journierman
New member
The background of it: My mom and her sisters own/owned a corporation. An inheritance from their father. My mom was the CEO and was the only owner actually working there. By way of the most tragic car accident last month, I now own my mother’s 1/3 of company and I control legally in perpetuity my eldest aunt’s shares as she has advanced dementia.
I’ve worked for the family corporation for over 13 years and have been actively training to take over for my mom when she retired. I’m 40, my mom was 65.
My uncle who is married to my mom’s middle sister has worked there since 1978 (with a 5 year-ish hiatus when he worked for a competitor as he was fired by my grandfather for taking suspected kickbacks). Upon his return, my grandfather (his father-in-law) began his fight with dementia and my uncle began to run the company (albeit poorly). The things he still doesn’t understand about our product is mind boggling.
On the brink of bankruptcy, my mom came in and took the company over with the backing of her eldest sister. She knew nothing of the company and learned as quick as possible. She fought hard for the respect of the employees which are 90% men. My mom was 42 at the time with 0 business experience. She saved the company and led it to its best years ever.
Fast forward 10 years, I go to work for the family company, go get my MBA per my mom’s prompting while working full time, and learn as much as I can as I was her retirement/succession plan. Unfortunately my mom never got her retirement and died tragically in a car accident. My dad survived the accident thankfully but is still healing.
So I control 2/3 of the company shares, while owning a 1/3. The writing is on the wall that I would move into her position. Additionally, the employees are telling me they hope I take over for my mom. It’s not been a secret that I was the one in line. Absolutely, never a secret.
So I return to work. I bring up we need to announce and finalize my move into CEO soon. My uncle acts confused and then tells me that I’m not ready. He was 43 when he stepped into lead with 16 years of “experience” if we ignore the years he was gone. 11/12 years if we don’t ignore them. He also has gotten us sued and laughs about how he doesn’t read legal documents. People openly consider him incompetent. I wish I was lying, but we have customers who ask for him to leave meetings because he sleeps. He’s also 72.
I guess he thought he would get to lead again. I’m just shocked. I’m not 100% surprised as death brings out the worst in some. But here I am, holding 2/3 shares and I’m questioning myself. Over 13 years of hard work, all this heartbreaking loss of losing my mom whom I loved dearly and he’s making it like I have bad timing and am choosing this.
I keep thinking — what if I told him he wasn’t ready? He would be offended. But he didn’t care about saying that to me.
He also made it like he had to step up because of the condition of my grandfather but doesn’t see my situation as similar, when my mom is literally gone.
The only silver lining is my coworker’s kind support, the years of people telling my mom to retire, that DearMarionberry can handle it. Ugh, but the doubt is really throwing me for a loop.
He also cleaned out my mom’s office without asking. Coworkers called me crying about them taking down her personal family photos while I was working on funeral arrangements. He also moved his chair to her position at the board room table. They sat at each heads/ends of the table. I’m not sure why his end wasn’t good enough. It feels yucky.
I really hate this.
I’ve worked for the family corporation for over 13 years and have been actively training to take over for my mom when she retired. I’m 40, my mom was 65.
My uncle who is married to my mom’s middle sister has worked there since 1978 (with a 5 year-ish hiatus when he worked for a competitor as he was fired by my grandfather for taking suspected kickbacks). Upon his return, my grandfather (his father-in-law) began his fight with dementia and my uncle began to run the company (albeit poorly). The things he still doesn’t understand about our product is mind boggling.
On the brink of bankruptcy, my mom came in and took the company over with the backing of her eldest sister. She knew nothing of the company and learned as quick as possible. She fought hard for the respect of the employees which are 90% men. My mom was 42 at the time with 0 business experience. She saved the company and led it to its best years ever.
Fast forward 10 years, I go to work for the family company, go get my MBA per my mom’s prompting while working full time, and learn as much as I can as I was her retirement/succession plan. Unfortunately my mom never got her retirement and died tragically in a car accident. My dad survived the accident thankfully but is still healing.
So I control 2/3 of the company shares, while owning a 1/3. The writing is on the wall that I would move into her position. Additionally, the employees are telling me they hope I take over for my mom. It’s not been a secret that I was the one in line. Absolutely, never a secret.
So I return to work. I bring up we need to announce and finalize my move into CEO soon. My uncle acts confused and then tells me that I’m not ready. He was 43 when he stepped into lead with 16 years of “experience” if we ignore the years he was gone. 11/12 years if we don’t ignore them. He also has gotten us sued and laughs about how he doesn’t read legal documents. People openly consider him incompetent. I wish I was lying, but we have customers who ask for him to leave meetings because he sleeps. He’s also 72.
I guess he thought he would get to lead again. I’m just shocked. I’m not 100% surprised as death brings out the worst in some. But here I am, holding 2/3 shares and I’m questioning myself. Over 13 years of hard work, all this heartbreaking loss of losing my mom whom I loved dearly and he’s making it like I have bad timing and am choosing this.
I keep thinking — what if I told him he wasn’t ready? He would be offended. But he didn’t care about saying that to me.
He also made it like he had to step up because of the condition of my grandfather but doesn’t see my situation as similar, when my mom is literally gone.
The only silver lining is my coworker’s kind support, the years of people telling my mom to retire, that DearMarionberry can handle it. Ugh, but the doubt is really throwing me for a loop.
He also cleaned out my mom’s office without asking. Coworkers called me crying about them taking down her personal family photos while I was working on funeral arrangements. He also moved his chair to her position at the board room table. They sat at each heads/ends of the table. I’m not sure why his end wasn’t good enough. It feels yucky.
I really hate this.
