@allenard77 2 week old dad here…and so far it has gone away in my wife’s case. But! Once baby arrives you can physically check them and get much stronger reassurance.
@allenard77 Wow this is fairly similar to our situation, though we are perhaps 8 weeks ahead of you right now! In our case we had a miscarriage first before my wife’s current pregnancy, so I really relate to that feeling of guarding your heart after you do a transfer and play that waiting game. I am sure you all are looking at the Miscarriage Odds Reassurer and crunching all the numbers given your specific situations. But from a human standpoint it isn’t really about that, it’s about when you feel like you can ALLOW yourself to feel certain things. For us, that feeling of “letting the possibility in” (in a sense) slowly began dawning at around 8 weeks. And it really picked up by around 10. By 12 we were suddenly realizing we had a LOT of things to do and prepare for, and that feeling of stress was SO wonderful to experience, I was just so deeply grateful to finally have all this shit to worry about. At around that point, the anxieties became probably not that different from what most expecting couples feel.
@allenard77 As someone who has pretty bad anxiety, went through a miscarriage with my wife, and just had a baby about a week ago, I can tell you it pretty much never goes away not until I heard that first noise come out of his mouth. It definitely helps once she can start to feel movements so you know they are in there moving around but it doesn’t go away. It was almost unbearable at a certain point.
That said, so many people told me that the anxiety gets worse after they’re born and I’ll say it’s actually gotten a lot better. Yes, SIDS is a concern but our doctor has made feel good about it and as long as you follow all of the right things it minimizes it as much as possible.
Hate to tell you that it doesn’t get better but it just doesn’t.
