My pregnancy was horrible. I was sick the entire 34 weeks i was pregnant and so exhausted I could barely even work a part time job, and got nothing done around the house. I had the baby early in a traumatic way and the birth was horrible and it took a long time to heal, the dr said my birth was like a bomb exploded in my vagina lol. Postpartum was rough, I was in so much pain healing and trying to learn my baby and I also had so much anxiety and depression that I had to go on medication and I thought we had made a huge mistake thinking we could have a baby. I was more miserable than I’ve ever been. All I wanted was for my baby to be out of the newborn stage so we would start feeling less chaotic and more natural and move on with our lives. I never wanted to go through that again- not trying to conceive, not pregnancy, not childbirth, not taking care of a newborn. I even made posts here about how I never ever ever wanted to go through this again and my baby was sure to be an only child because I was NOT having another baby. Now my baby is almost no longer a newborn…we are almost there… and all I can think of is I wish I could get pregnant again right away
@relaxbuddy It's amazing how things change. We're at 4 months and I'm already forgetting some parts of the black hole that was the newborn stage (I think mostly due to ptsd), and I was so miserable the entire time. I still have tough days, but overall it's going much better.
@relaxbuddy Oh im so glad to hear this. We’re at 1 week and 2 days and the nights where she doesn’t sleep at all are breaking us. I feel so miserable and hopeless sometimes.
@relaxbuddy So I don't know about the newborn baby amnesia, but as far as pregnancy I have a theory. When I was pregnant I knew I was pregnant with my baby but I didn't know her yet. Now I know who I was going through all of that for, and in hindsight it hates things a lot differently for me
@relaxbuddy you and me both. i was MISERABLE the entire pregnancy (everyone who said the misery ended after the first trimester, although well intentioned, got dagger eyes from me). i still haven't slept longer than seven hours because i am an exclusive pumper.
and here i am thinking, another one wouldn't be so bad.
@relaxbuddy I loved my pregnancy 2nd and 3rd trimester. But the first was a living nightmare, 24 /7 nausea unrelenting for something like 2 months straight maybe a bit more. Weeks in bed moaning nibbling on dry baked potato and watching reality tv.
Plus puking on average every one to three days (so not daily except during week 8 when I would throw up sometimes 3x per day).
That is to say I think my pregnancy was probably pretty average- worst than some people’s and probably easier than others. And I still resolved that this was hands down the worst thing I have ever experienced and if we wanted another kid my partner could do it he was like um ok.
Newborns stage awful! Terrible hormones weeping for days on end fighting with each other because we are just So.Tired.
Baby is now 19 weeks and suddenly I’m tracking my ovulation??? Why!!!! It’s so bonkers. It doesn’t make sense. My partner thinks I’ve lost my mind. We are also older and needed IUI to get pregnant so I’m basically half delusional. Lol
@jessicastone I also am older and did an IUI… I keep thinking maybe it’ll happen accidentally the second time around, making the decision easier for us
@soul_tsunami Are you me lol I have had that thought like 50 times at this point. Best part??? We aren’t even having sex literally have had sex maybe 3 times since baby was born . how I think I’ll miraculously get pregnant …who knows
@relaxbuddy I spent 2.5 years in therapy before we decided to try for another child. He's 3 months now and perfect, but my pregnancy and delivery were far more difficult with him than his older sister.
@relaxbuddy I feel the same way right now with a 4 week old. Today I broke down and I feel anxiety taking over me and just feel so nervous. It feels like it will never end.
@justicem That’s exactly how I felt at 2 to 4 weeks I kind of hate it. When people told me hang in there it will get better. Because it just felt like such a long time but they were right honestly, it doesn’t get better and looking back now it didn’t really feel as long as it seemed.
@justicem Yes I felt the same! It feels like it'll never be better, but once he finally got to the social smile and laughing stage the screaming rage potato he was seems like it was forever ago. I spent a lot of time bouncing with him in the yoga ball when he was really fussy as well back then.
@relaxbuddy I had a similar experience with a super traumatic birth and very rough newborn days with my first baby. I never thought I could ever do it again for so many reasons. Well, he’s turning 3 at the end of June and his sister will be 2 months old tomorrow. I’m done this time I swear. Probably. Almost definitely.
@relaxbuddy I'm finding the newborn phase so much harder the second time around. Our first is 3y8m and I adore him. The first time around I didn't know what I was missing but now I can't wait for baby to be 3 and have a personality. Instead he's all need.
@relaxbuddy Birthing experience was quite beautiful to me. And right away I said I wanted another little human being. But now being in the trenches of PPA & PPD (if he's a little being on developmental milestones, I get so anxious...), I think for me personally better not. But if I had a very supportive partner, I would do it again.
