Gentle C Section

[zienzieu]

@pringles24 I've had two c sections, one emergency and one planned because of breach. For the planned one, I requested the warm blankets for my chest because the first time I was shaking and cold (I think it has something to do with the surgery). I also let them know that I was very nauseated the first time and requested anti nausea drugs. I was able to do skin to skin both times and I think delayed cord clamping the second time. Planned was really nice. It was a really fun, happy atmosphere in the OR, perfect for bringing a baby into the world into. It was also calmer, so I really heard my baby's first cry.

I did have trouble both times peeing after the catheter was removed. An awesome nurse gave me the tip of sitting in a warm sitz bath and that did the trick

 

[katrina2017]

@pringles24 I've had two c-sections and both were positive experiences. The first, I knew I wasn't going to be allowed to go into labor because she was measuring very small. Still I wasn't expecting to go into surgery when I did - we went in for monitoring, they kept me overnight, and in the morning they decided to get me on the schedule for that day. The second time I was hoping for a VBAC but we had a section scheduled for my due date. After 48 hours of prodromal labor I begged them to get me in a day early (and they did).

In both cases I didn't look - it was a nice opaque curtain and I think that's better for me.

Delayed cord clamping us industry standard in most places but had I requested an extra minute or two I'm sure it would have been honored.

Same with music, I wanted the surgeon to pick whatever worked for them but I'm sure they would have honored a request. They were generally happy to talk with me and fill me in on what was happening.

As for immediate skin to skin - I guess I'm not sure how this would have worked. They still have to deal with the placenta and stitch you up, they also need to get you out of the operating room because it'll be someone else's turn. Then you wind up waiting in a limbo area for like an hour to make sure you come off the anesthesia a bit. I don't think either hospital I went to would have allowed the baby to be in that space.

In my case the first baby had to go to the nicu, the second went to our room with her dad and I joined as soon as I could.

I'd say the experiences were relaxed, and largely unsurprising and unrushed, and I think I was less exhausted than a lot of moms who have days of labor but like - it's still a pretty gnarly surgery. You're still in a shiny sterile operating room, laid out on a stainless steel table, wearing a hair net. Have a talk w your OB about what is realistic to expect and what is not, they should make you feel better.

 

[skelly]

@pringles24 My first birth was traumatic with a lonbhg physical recovery too, and choose a gentle, elective c section.

We had immediate skin to skin bonding, with delayed cord clamping. I held her the entire time I was being sewn back up. I held her the entire time in recovery until I could feel my legs. I held her the entire time until I was in my room with her and my husband.

I think the best thing I did was gather all the information I could going into it, and be knowledgeable about the procedure. We were calm and together the whole time. My husband held my hand every moment.

And I have to say, just as another Mama who had a rough birth, and still hold trauma about it, and grieve it... I was shocked by how beautiful, calm, and safe I felt with my csection.

My doctors and whole team were lovely, empathetic and encouraging. I had no pain, and was shocked by how fast I recovered. I wept at how easy this second birth felt, and felt grief anew about how painful and long the recovery of my first felt.

I hope your second birth is a gentle csection, and you feel calm and empowered.

 

[pringles24]

@skelly So many great and helpful comments here, but this one made me cry. I have moved past the trauma of feeling 100% of the pain of my extensive surgical repair, and I’ve finally recovered physically, and I’ve forgiven the doctor who injured me unnecessarily, but I haven’t been able to move past those feelings of not feeling safe.

Thank you for making me feel seen and understood, I really appreciate this so much.

 

[simondarok]

@pringles24 What is a c section horror story?

I had a planned c section and while I would have been down for a clear drape, it was a definite no-go for my husband who would have probably passed out. I think delayed cord clamping is the default now? I didn’t do immediate skin to skin (honestly I would have been nervous trying to hold him while totally supine like that) but I did it in recovery and my husband was there by my head holding our baby immediately after birth.

Honestly my birth was perfect. It was a pretty standard c section and I cannot stress how much of a touchy feely lovey bonded mama I am but still don’t feel like I missed out. He’s a toddler now and we have an extremely cuddly relationship.

Do whatever feels right for you! Hopefully someone can share experiences with those things

 

[humbled1]

@simondarok I have two unplanned c-sections and both of them were pretty horrific in their own way. Not the recovery, but the actual procedures.

Failed epidurals are at the center of both though.

 

[perplexedathiest]

@simondarok I had an emergency c-section and I absolutely have a horror birth story lol

 

[pringles24]

@simondarok I hope my phrasing didn’t come off as insensitive to c section parents; if I caused any offense, please forgive me! I have had two friends who had really traumatic c sections; one planned, one urgent. The friend with the planned c section experienced a total disregard for her personhood during her surgery— doctors not explaining what was happening to her, joking and talking about their weekends and not acknowledging her presence, forcefully removing the baby so quickly without telling her he was coming out and immediately passing (healthy) baby off to nurses and then eventually dad, despite her asking to see the baby— she had to wait over 20 minutes before anyone brought him to her, and her arms were strapped down. She just felt very violated; I’d like to avoid an experience like that if possible, and felt maybe expressing my preferences and asking some specific questions to my OB might help me steer us all in the “right” direction.

Edited to add that I don’t feel “missing out” on some of my birth preferences makes for any more/less of a connected relationship with baby. I exclusively formula fed from birth, and I have one of the most “attached” toddlers you’ll ever meet.

 

[simondarok]

@pringles24 Hey, I’m sorry your friend had that experience.

The OR staff were chatting throughout my surgery but it didn’t make me uncomfortable - it actually set my (normally anxious leaning) husband at ease as well because he realized how routine this was for everyone.

I will admit to being a lot more at ease in medical settings than most women (and certainly more than most women as crunchy as I am) so I’m sure that influenced things. My focus and attention was on my husband as the person supporting me. Once I heard a strong cry and saw my baby I had just huge relief. So that was my personal experience.

Also no offence taken! I just know some moms can get in their head worrying about the birth experience so I just wanted to put it out there!

I have heard some moms request that like off topic chatter be avoided. Personally I think these things can be quite psychological so I don’t like to psych people out on their job if that makes sense.

 

[pringles24]

@simondarok It makes sense that some of these preferences vary based on your personality and what might help you feel calm; thanks for elaborating. I think I just have some real hang ups after my last delivery where I was basically steamrolled into a delivery that my current OB has said included so many unnecessary interventions and questionable medical decisions that left me with a permanent injury and a very real fear of experiencing that type of environment ever again. I know I can’t control everything, but knowing a little more about what to expect and what might be realistic to request makes me feel safer!

 

[hedowns]

@simondarok My first birth was a c-section horror story. This isn’t the thread for it, but a doctor who didn’t see me as human just as an incubator was at the center of it.

 

[askjulieann]

@pringles24 I called for a c-section before our birth most likely ended up as an emergency one. I was overall happy with my experience but I wish I planned a little more and had them put on music. I also wish I asked for more information about what was going on. She was separated from us for 15-30 minutes because her cord was wrapped twice. I think they had to do some testing on her. All I know is that she pooped twice in that time.

 

[maryannmaria]

@pringles24 My emergency C-section was about as positive as it could be. I didn’t want to see through the curtain, but we did delayed cord clamping, immediate skin-to-skin while they were sewing me up, and they let me play calming music the entire time. I still remember the song that played as I held my daughter for the first time. It was beautiful.

They took her for 15-20 minutes to weigh her and all that jazz, and by then I was ready for the recovery room. I held her and nursed her for the first time there before being released to our room a few hours later.

My only complaint was that the nurse bathed my daughter for the first time when I was using the restroom. I came out and they were almost done.

 

[pringles24]

@maryannmaria This is so helpful to read and gives me a really hopeful and realistic way to view this process! Thanks for sharing.

 

[crazysuicude]

@pringles24 I had been planning to give birth in a birth center but ended up in the hospital for a C section. Because it was an emergency C section, I could still feel a lot of the operation although it wasn’t painful. I found this really disturbing. One of the benefits of a planned C section, as I understand, is that you can’t feel anything. I personally would not opt for the clear screen although that’s just me.

 

[3angels]

@pringles24 Oof, I'm not going into my c-section experience, but it didn't seem gentle. I'm still a little bitter over it.

Holy hell, do not have a clear curtain. I've seen pics the nurses took from the side and it's shocking to me now, 19 months later, seeing it then would have pushed me over the edge.

 

[pringles24]

@3angels My (limited!) understanding is that they partially lower the drape and switch to clear curtain during the birth; you’re not able to see your incision, but you are able to view the baby as they’re lifted from your body. It sounds similar to my vaginal delivery; I didn’t watch myself push her out, but raised my head to see her being lifted up and placed on my chest.

Definitely not for everyone, but in theory I’d like to see it happen!

 

[qody]

@pringles24 I had what you've described except I begged for a sheet so I didn't have to see her come out.

I am very glad I had a C. For me, in Covid/2021 and not being able to have my doula there, I would not have wanted to labor. The unexpected nature of that, with my anxiety... no. I would do it again and in many ways it was really beautiful.

I was given the choice to hold her right away but I didn't because I was shaking so much. I really just wanted them to finish my incision so I could focus. I was unbelievably thirsty. The thirst was the worst part, the shaking and thirst. It was a very special time for my husband and daughter, though, and my daughter and I had our moment in the recovery room soon after.

If I did it again I would walk through the procedure multiple times with every doc involved. I asked for an anti-anxiety on the day and was given Gravol without consent. I hate Gravol and it is not an anti-anxiety. Things like that. Some of them let you play music.

 

[pringles24]

@qody A friend of mine requested to avoid a specific medication, was given it anyway, and was basically unconscious through her delivery (not a c section; but an induction). Tips like this are exactly what I’m looking for— I’d never think to mention that I react poorly to some anxiety and nausea meds, but now I know I need to flag that! Thank you.

 

[qody]

@pringles24 My absolute pleasure! Talk it ALL out. If/thens, all of it.