I prayed for 2 years to become pregnant & now that I am, I’m depressed 😭

[turboizak]

I just need somewhere to vent so if you don’t want to read all of this I understand but this will make me feel better writing it all out. I’ve always dreamed of the day I’d get pregnant with my husband, have this “beautiful life together” and it was such a struggle to get pregnant. I thought something was wrong with me and I saw doctor after doctor for them to all say, “you’re fine, idk why y’all can’t get pregnant” fast forward 2 years later and here I am 27 weeks pregnant with our first. I wanted this so much & I had prepared myself mentally(or thought I prepared myself) for all the sacrifices I would have to make and all the hardship I would have to endure while pregnant. Turns out this is extremely exhausting mentally and physically and I’m a depressive mess. I feel trapped, like I’m forced to follow rules & I can’t do anything I want to do because of another human. I hate that mindset but I’m so angry right now. I just want MY body back None of my friends invite me anywhere & I feel so alone. No one calls me to check up on me and I’ve reached out many times to receive the “I’m busy text”. I hate that I can’t have alcohol. I wasn’t an alcoholic before, I would drink socially on the weekends but bc I’m told I “can’t” the urge to want to do it is SO strong! I can’t workout, which I did religiously before pregnancy bc I have a small hemorrhage. I can’t eat raw sushi. I can’t do anything and I’m literally stuck inside distracting myself for 27 weeks and the next 13 weeks sleeping and playing video games bc I just want it to be over. I feel so alone. I’m sure it’ll be worse after the baby so I really shouldn’t cry right now. But this is hard. I feel for every pregnant mama.

 

[garryowen]

@turboizak I didn't like being pregnant, other than knowing it would end in my baby. I know for some women it's magical but I can't see it.

The relief when they yanked the 10lb baby off my lungs was immense

It's not worse after. Yes you're a tired zombie for a while but you can go eat sushi and bend over to put your own damn shoes on, and sleep in any position you want. And the other person who made the baby can actually help. Then they start sleeping more and you feel like a new woman.

 

[jacpal]

@turboizak I think so many people don’t understand how hard and isolating pregnancy can be. I had some really solid friends who were so supportive before I was pregnant. As soon as I became pregnant they became distant, didn’t want to hang out and then they did some really messed up stuff. Being pregnant feels very vulnerable and I feel people can take advantage of that.

The friends who you are now distant with weren’t decent friends. It is isolating but what I’ve found helpful is trying to focus on educating myself and surrounding myself with positive people. Focus on the friends who are supportive and also try and make some new mommy friends. It’s important to have support from people who understand what you’re going through.

Read some good books and listen to positive podcasts. Cut out things that are negative because it won’t help you. If you fill your mind with negativity, you’re not going to feel great.

Be kind to yourself. You are literally creating a human. Your body is going through so much. So if all you do in a day is rest, eat and play games that is fine because that is what you needed to do that day. But do try and accomplish little things too. Like reading something educational or doing some gentle yoga.

It’s hard being pregnant and I’ve gained profound respect for every other lady who has gone through this. You will get through this. And it will be so worthwhile when you finally meet the tiny human you created.

You are doing amazing. Be proud of what you have created.

 

[fomor]

@turboizak Your definitely not alone! I to am going through the same thing! I am currently pregnant with our 3rd and final baby. I literally feel as if I don’t belong to myself and like I can’t do ANYTHING. This was a planned pregnancy, but yet I still feel like this. With my second baby I went through the same problem but it disappeared around the second trimester. I truly believe hormones have a big part in it. Just know your not alone. I’ve looked this up before and plenty of other women deal with the same thing.