Made a PB&J, cut it into quarters, then realized…

[neodakine]

@givemeareason You can pick out the parents, they are the ones who gently sway for no reason.

 

[ymlgarcia]

@givemeareason I tend to do the stroller rocking thing with grocery carts...

 

[hawk7071]

@ymlgarcia Yup, me too. It was my first thought when I read the prompt.

 

[thievingmagpie]

@confusedfl22 Went to the vet today. I told my dog to wave bye-bye to the receptionist as we were leaving.

 

[eataylor]

@thievingmagpie Oh that is finny! Did you lean into and make the dog’s paw or tail wave? I did that at the vet too and just grabbed my dogs tail and wagged it for her. The receptionist chuckled i felt better.

 

[janggeungulk]

@confusedfl22 I had to reset someone's password over the phone and spelled out using letter sounds (phonics).

 

[christianabdl]

@confusedfl22 You know the toddler is going to want some. But if the sandwich was actually for them they won’t even look at it.

 

[confusedfl22]

@christianabdl She didn‘t see me make it, and she goes to a daycare where they prepare meals for the kids. But she LOVES sandwiches.

 

[bevinluvwithjesus]

@confusedfl22 I point out planes flying past, even if I’m on my own. Even if I’m with other adults. ‘Look, a plane!’

 

[zac2]

@bevinluvwithjesus My (now) 6 year old used to LOVE garbage trucks. Even now, when I see one, my brain goes "Hey! A garbage truck!"

 

[katrina2017]

@confusedfl22 my wife asked me to pour her a glass of wine and make baby a bottle. in a trance i made two bottles and handed one to each of them. wife was understandably confused.

 

[confusedfl22]

@katrina2017 Sleep deprivation is a helluva drug

 

[julissa]

@confusedfl22 On autopilot nearly lifted my wife into child's car seat on a rare trip out that didn't include said kiddo.

 

[confusedfl22]

@julissa Did she resist or just let it happen?

 

[julissa]

@confusedfl22 She questioned what I was doing after I'd opened the car door and navigated her to it. I'd like to think I would have aborted by myself even without that prompt!

 

[theatheist1]

@confusedfl22 I was helping person A at work, when we had to bring in person B to get the job done. When it was finished, and person B was leaving, I told person A “make sure you say Thank you.”

Thankfully, person A is a mom of young kids and she laughed about it.

 

[121zla]

@confusedfl22 Butter and parm pasta. It is a sub one-minute banger of a snack (assuming left over noodles and a microwave) and by golly it's top 3 dishes for effort to reward ratio.

Recipie:

Pasta of the shape required by your child with a little water in a bowl and a wet paper towel over it, microwave 22 seconds.

You have 22 seconds to get a pat of butter and parm out.

Dump any extra water out.

Put the butter on the noodles and zap for 11 seconds

Clean up kitchen for 11 seconds

Stir with fork

Add 1/2 o the parm

Stir again

Plate into two plastic bowls and a daddy bowl

Top with rest of parm

Serve

59 seconds. *Fist Pump*

Sit down to your own bowl of butter parm noodles

 

[confusedfl22]

@121zla Down to a science. Love it.

 

[roundsquare314159]

@confusedfl22 we were having a dinner party (no kids!) and my husband was putting together a charcuterie board. He started cutting all the grapes in half and when I asked him what he was doing, he just paused for a long moment and then got this look of realization on his face. Like - oh yeah, adults don't need grapes cut in half, do they?

 

[olivialora]

@confusedfl22 Wipe my butt. I make every inch of that paper useful I paid good money for it, i'm going to get it's worth.