I knew the baby shower would be bad, but I never could have anticipated this ..

[clueless5]

@raving4him How did you keep it together? It sounds like a nightmare!

I would have just stood up and left immediantely. No words, just stormed out. Because I wouldn't have been able to stay composed. I would've screamed and cried right in front of them, which I think would be worse... I feel horrible...

 

[raving4him]

@clueless5 Honestly I have no idea. When everyone was crowding around her to hug her and congratulate her I just hung back by the food table and tried to compose myself before anyone noticed anything, I think I went into shock / was numb. I am a huge crier (cry when I’m mad/sad/happy , etc) and I don’t know how I didn’t just burst into tears. I choked them back and I remember thinking “don’t ruin this moment for her” and taking a lot of deep breaths. I still can’t really believe it.

 

[abzu]

@raving4him You are such a lovely friend and I'm sure your friends would like the chance to be there for you, the way you are for all of them. Hope you manage to talk to your husband about this. We all cope in different ways and for some of us, keeping things to ourselves is not the best method.
Sending so much love x

 

[martinly]

@clueless5 I would have had to leave as well. I want to scream just thinking about it.

 

[clueless5]

@martinly Glad I'm not alone.

 

[jeremychristian]

@raving4him Oh this makes me want to cry for you. I’m so sorry. Baby showers are already rough enough without adding that on top. Sending hugs.

 

[zaravasileva]

@raving4him Ugh I’m so sorry! Nice for your friend but torturous for you. I definitely think being honest w your friends and also seeing a counselor might be helpful.

But this is what I came here to say: it’s also ok NOT to attend a baby shower, especially for a 4th child. But even if it’s for a first child. Don’t torture yourself if you’re not feeling it. Make your apologies and don’t go. Enlist your husband to make an excuse. Whatever you need to do. Because at some point, you need to take care of you. And if that means don’t go to all these baby showers, that’s what it means.

 

[purestofpure]

@raving4him What the heck. Wow. Hugs.