@almunday I can totally empathize with this and understand how you feel completely. Seems like ever since we started TTC everyone (including my best friend) got pregnant, and almost all were by accident. Must be nice to have it so easy! I can resonate with the feelings of sadness, guilt and annoyance. Don’t beat yourself up about it!
I don’t know if I can handle another close friend getting pregnant
- Thread starter almunday
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@almunday I feel you. All my friends already have babies, one of them is waiting for her 2nd, and my best friend told me 5 days ago that she got pregnant by accident with the guy she knows for a few months. That was the day my 14th cycle started, no positive tests so far. So I really know how you feel, the jealousy, resentment, hopelessness. And above all - loneliness. This journey is the lonliest one I have ever had to take.
@almunday I agree. My husband is a wonderful person, he is so patient, he listens to me for hours, he holds me while I cry every time I get my period... But I see that he doesn't understand how difficult this is for a woman. He is always like "we will get there, don't worry, try to relax, we will have babies...". He is in this with me indeed, but he actually isn't really IN THIS. If you understand what I want to say...
@almunday I'm so so sorry..
I wish I didn't know the feeling.
I've been trying for 2 years now, and recently I found out I have a micropolycystic ovary and was told it's the reason I haven't been able to get pregnant.
Lately I have been hearing the sentence "heyy guess who's pregnant?" a little too much for my liking.
To make things worse, I don't think my husband wants a baby that much anymore (we both work very long hours and have weird schedules), so...yeah. I'm just gonna sit here and see my not-so-fertile years go by.
Sending all my love to you. You're gonna make it!
I wish I didn't know the feeling.
I've been trying for 2 years now, and recently I found out I have a micropolycystic ovary and was told it's the reason I haven't been able to get pregnant.
Lately I have been hearing the sentence "heyy guess who's pregnant?" a little too much for my liking.
To make things worse, I don't think my husband wants a baby that much anymore (we both work very long hours and have weird schedules), so...yeah. I'm just gonna sit here and see my not-so-fertile years go by.
Sending all my love to you. You're gonna make it!
kylespringer
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@almunday I’ve thought a lot about this in myself too, because for so many other milestones I didn’t feel the same sort of way (engagements, marriage, buying homes, etc). Maybe a little, but not the same sadness as failing to conceive. I think it’s the unknown and the inability to say like “oh it will happen for me someday” . I knew eventually the other things would/did happen , but this is different. So little control and absolutely no guarantee. It sucks.
hyperionlight
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@almunday I feel you. My husband didn’t tell me his sister was pregnant until she came to visit for Easter because he wanted to spare me the heartache. And recently his best friends wife got pregnant with her 4th child and he didn’t tell me because he wanted to spare me again. I only found out because I was on his iPad when the notification came in late. I’m so sorry you’re going through this
keithjamess
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nightfall09
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mattwilliams
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goldensilver
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don't feel guilty for feeling how you feel. Don't feel bad for being mad, sad, jealous, tired, devastated, melancholy, happy, envious, excited, all the emotions. It's not fair in the slightest. Feel your feelings and take care of you. Sending internet hugs @almunday My fourth egg retrieval is tomorrow. I discovered shortly after getting engaged that I have a very low AMH and a premutation for fragile X that means we will never be able to try to get pregnant naturally, even if my low AMH wasn’t an issue. I’ve grieved the loss of so many things, getting pregnant the fun way being a big one.
My husband and I got married this Spring in the midst of all things fertility. To be honest, it ruined what should have been a happy time but low AMH means egg retrievals take priority.
His close friend and wife didn’t make it to the wedding but sent a video speech to play. Initially I thought, “how thoughtful!”. I already knew they were pregnant (weren’t sure they wanted kids, tried once and it worked). They also knew of the many struggles we had already had and that having a family would be an uphill battle for us.
Anyways, in the video speech, at our rehearsal dinner, they said in the video “wish we could be there but we can’t.. we are going to the obgyn tomorrow!”… announcing their pregnancy to the group at large.
I was fuming. To announce your own milestone at someone else’s wedding is already bad. But to announce your pregnancy at a couples wedding who knows kids are not a guarantee?!
Of course, I couldn’t react how it wanted to because every other person in that room got babies when they wanted babies. No one got it. I walked away and totally ignored the group as they FaceTimed the couple to say congrats. And of course, we are happy for them, but to put salt in an open wound during a special moment is almost unforgivable.
We saw that couple this past weekend, now a few more months pregnant. Plenty of insensitive things. One of which referring to how expensive it is to purchase things for said baby. I’m pretty sure I made a comment at that - we’ve already got you beat. Aka - Please be thankful for what you have!
A friend of mine (also struggling with infertility) and I now jokingly call those babies “Free Babies”. It makes me laugh because what else is there?
My husband and I got married this Spring in the midst of all things fertility. To be honest, it ruined what should have been a happy time but low AMH means egg retrievals take priority.
His close friend and wife didn’t make it to the wedding but sent a video speech to play. Initially I thought, “how thoughtful!”. I already knew they were pregnant (weren’t sure they wanted kids, tried once and it worked). They also knew of the many struggles we had already had and that having a family would be an uphill battle for us.
Anyways, in the video speech, at our rehearsal dinner, they said in the video “wish we could be there but we can’t.. we are going to the obgyn tomorrow!”… announcing their pregnancy to the group at large.
I was fuming. To announce your own milestone at someone else’s wedding is already bad. But to announce your pregnancy at a couples wedding who knows kids are not a guarantee?!
Of course, I couldn’t react how it wanted to because every other person in that room got babies when they wanted babies. No one got it. I walked away and totally ignored the group as they FaceTimed the couple to say congrats. And of course, we are happy for them, but to put salt in an open wound during a special moment is almost unforgivable.
We saw that couple this past weekend, now a few more months pregnant. Plenty of insensitive things. One of which referring to how expensive it is to purchase things for said baby. I’m pretty sure I made a comment at that - we’ve already got you beat. Aka - Please be thankful for what you have!
A friend of mine (also struggling with infertility) and I now jokingly call those babies “Free Babies”. It makes me laugh because what else is there?
@almunday I totally hear you. I have withdrawn from a friend who knows what we have been going through and decided to spring her pregnancy on me when we were meeting for drinks. I honestly couldn't understand it. I would never be so insensitive. There were other ways she could have gone about it.
None of this is fair. Whatsoever. We have just decided to move on to IVF because I can't take it anymore. I am falling apart more and more by the day.
None of this is fair. Whatsoever. We have just decided to move on to IVF because I can't take it anymore. I am falling apart more and more by the day.
. Honestly that hurt