever we want. My first time alone in my own home was babies first birthday, work gave me the day off, and I took him to daycare for a half day. Those 4 hours were glorious! I’m hoping I can scrape enough pto together to take another day off this summer. It’s hard because all my PTO goes to sick days from aforementioned daycare…
@maves I love this! I especially love how it all came together so perfectly for you! I usually schedule a day off, pack it with things like the salon and spa and then regret that I didn’t just do nothing or let the day take me where it’s going to take me! You’ve inspired me to take another day for myself!
tiffanieus
New member
@chasmate Same same. Although I don’t usually go to the salon, I just spend the day doing the same chores I do every other day lol (uninterrupted! But still). I have a hard time relaxing when the house isn’t clean so I’m going to plan a weekend to get everything caught up and then take Monday off so everything is clean and I can actually just relax in the silence!! Lol. The ironic thing is my family or spouse would take the kids any day for me to go to the salon, but it’s a lot harder to get silent alone time in my own house. So that’s why I try to use my secret days off for
@tiffanieus I also have a hard time relaxing when the house is a mess! I try to clean on Fridays (in between work/meetings) so that I can just relax on the weekends but it’s never enough. So I take full days off to just clean. Which sounds so boring But sometimes it just has to get done!
But sometimes it just has to get done!tiffanieus
New member
@chasmate Omg me too, I WFH on Fridays so I do laundry and get caught up on anything we put off throughout the week. It has definitely helped my weekends to not feel like a cleaning spree! I think I just need to set expectations for the days I take off, cleaning day vs mental health day. Cause right now they allllll turn into cleaning days. Which like you said, is necessary! But I need to give myself permission to not be productive every single time lol