@dinkold Toddlers are capable of a frankly terrifyingly overgrown level of hunting/gathering competence, coupled with the impulse control of, well, a toddler. My little gal started popping avocados, unbidden, into the basket of my shopping cart the other day at the store where they're super expensive while telling me "we need avocados", and when I told her nope, we've still got a few at home we need to use up, she looked me dead in the eye and switched to "I need avocados" while still reaching for another.
Hunt, gather, parent
- Thread starter joshdons
- Start date
redeemed121
New member
@dinkold I had SUCH a hard time with narrating. The relief I felt when I read hunt gather parent and realized I wasn't ruining my child by not narrating was insane. It just never felt right to me and I'm not an extremely extroverted/social person to begin with and talking all. Day. Long. At my son was EXHAUSTING. I stop narrating, full stop, and just talk to him normally, like a normal human
@dinkold I definitely plan to stop narrating asap—it felt so bizarre to begin with but I’d been told how good it was for language acquisition so I forced it, but now I’m in the habit and I actually hate it!
And I have seen Old Enough and think it’s great
I mostly worry the car culture in my area is just too different from Japan or the Netherlands to let my kid roam free…
And I have seen Old Enough and think it’s great
I mostly worry the car culture in my area is just too different from Japan or the Netherlands to let my kid roam free…cameronb67
New member
@joshdons Your comment about narration raises a point that’s always been interesting to me. Since so much of the way that parents in the book operate is predicated on societies that look very different from ours, to what degree should we as parents be stepping in to fill the gap of the village?
For example, I, like Michaeleen, hate playing pretend with my four year old. It’s super exhausting and boring to me. But in many other societies she would have other kids to play with for large swaths of the day. So I worry that by depriving her of imaginative play (which she almost never wants to engage in alone at this point), I’m doing her a disservice. I’m not sure that I’m right to worry but I do anyway.
Same goes for narration. In many societies, a young child would hear human speech as the primary caregivers communicate with others throughout the course of the day. But in many American households, a young child may be alone with the mother, or another caregiver or baby, all day long. So then I start to wonder if speaking to the baby becomes more important. I mean it still feels weird sometimes, but it’s already a weird setup to begin with.
Hope I’m making sense. I just think it’s interesting to think about. I don’t have an answer for any of these questions other than it’s exhausting to be the whole village.
For example, I, like Michaeleen, hate playing pretend with my four year old. It’s super exhausting and boring to me. But in many other societies she would have other kids to play with for large swaths of the day. So I worry that by depriving her of imaginative play (which she almost never wants to engage in alone at this point), I’m doing her a disservice. I’m not sure that I’m right to worry but I do anyway.
Same goes for narration. In many societies, a young child would hear human speech as the primary caregivers communicate with others throughout the course of the day. But in many American households, a young child may be alone with the mother, or another caregiver or baby, all day long. So then I start to wonder if speaking to the baby becomes more important. I mean it still feels weird sometimes, but it’s already a weird setup to begin with.
Hope I’m making sense. I just think it’s interesting to think about. I don’t have an answer for any of these questions other than it’s exhausting to be the whole village.
@cameronb67 I think you're totally right to ask these questions. I think one of the great things about a book like this is that it sparks so much thought and gives you a new perspective. Are there any other similar age kids will live nearby that you could have come over? Do some babysitting if other kids? I'm a big believer that watching multiple slightly-older kids is easier than watching a single child.
cameronb67
New member
@brione I’ve been trying really hard to make that happen. People really keep to themselves here, and I’ve gotten to the point where if I see a kid in our neighborhood I almost feel like a creep cuz I’ll linger around and wait for their parents so that I can try chatting. I do have a neighbor about fifteen blocks away who has a similarly aged kid and we have been trying to get them together. I won’t give up, honestly, this is very important to me. I grew up the child of immigrants and was very isolated and I don’t want the same for my kids.