HoW WiLl I hIdE tHaT i'M nOt DrInKiNg

@ayrus87 My close friends know why I'm not drinking. Thank goodness for working from home because happy hours would be another issue. Other than that I just tell people I'm on antibiotics and no one questions anything lol

Its amazing how many people have problems with others not drinking.

Good luck on your journey
 
@ayrus87 Girl same, I didn't drink the first month of trying and was so mad when I didn't get my participation baby. Wishing you good luck and a short stay here :)
 
@ayrus87 My sister would have her husband drink a beer in a dark bottle, then she rinsed that out and filled that with water and sipped it. There’s probably trace beer residue but that’s not gonna hurt anything. I’m intensely private so I would totally try that to avoid scrutiny.
 
@ayrus87 Ohhh noooo I’m so sorry. What a rough week.

For future reference, there are new non-alcoholic products that some bars are carrying these days and can use to make a non-alcoholic cocktail. Two brands I can think of are Seedlip and Ritual. Call ahead and ask if they carry either of those or can order in.
 
@ayrus87 I am definitely nervous about this, especially with my MIL and SIL since we often pop open some wine (sometimes in the middle of the afternoon!) when we visit.

Someone upthread mentioned this, but my plan is to say im participating in Dry January because I feel gross and overindulgent after the holidays (not a lie), and then I will just say it went so well that I want to continue it in the later months. Obviously doesn’t work right away, but Dry January is fairly common so I don’t think it would rouse suspicion. At least not right away.
 
@ayrus87 If you drink wine you can get wine flavored water enhancers . I believe they sell flavors like rose at Walmart. Bring our own twist cap bottle of “wine” and go crazy.
 
@ayrus87 This is me too 😅 Seeing my In-laws for the first time in forever. We’re going to a beach house for a long weekend. Husband and I started brainstorming weeks ago of how to hide me not drinking. Well I’m 11dpo with another bfn and spotting already started. Yay!

At least I can drink. My mil is ready to jump at any chance she gets to guess I’m pregnant so that should keep those questions at bay. And I know I’ll get super sad if she does say anything bc this weekend is when I planned to share the news before I miscarried.
 
Everyone has such good ideas! I'll tuck them away for the future. I'm sure most people don't care whether you drink or not, but when I've abstained from drinking at family gatherings with my in laws in the past just because I've felt like it, I've gotten "OMG are you pregnant?!"
 
@ayrus87 This happened to me two cycles ago. Spotting on day 9 I was like ohhhh maybe? No. Full AF day 10 what in the living F. So mad...

Hope you feel better soon! You're not alone.
 
@ayrus87 Why hide you arent? I wish it was more normal for people to share why they aren't drinking - I don't really drink ever because I always feel crap after and have sinus problems in the morning. But a few of my friends decided to stop because it was a problem for them and are open about that with their friends.

You don't have to give details but I think saying you've decided to not drink for the time being is more normal and healthy than pretending or hiding not drinking . Don't make awkward secrets for yourself! but you don't have to give away everything either - you can just say you don't want to drink because you're trying to focus on your health, which is true. Not a big deal :)

It also might mean your friends might want to do more activities with you that aren't surrounded by a context of social drinking which honestly would be better for the whole world haha
 
Fyi- I'm not going out raging in a bar hotspot during the pandemic if that's what people think I mean. I meant 4 coworkers outside following guidelines, our work even does prevalency testing (we work in research, including vaccines) and where I live, our governor is not an idiot. Also I was generally talking about this situation in the past and hopefully in the future about having to hide ttc from nosy nellies.
 
@noodle7 Same. I don’t mean to be rude, but I thought that I was on an old old post for a minute. I’m going to assume that they’re in a place where the pandemic isn’t/wasn’t as bad and be happy for them that whatever their government is has everything under control.
 
@ayrus87 We’re going home for 2 weeks at Christmas/New Years.

My plan is to either say I’m dieting (as they’re familiar with) or that I had a drinking fest with the opposite family side that today I am trying to recover from (and this is coming from myself who is known for having a good time with drinking and touring love for all different types of alcoholic beverages 😅)
 
@ayrus87 HA! same gal. I have a wedding this weekend and am the MOH. I was so nervous I was pregnant and would 'ruin' the brides day by everyone knowing I was pregnant because I wasn't drinking. Luckily, AF to the rescue!!! (sarcasm)
 
@ayrus87 I went to a wedding during my last pregnancy (that ended in MC) and had my boyfriend order me seltzer with lemon at the bar. No one noticed! Also if anyone wanted me to taste their drinks I took fake sips (this was pre Covid obviously!)
 
@ayrus87 Bring some ingredients to make a specialized cocktail. Make sure that you or your husband make a batch for everyone, and while doing so, make a special drink for you of one that looks the same with no alcohol in it
 
@ayrus87 Sometimes it can work to speak with your server or the bar privately and tell them to make any cocktail you order virgin. I've done this and ordered gin and tonics at a work function that were just sprite and lime.
 
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