Gentle C Section

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pringles24

New member
Hey friends! I love this sub and have learned so much from you, I thought this might be a great place to gather insight and encouragement before the birth of our second child in August.

I’ll be having my first ever c section this fall. My doctor is on board for what I’ve learned is referred to as a “gentle” c section, with immediate skin to skin, delayed cord clamping, and a clear drape or mirror so I can watch our baby come into the world.

With that said, I’m a bit on edge after our 2021 delivery (my preference would have been a home birth with a midwife, but I risked out of midwifery care and had a hospital delivery with so many unnecessary interventions which resulted in a 4th degree tear and incredibly challenging physical recovery). Im totally on board with a c section but really, really want to make sure my preferences are understood and followed as long as it’s safe for the medical team to do so.

The thing is, I’m just not sure what my preferences might be, other than “please don’t separate me and baby, and please don’t let me turn into one of those c section horror stories.”

Has anyone here had a “gentle” c section and would be willing to share the details or even a list of birth preferences they shared with their medical team? Likewise, any c section parents who, looking back on their delivery, know what they’d advocate for if they could do it all over again?

Hoping to strike a balance between a calm, connected birth for our baby and listening to the advice of our wonderful doctor who knows a lot more about these things than I do; a moderately granola delivery, if you will!
 
@pringles24 I had a planned c-section and asked both my OB and MFM about having a “gentle” c-section. They both replied with the same exact answer. There is no such thing as a gentle c-section and it’s major surgery. The health and safety of myself and baby were top priority. With that said, I explained toy OB the components of the “gentle” C-section that I wanted, immediate skin to skin being the big one. She was very on board and said that it was routine and her goal for all planned, low risk c-sections. She told me that as soon as she knew she could maintain a sterile surgical field, I would have baby on my chest. In the mean time, she recommended that my husband do the skin to skin.

While I am jealous of my husband getting those first few early moments while my OB was working on getting me put back together. I was able to watch my husband hold our little girl and just ooh and aww over her. Going back through the time stamps on photos, she was in my arms 15 minutes after birth, which seems like an eternity in theory, but there was a lot going on in the moment. (Note, I also had a slight, non-life threatening complication.)

With all that said, we did realize that in terms of having a gentle C-section, the nurse 100% matters. I had a very old school nurse who was retiring that week and in pre-op when explaining to her our preference for immediate skin to skin we had to be very insistent and use the phrase “my OB said this is what we would do”. Even still, in the operating room, my husband had to be a vocal advocate.
 
@livegood I hadn’t realized my husband could be a backup option for skin to skin in the OR until seeing some of the helpful comments on this thread; excited at that possibility (and tbh it makes sense that this might be the best move, as I have no idea how I’ll feel while having my internal organs reassembled).
 
@pringles24 Another thing to consider is that some drs might not be comfortable with immediate skin to skin alongside delayed clamping. My Dr wouldn’t let us do skin to skin until it was cut bc it would compromise the sterile field. You’re sitting there open the whole time. We made it to like 4 min 30 seconds of delayed clamping before I just needed her to start stitching me up, and then as soon as the cord was cut, she was able to pass over the baby.
 
@branannabanana Probably a dumb question, and this is probably not something everyone would want but could they lift out the placenta with baby attached for the delayed cord clamping and finalise the c at that point?
 
@foundsomefunnies You lose the benefits of delayed clamping once placenta is no longer attached to mom. Unless you want to keep baby attached to placenta for a photo op or something, or do a lotus birth type situation.
 
@pringles24 I also had a semi-emergency C-section like others here. My husband got to have skin-to-skin with baby in the OR. I think they gave me the option to see through the curtain (which I strongly declined).
 
@livegood Yes. Be under no illusion that it is major surgery, and realistically nothing “gentle” about it. You can have someone advocate for you of course, but it is real medical trauma.
 
@pringles24 I asked for a C vs being induced since I assumed I would have a difficult labor/be forced into an emergency C. As my DR was elbow deep in me she said we made the right decision.

I didn't have a clear curtain but my husband could look. The nurse also took my phone and took photos DURING the procedure. They are Live Photos and sometimes I wish I hadn't seen them? They are a little grotesque and there's SO much blood. Just be ready for it.

They did a delayed cord clamp and gave him to me right away to hold on to. I was mostly closed when they finally took him for weighing. I was able to hold him up to recovery as well.
 
@pringles24 I haven’t had a c section but have observed one and would recommend against a clear drape if you’re squeamish or worried about seeing blood. The surgeon has to move very quickly and exert a lot of force to safely deliver baby. Maybe they can hold up baby as some others have suggested?
 
@pringles24 I had a fantastic c section experience but did feel a little nauseous from nerves and not eating. I think I would have felt really "icky" if I could see anything bloody. And they held baby up for me to see really quickly so it would have only helped by like mere seconds. I'm not a squeamish person but I was already on edge. Overall fantastic experience though!
 
@jun4jesus Yeah, I’ve had two c-sections (one emergency, one planned) and even though I was sad I wouldn’t be able to see my baby brought into the world I honestly did not want to see the actual surgical procedure. I knew it would force me into like a state of disassociation which was a headspace I did not want to be in during my first moments with my little bub.
 
@pringles24 I had a c-section that was planned, but my water broke a few days before so it ended up being of the “urgent” variety.

My husband got to hold my baby first. I had such bad shakes from the drugs that I wouldn’t have been able to hold her but he brought her to me and we got to lay cheek to cheek while they stitched me up and then we did skin to skin and breastfeeding as soon as we got to the recovery room.

I wouldn’t want a clear drape. My husband accidentally looked when he went to go see our baby and I’m pretty sure he now has some ptsd from seeing all that blood and my mid drift sliced open. I think it’s not for everyone.

I had a friend make the music suggestion but honestly I think it would have been a distraction. I was so much more interested in being able to hear my daughter and everything that was going on. I’m sensitive to noise though so maybe it’s a me thing.
 
@njc82 Same re the shakes - the plan was for me to announce the gender and hold baby immediately for skin to skin, but I spiked a fever and was shaking so badly I couldn’t even tell what gender I was looking at, let alone hold the baby. Luckily my husband was prepared and he stripped his shirt off immediately to give the first cuddles. ❤️
 
@pringles24 I did my pregnancy with a hospital-affiliated nurse midwifery practice in the US. They were very anti-intervention, had traditional labor techniques, and encouraged my birth plan of “put off Epi as long as possible” (this was a pain management decision, not an anti-meds decision).

My son’s big ass head and my small-ass cervical opening meant after 12 hours of labor and 2 hours of pushing he wasn’t coming out. And I started getting a fever and my son’s temp was rising too, so we called it and I got what you wanted in a “gentle c-section” - immediate skin to skin, delayed cord clamping, video, pictures, husband present, etc. Baby was weighed and gently cleaned in the same room.

C-section went perfectly, didn’t feel a thing. Labor was what put me and son as risk.
 
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