Anyone else not “crave adult interaction”?

[masihisatsang]

@porven I'm a child therapist. So no. Honestly, working with the parents of my child clients is the hardest part of the job. Needed, but harder.

 

[katrina2017]

@masihisatsang I was a teacher before becoming a SAHM and this is so true. Dealing with adults (parents, administrators, toxic colleagues) is hands down the hardest part of working with kids. Kids are challenging for sure but their behaviors are usually developmentally appropriate and, unlike adults, kids always keep it real which is so refreshing. I'd much rather deal with a kid tantrum than an adult tantrum.

 

[sweetsocalbutterfly2019]

@porven I wouldnt say I crave “adult interaction” but I certainly don’t feel a ton of satisfaction from cleaning lol. Cooking I do but only for a special occasion. Regular dinner? Nah. That’s just a chore.

I am almost addicted to profesional achievement and progression tho. So yeah, that’s far more satisfying to me than home stuff. But everyone’s different! I never wished to be the other way.

 

[biggsandwedge]

@sweetsocalbutterfly2019 Same. Not that I love work per se, but I do love being challenged and achieving, and cooking and cleaning just don’t cut it.

 

[bob]

@porven I work from my basement and love having eight hours daily of NO human interaction lol! I agree that I find so much more joy now with having a happy home with healthy, happy kids than way over-performing at work (still a perfectionist and work very hard but I just don’t get as much satisfaction from it anymore). I love WFH so I can choose which adults I interact with instead of Janice from two departments over who always was passive aggressively trying to undermine projects, etc!

 

[lchelling1029]

@porven 1000%. My job is teaching kindergarten, so going to work really doesn’t give me all that much adult interaction anyway!

 

[samir123]

@porven I wonder if your perspective is shaped by the fact that maternity leaves are very short and you are kind of baby love drunk through it anyway? After a couple weeks and back to capitalism for you.

I wonder how you would feel if you had to go through long, extended periods without adult interaction? When I hear people missing it it’s mostly from the group that has been doing it for a long time.

Personally I love having adult interaction but I always feel like my maternity leave is too short. I feel like I’m ripped away from my tiny baby too early. I think having 6m maternity would be perfect for me and then I’m craving adult interaction again.

 

[porven]

@samir123 Yes I often wonder this! Maybe I really value it more than I realize, I just never get the chance to miss it….

 

[waterfall]

@porven I’ve been a SAHM for 6 years and I do miss adult interaction. I don’t think I missed it at first when I quit my job but now that I’ve been out of work so long so realize I really thrive on that connection. Of course being with my children is more important and That’s why I choose this but it does get damn lonely. I barely talk to my husband because he’s tired after work and parenting. My friends are busy all the time with their own kids and families. When I do get together with other moms we barely get conversation in without interruption. I wouldn’t trade this for anything but I miss just bs ing with colleagues or clients about things (restaurants, pop culture, life, relationships, etc).

 

[ibui]

@waterfall When my kids were in elementary school I volunteered for every PTA committee I was interested in and I made a lot friends that way. I don’t know if they even still have a PTA anymore though.

 

[turtletowner]

@samir123 I was a SAHM for 8yrs and while I loved being home with my kids and wouldn’t trade that time for anything, my mental health did take a bit of a downturn. Being home for so many years, it does get lonely and for me, it’s not so much that I miss adult interaction but rather it’s good for me to be around it, for my mental health. I hated my previous job and knew I didn’t want to go back to that so I enrolled back into college to finish my bachelors. I’m ready and my kids are excited for me. Makes it that much more worth it for me

 

[lifeisagift]

@porven Im the total opposite!!

I crave the interaction as long as it isnt exhausting. Please just chill, massage my body whilst you sing a tune. Give me a foot rub. Help me stretch my legs out

 

[trinichristiannudist]

@porven The only time I've ever craved adult interaction was in March or April 2020. I was pregnant then and was so excited to talk to another human in-person when I went to my OB appointment. But since then, I haven't felt like I was missing adult interaction, even on maternity leave.

 

[yoursliceoflife86]

@porven I always say if I won the lotto, I would quit my job and never work again. Work sucks! But if I have to work, I do enjoy what I do more than any other job. I'm a post partum nurse so I do like interacting with new moms and taking care of newborns.

But when all is said and done, I prefer time with my family. I adore my kids, I love hanging out with my husband, and even when I stayed home for a year, I still spent plenty of time to hanging out with my friends. Most of my friends don't have kids and don't want to have kids, but they accept my boys. If I didn't have friends who were cool with my littles tagging along, I could see how I would crave adult attention from work though.

 

[crossroads100]

@porven Me too. Finally was able to leave my corporate finance job very recently and be a SAHM after literal years of wanting it so badly-cup is filled and I def don’t miss it one bit. Had two maternity leaves as trial runs and left right before my third maternity leave would have started.

 

[porven]

@crossroads100 Congratulations! How exciting for you

Edit to add-
My DREAM is to stop working when my youngest reaches kindergarten/1st grade. I’m telling myself that I have to work til then, and at that point I’ll either be able to stop OR I’ll be more senior and have a better feeling about my career.

 

[krugerdina]

@crossroads100 I am going to be leaving my corporate job in May to be a teaching assistant part time (while kids at school) and be home the rest of the time. I am counting the days. I told my husband I could go without pretty much any luxury to get a break.

 

[paulinderjeetkhokher]

@porven I wonder if some of this has to do with what being home feels like while knowing you have a job and financial security in the background. I liked being home and caring for my baby, organizing and managing the house, but I could still have all of the things that make my life easier and buy my baby the things I wanted to buy without worrying, because we had two incomes and my leave did not cause any financial strain on us. When I think about what staying home without working at all would look like, it does not seem fun. Not because I wouldn't love to be with my baby more, but because of how much more I would take on mental load and default parent wise, the pressure on my partner to earn and provide benefits on his own, and the limitations I would have on the kinds of food I want to buy, activities I want to do, etc. Reality for us just wouldn't allow an experience like the one I had during leave. But even if my husband's income was super high, I wouldn't like not having any professional role in the world or income potential, so there probably is a personality difference here. I wish both my partner and I could work 20hr a week with no change in salary

 

[porven]

@paulinderjeetkhokher Great points— I think you’re right. I should have said “I won’t stop working (for financial and other reasons)…”, because I do think it would change (for the worse) so much about our life/marriage/mental state.

I agree- wish I could work part time for full pay and still have daycare I guess who doesn’t, though!

 

[paulinderjeetkhokher]

@porven I totally get it. Like you said, we all wish we could have a better balance!