I don’t get it

[malvina]

@15gb2 This sounds completely ridiculous but hear me out.

9 hour time change. lol. We lived in the Middle East for the first 18ish months of my son’s life and came back to the USA to visit family every 6-8 months. Resetting the clock every so often prevented a lot of the major sleep regression’s.

Now that we’ve been home for a year ( and for good) , I dread daylight savings now.

 

[shinygreenapple]

@15gb2 We always have and still do operate on a bit of a schedule (more of a routine at this point, 13months) and for me it provided more freedom. I ebf so I wasn't counting oz but I did follow wake windows pretty strictly. I thought of it more like being 2 steps ahead of her. Most people thought I was too strict before we moved to one nap, but at the same time I could make plans with pin pointed accuracy and if something didn't work out with my babys sleep needs....I just didn't do it, or found a work around. I straight up used to stopwatch her wakewindows but I did that because I 100% go time blind and lose myself completely. 2.5hrs can happen in a blink and it's a nightmare being in a grocery lineup with an overestimated baby and still 45 mins from her crib, realistically. It was my Era to prioritize her sleeping so i did. Sometimes this meant staying home because we missed the window to leave the house and casually get back in time, other times it meant leaving for something like 1.5 hours early so she'd sleep in the car and wake up on site ready to party. To each their own. We are on a time based routine now where lunch time and nap are always at the same time but wakeup and bedtime shifts a little bit give or take 1 hr each day

 

[15gb2]

@shinygreenapple I have to be diligent about watching the clock too! My life is 100% based around her naps so I totally relate

 

[purple78]

@15gb2 With my first, I had no sense of schedules or wake windows and breastfed on demand. He slept great at night but naps were extremely difficult and going by "sleepy cues" ended up with a lot of rocking, false starts and days where he barely napped at all. Around I think 6 months I tried the 2-3-4 schedule and it worked immediately. Consistent naps with minimal help. I think I was missing his cues (or he didn't really have any) and offering naps at the wrong times, when he either wasn't tired yet or was overtired. It wasn't so much imposing a schedule on him as figuring out when he was actually tired and wanting to sleep. When naps would get difficult for several days+, I would look up if it might be time to drop a nap and change the schedule and then do trial and error on it.

With my second, I did a lot of contact naps for the first 4 months, but by 12 weeks I started trying out a loose schedule based on wake windows. I never made him sleep, it just helped me know when to TRY to get him to sleep. It was a huge benefit for my mental health because I wasn't spending hours every day trying to get him to nap at the wrong times like I did with my first. After 4 months we kept the schedule but transitioned to crib naps. He still has a pretty consistent schedule now at 10 months.

With my kids, they seem to be on the higher end of sleep needs. They don't really nap in the car well and don't do well if we move or skip naps. It makes things challenging at times, especially if the naps aren't at convenient times, but it works for us. The stress of having a tired baby is worse for me than being stuck on a schedule.

For feeding, like I said I breastfed my oldest on demand as you are describing and I fed him constantly for a long time. I think it was messing with his nap routine too. With my second, he was bottle fed so I had to track ounces for pumping and feeding, but I wasn't feeding him constantly. I tracked sleep and feeding for both in the same app so I can compare them easily. I really think for me, on demand feeding without tracking, feeding to sleep and having no sense of when to attempt naps made things really stressful and made that time really hard for me. Having a more consistent schedule later with my oldest and then early on with my second seemed to make things a lot better both for me AND for the baby.

 

[15gb2]

@purple78 This makes complete sense to me, thank you for such a thorough response! I’ve never heard of the 2-3-4 schedule before I’ll have to try that

 

[thatsallfolks]

@15gb2 How old is your baby? That may have a lot to do with it! I ended up using Huckleberry Sweet Spot to estimate nap times starting around 10 weeks and that has shaped our schedule. He still eats every 2ish hours like he did before the schedule, we just do eat > play > sleep and that’s been enough of a schedule for us. Turns out I wasn’t accurately spotting his sleepy cues before. But also keep in mind that every baby is different and what you’re doing is perfect for your baby as long as you both are happy!

 

[15gb2]

@thatsallfolks I wonder if I’m missing sleepy cues as well. She’s about to turn 5 months so definitely old enough to have a routine which she does. She’s just so strong willed she only does things on her terms so I’ve always been so confused by those posts lol

 

[butterscoth]

@15gb2 In short, sleep training that is seemingly pushed by everything on the internet. And apps.

We didn’t bother, we took the r/possumssleepprogram approach of following baby’s lead. It was way less stressful and felt like we could live our lives.

Do what works for you.

 

[akajshdj]

@15gb2 I never figured out wake windows are, but my kids just kind of dictated their own schedules, it changes naturally to longer naps on their own. I exclusively pumped for my first and he ate exactly what I produced which was ounces. My second was able to breastfeed and followed along with a natural schedule and gained weight along the same trajectory as her brother, she was much more demanding though. I think perhaps instead of being called wake windows they were called nap schedules but both kids did them naturally.
Then again neither of my kids have ever declined sleep. I think wake windows are an idea of following a baby natural rhythms, that is following a strict schedule.

My son wanted to sit back and watch everything and my daughter was very upset until she could walk and could participate. You could not put her in a stroller.