For those of you who had options, what made you pick the SAHP life?
- Thread starter hew0007
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- stay-at-home parents
@hew0007 A lot of factors affected my decision. I was tenured and it was a considerable amount of work, we were doing wfh during the pandemic and I was still having difficulty doing everything. I've got two kids, a 4 and 2 yo and I was pulling 20 hr days sometimes. My husband makes an income we can budget within, so I decided to stay home. My department was an extremely toxic work environment so that contributed significantly.
It's tough right, if when I return to work, academia would be a non tenured appt. So...1k a credit hour, max like 30k a year in my area (current times obviously, who knows what it'll be 20 years from now). I've kind of had it with academia though, so I'd look for a returning employee program in industry.
It is a tough decision, and no right or wrong. I felt this was best for my kids and my family, so I am home. What's best for your kids and family will be totally different because you guys are different. It's a decision that can only be determined by you!
It's tough right, if when I return to work, academia would be a non tenured appt. So...1k a credit hour, max like 30k a year in my area (current times obviously, who knows what it'll be 20 years from now). I've kind of had it with academia though, so I'd look for a returning employee program in industry.
It is a tough decision, and no right or wrong. I felt this was best for my kids and my family, so I am home. What's best for your kids and family will be totally different because you guys are different. It's a decision that can only be determined by you!
@hew0007 I tried working (part time, from home) after my maternity leave and we were all miserable. My husband was because he also WFH, but was constantly on meetings and couldn’t help. Me because I felt like I was being pulled in 8 different directions; and my son because he just wanted to be held 
.
Daycare was never an option for us, I had horrible PPA around allowing others to care for our baby. A nanny sounded great but I had to decide if I wanted to stay home or hire a nanny. I just wanted to be home. I’m glad I tried going back to work, but I know I 100% made the right choice for our family.
Financially, my husband makes good money, is on a really great career path, and has had more than 1 promotion per year he’s worked. To replace what I’m able to do, we would have to hire a house cleaner, get groceries/meals delivered, and a nanny. That would be more than what I made working full time.
I have friends who are working moms and I love that that works for them! I think it’s such a personal family choice, and we are extremely lucky I’m able to stay home.
. Daycare was never an option for us, I had horrible PPA around allowing others to care for our baby. A nanny sounded great but I had to decide if I wanted to stay home or hire a nanny. I just wanted to be home. I’m glad I tried going back to work, but I know I 100% made the right choice for our family.
Financially, my husband makes good money, is on a really great career path, and has had more than 1 promotion per year he’s worked. To replace what I’m able to do, we would have to hire a house cleaner, get groceries/meals delivered, and a nanny. That would be more than what I made working full time.
I have friends who are working moms and I love that that works for them! I think it’s such a personal family choice, and we are extremely lucky I’m able to stay home.
beauty1993
New member
@hew0007 I am resigning. I’m a a turning point in my career as well, but I wanted to be a mom more than anything
& now is my time. I’m leaving a six figure salary to do it, it will be a major financial adjustment to go to 1 income (& we live in HCOL area, so that’s my biggest worry) but I’m Doing it. A leap of faith!
& now is my time. I’m leaving a six figure salary to do it, it will be a major financial adjustment to go to 1 income (& we live in HCOL area, so that’s my biggest worry) but I’m Doing it. A leap of faith!
rashida1980
New member
@hew0007 I’m a SAHM and if I had your options, I would not stay home. My job is always hiring, as long as you keep your license active you can return whenever you want.
Which was a huge thing that went into my decision. I’ve noticed a lot of stay at home moms I meet are nurses and teachers. It’s easy with both those jobs to get back into the game. My mom was a teacher who took 5 years off with me and my brothers and returned easily. I’m a nurse with a bachelors degree and half my masters. I can restart. Anywhere, anytime. There’s down sides to having a job that’s very in demand too (trust me), but being able to take a leave and return isn’t one of them.
Which was a huge thing that went into my decision. I’ve noticed a lot of stay at home moms I meet are nurses and teachers. It’s easy with both those jobs to get back into the game. My mom was a teacher who took 5 years off with me and my brothers and returned easily. I’m a nurse with a bachelors degree and half my masters. I can restart. Anywhere, anytime. There’s down sides to having a job that’s very in demand too (trust me), but being able to take a leave and return isn’t one of them.
greenteaandchocolatechips
New member
@hew0007 I also have a 7 month old and was in a similar situation. I worked really hard for my career and was finally in a great place and truly happy with my work. Then came baby. I had every intention to go back to work after a 12 month maternity leave, but when it came time I just couldn’t bear to leave her! This is my second child so that changed my perspective. When I had my first I was not in a position to stay home. I was in college and was really motivated to finish my degree. I was also not in a position financially to stay home. This time around everything was different. I would be lying if I said I didn’t occasionally miss work, but I truly have no regrets! These 7 months have been the best time of my life!! I didn’t know how I’d do as a SAHM but I really love it. I love being the one to do everything with my daughter. I love spending all this time with her and wouldn’t change it for the world. I tell my husband all the time that the greatest gift anyone has ever given me is the ability to spend this time with my daughter. I ultimately made the decision to stay home because I believe it’s never too late to get my career back on track but I will never be able to get this time back with my baby. This was a long response and I’m rambling now lol but just my two cents! Good luck with everything!