UPDATE: I (24) recently found out I have a 5yo son I never knew about and now he lives with me

[vathir]

@mercantilewriter Absolutely beautiful update! Thank you for sharing your journey with us! I pray for the best for you both!!!

 

[renudiz]

@mercantilewriter I feel like crying this is so awesome and wholesome. This made me smile so hard! You’re doing amazing, and I’m sure your mother will be able to help you with anything you don’t fully understand yet. Your parenting instincts are spot on so far. You seem to have a good support system and that’s great. Keep it up and you’ll do amazing!

 

[chaosgeeks]

@mercantilewriter I have been looking for this resource for days and finally found it! Look up foster.parenting on Instagram or fosterparentpartner.com, while I know you aren't a foster I think you could get a lot of tips for navigating your new life with your boy. Good luck!

 

[carheyiu]

@mercantilewriter You are a wonderful caring dad. You sound like you're doing everything correctly. You sound like you are both thinking things through carefully yet also acting compassionately on instinct. This kid is lucky to have you.

I have a 6 year old and his dad died (my ex husband) and its been tough talking to him about it and getting it right from a parenting perspective. Getting the child into counselling or therapy is a good idea at this stage they use play to talk it through to the child. Also i give him lots of hugs. You may find your son gets separation anxiety so consistency in being there is how you overcome that (though it sounds like you are probably aware of all of this)

Anyway. I would really like to hear more updates. A big well done you wonderful person.

 

[rnvor]

@mercantilewriter He is so lucky to have you! None of us know what we are doing when we first have a child but just know that your love and attention is what they want and need most!

 

[erbard1]

@mercantilewriter Wow! You are an amazing person!!! Keep us updated! Hope things work out for both of you!!

 

[katrina2017]

@mercantilewriter This actually made me tear up. You are a good man.

 

[hspainting]

@mercantilewriter Might be a good idea to record some videos on your phone carrying these moments — especially when he willingly talks about his mom. He’d have her memory of her at age 5 captured in little moments to refer back to as he grows up. Note: ask a therapist about this.

 

[katrina2017]

@mercantilewriter You are a good man!

 

[rogervw]

@mercantilewriter This makes me so happy! Thank you for the update.

 

[sally1b2b]

@mercantilewriter This didn’t come across on my main page, so I didn’t see this update until now. I am so glad things are going well! One thing I will throw out there to help with teeth brushing… There’s an app called Pokémon Smile. If you brush your teeth well, you catch Pokémon! My boys love it. Also, check out the Dragon books. They cover a wide variety of topics, can be bought through the website or Amazon, and are really fun for kids. I discovered them by happenstance, and my boys love them. I just recently bought A Dragon With ADHD because my middle guy just got his diagnosis!

Again, feel free to reach out for anything! I am the book and board game obsessed mom, so I have a ton of recommendations!

 

[thelukewormchrist]

@mercantilewriter Buy your son a switch!

 

[trsdembe]

@mercantilewriter While reading your posts i felt so happy for you, i feel like you totally got this and i think youre gonna be a great dad, advice i can give you is be patient and dont worry if you make mistakes we all do, after some time you will get to know him and it will become easier, i became a parent when i was 20 and i admit i was shit for the first 2 years but now i got the hang of it and im 100% sure you will too. He will call you dad one day i can feel it and from then on you will know what you need to do and you will be sure of yourself. Good luck

 

[jackmt]

@mercantilewriter I would add reading to the bedtime routine. Read him a couple of books a night. Take him to the bookstore and let him pick out some books. You could make going to the library part of your new routine.

 

[fairytales]

@mercantilewriter I wish you both the best. This really touched me. My son is 5 as well. Best of luck!

 

[speakingintongues]

@mercantilewriter UPDATEME

 

[speakingintongues]

@mercantilewriter UPDATEME

 

[danrisk]

@mercantilewriter It truly sounds like "Jack" hit the jackpot. After the tragic circumstances you'd wish on no one, it sounds like his luck turned totally around. Stay as awesome as you are, dad!

 

[bluemax]

@mercantilewriter Update again!

 

[katrina2017]

@mercantilewriter Sounds like you know exactly how to be a dad. You’re doing great. Get him involved in reading books. If he’s shy, this will open up a whole new world for him. You can even read him a story at bedtime. Show him how to do simple chores around the house. This will help him feel like it’s his house too. Cook eggs in the kitchen and have him watch how you do it. Kids find this type of stuff fascinating. He’s probably had very few home-cooked meals. Find out if he has any hobbies or interests. Who are his favorite fictional characters in movies? Rent, stream or buy a movie to watch together. If you’re religious, introduce him to your particular brand. Take him to Sunday school where he can meet local kids his age. Start a craft project with him. Take pictures because these will become priceless memories. I’m so glad to hear things are moving forward. Good luck and he’s lucky to have you.