Pregnant again 5 months postpartum

@rubbersoul At 3.5 months postpartum I discovered I was pregnant again. I lost my mind and had a complete mental breakdown thinking this was horrible. My husband was shockingly on board with it. After a few months I started warming up to the idea. Now I’m 29 weeks with my second girl, and have my perfect little 10 month old girl and they’ll be the best of friends 💕 hopefully anyways lol we were using condoms so it was a complete shock.

Although we do have IUGR that my OB suspects is related to the back to back pregnancy. Hopefully things are going to be okay for my girl.
 
@rubbersoul My kids have a 14 month age gap. My first is 17 months and my second is 3 months. So we are in the thick of it. It’s exhausting and extremely hard sometimes, but my toddler just made the baby laugh the other day and I started to get a glimmer of hope. My biggest advice is remember you and your husband are a team. 2 under 2 is VERY stressful, especially in the early days, but with good communication on what you both need and a united front, you guys will be fine. Congrats!
 
@rubbersoul I was 4 months postpartum when I found out I was pregnant again with my current pregnancy. Both of my other children were planned but happened faster than we had expected so they were still shocking.

I’m due in March so we’ll see how it turns out! I started out this pregnancy heavier than I would have liked to, but my doctors have not been concerned about it nor the short spacing between my pregnancies. Yes it would have been better to have more recovery time and the risk of preterm labor is increased by the short interval but if your last pregnancy was uncomplicated and you carried to full-term then the odds are in your favor.

I’d advise to hold onto all your newborn stuff and get ready for round 2! I don’t know what to expect as far as having 2 young ones since mine hasn’t arrived yet, but I can say that my other 2 kids were very different experiences as far as babies go. I thought I knew what to expect since I’d had one baby- but the second one had different preferences and quirks so it was almost like going in all over again as a new parent. Basically, don’t get too confident with what you think will work and be flexible haha
 
@rubbersoul I am currently 11 weeks pregnant with a 7 month old. So I don’t have any advice but I am commenting in solidarity lol so I was probably about 4.5 months pp when I became pregnant and I was definitely concerned about how close together it was and my obgyn wasn’t too concerned and just is having me take a calcium supplements and vitamin D on top of like prenatals and stuff. Plenty of woman have gone thru this and have had healthy babies so I just try to remember that. It’s been hard being pregnant with a baby tho I’ll say that. Thankfully he’s cool about me putting him down and running to go puke in the bathroom. I got lucky there
 
@rubbersoul I have Irish twins, both born in 2023, with my first just celebrating their birthday today, and my second a week and a few days old. My baby is in the NICU for being born early, so I’ll mainly focus on how my body took to two back to back pregnancies:

It was mostly okay in the first and second trimester. I did suffer from nausea and vomiting the first pregnancy and I think my body was used to that phase of pregnancy this time so I only vomited once a day at most. Second trimester was a breeze.

Third trimester is where I really felt it. It was harder to hold my baby, put him down in his crib, and I was just overall exhausted. I had C- Sections both times and I’m definitely healing slower than the first time- not just because of two in the same year but I can’t not hold my oldest when he needs me. I have my first post partum appointment on Friday so I’m going to see what my doctor says about my recovery but I feel pretty positive about it. I do also have plenty of help so even though I do pick up my oldest, my husband and my parents are picking up the bulk of the baby care especially while I pump, feed myself, and go visit the NICU. It’s definitely been tough but I know it’s going to be so wonderful to see them grow up together!

Good luck! And think about joining r/2under2 as well! Lots of good advice over there!
 
@rubbersoul My oldest boys are 14 months apart. I was in denial that I was pregnant again. My partner knew it before I tested. I had anxiety worried about how could I love them both and show my first the attention he needs while caring for a newborn. I lucked out and they were easy together. Caring for 2 under 2 was a breeze compared to my now 9 month old.
 
@rubbersoul I was 8 months postpartum when I got pregnant again. Two under two was hard, but when my youngest was around 3, she and her brother's relationship blossomed. Now (youngest is 3 years and 7 months, oldest just turned 5) I can lay around in bed weekend mornings while the kids play, making up adorable pretend-play stories together, wrestling, playing hide and seek, etc. It is so wonderful watching their relationship grow, and it was so worth the tough years to now have built-in playdates all the time. I respect my friends' decisions to have bigger gaps, but I feel a little sorry for them missing out on what my kids have.
 
@rubbersoul I’m in the same position! My son is 4 1/2 months and I’m 8 weeks pregnant. It is kinda scary but I like the idea of having 2 babies close together because they’ll likely be best friends. It’ll be okay! You got this 🙂
 
@rubbersoul I don’t have any advice but wanted to tell you my sister and I are 11 months apart and we are now 33 and 34 and have always been best buddies :) your kids will be lucky to have each other!
 
@rubbersoul I currently have a 8 month old and a 2 year old. The newborn phase was pure hell for me. My 8 month old had colic and reflux so he screamed for 12 weeks and would only sleep in the car or when held. I tried to breastfeed him but it just was too much for me to handle so I went to formula and that helped a ton. I do miss being able to give either of them my full attention. Some days are pure survival but I would say we are now having more good days than bad ones. I found an in home daycare my daughter can go to a few days a week so I can spend time with just him and she can be social. They are starting to interact together more now and I love seeing that. We are done having kids now and when my daughter moves out of a phase my son moves into it so I don’t have stuff sitting around awhile. We are by and large done with sleepless nights now. We do more tv time than I ever really wanted but during those first few months it was essential for us. We don’t have any consistent help so Ms Rachel and Sesame Street were it. It’s important to remember to be gracious with yourself and keep in mind that difficult phases will pass and you just have to make it one day to the next.
 
@rubbersoul My sister is 14 months older than me. And we have a brother who is 3 years older than my sister. So my Mum had a toddler and two under two. I'm sure it was hard but it's so nice habing a sister close in age.
 
@rubbersoul Start thinking about hospital plans and where your older kid is going to stay when you’re in labor/in recovery.

I didn’t think about this until the very end, and it hit me like a ton of bricks that my sweet baby(2yo) who had never spent a night away from me, would suddenly have to spend several days and nights at someone else’s house.

Also, something that isn’t talked about because it’s considered some kind of taboo subject: after you have baby, your hormones can alter the way you feel about your older child. It doesn’t always happen but if it does, just know that your love for your older child will come back. It’s just hormones scrabbling your brain.
 
@rubbersoul I have never been through this, but I have a coworker that got pregnant again 5 or 6 months postpartum. She cut her workload down to part-time with us. She announced her 2nd pregnancy at the height of the baby formula shortage in 2022. Luckily, that cleared up before she gave birth the 2nd time. I don't remember exactly what the issue was, but she was told by her doctors that breastfeeding wasn't a possibility for her.

From what she has shared with me, the beginning was rough, but now her boys (32 months and 16 months) are the best of friends and are on the same schedules. She still has them in daycares and occasionally has her in-laws help when they are visiting.

I guess my advice as an observer to seeing this unfold with her would be to check in with your obgyn about getting your body in the best shape you can for this 2nd baby and mapping out a plan for what you will do about recovery, work, childcare, etc once this baby arrives.

As others have suggested, checking out r/2under2 would probably be helpful.

Wishing you all the best! ❤️
 
@rubbersoul I just came here to say, lucky you.

I'm 6 months pp and trying for another, just got my period back.

My period was late and I thought it worked but no.
 
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