@savemonopolylatw2votv Teach him how to do the thing. It's stupid that we have to, but that's the way to break away from being the Ruler. Make the planning a meeting that you're both involved in. A weekly meeting is a great way to do this. Sit down and look at your calendars for the next week. Do your meal plan. Figure out what tasks need to be done and divide them up. Don't just invisibly do this and hand him a list. He helps make the list. He learns how this thinking is done and you both contribute. Then he's involved in choosing his responsibilities, too.
If there's anything he gets that he doesn't know how to do, show him once or twice. Then it's up to him. Show him what all needs done to clean the bathroom. If he is planning your kid's birthday party, help him make the list. You say okay, so it's a kid's birthday party. What all do we need? Food. Yep. We'll need a cake, finger foods, and a meal that's easy to serve to a crowd. All kid-friendly. What else? Decorations. Blah, blah.
Or just tell him to Google it . But if you want it done a certain way, set up a standard and help him figure it out once. If he's claiming he can't do it after that, it's weaponized incompetence and it's time for therapy or divorce.
If there's anything he gets that he doesn't know how to do, show him once or twice. Then it's up to him. Show him what all needs done to clean the bathroom. If he is planning your kid's birthday party, help him make the list. You say okay, so it's a kid's birthday party. What all do we need? Food. Yep. We'll need a cake, finger foods, and a meal that's easy to serve to a crowd. All kid-friendly. What else? Decorations. Blah, blah.
Or just tell him to Google it . But if you want it done a certain way, set up a standard and help him figure it out once. If he's claiming he can't do it after that, it's weaponized incompetence and it's time for therapy or divorce.