@liz555 I feel this so much. I was already kind of on the anti work train before having my 13 month old but now I’m really, really on it. I just could not care less about work and just want to lead a life of leisure with my family. I feel so burnt out all the time between work and family stuff that I struggle a lot. I am just overwhelmed with all of the responsibilities, information, things to do, things to learn with a new baby, it’s so much. My husband is great but also works full time with some travel and I just feel drained. We both make good money but not enough where one of us could just stop working and live the same life we do now (I’m the bread winner as well). It’s all just really hard and it’s making me just want to quit my job and rent kayaks on the beach or something.
Anyone else hate working?
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@liz555 I wish every day that I could be a SAHM with my baby (and soon to be baby 2 due in Aug). It crushes me that he gets to spend all this time with my mom and not me during the day while I sit in a cubicle at work.
My husband and I have gone through our finances multiple times and I have loops of just wanting to try to quit and make it work but I can't bring myself to do that when I don't think it's the right financial decision for our family.
Not sure where you are but being in the US SUCKS with the benefits piece and good benefits being through work most of the day (and expensive AF).
I completely relate to your post, I'm a combination of highly unmotivated but at the same time panicking about being let go ever because it's not just me dependent on my income
I wish there was more support for moms/families to allow people to stay home, at least for the first couple years!
My husband and I have gone through our finances multiple times and I have loops of just wanting to try to quit and make it work but I can't bring myself to do that when I don't think it's the right financial decision for our family.
Not sure where you are but being in the US SUCKS with the benefits piece and good benefits being through work most of the day (and expensive AF).
I completely relate to your post, I'm a combination of highly unmotivated but at the same time panicking about being let go ever because it's not just me dependent on my income
I wish there was more support for moms/families to allow people to stay home, at least for the first couple years!
@hjholland It’s so, so hard! Yeah I’m in the US, in Southern California it’s basically impossible to live here even with a double income.
it’s basically impossible to live here even with a double income.@hjholland That is such an out of touch thing to say. If my husband alone brought in $300k+, then maybe lol
@liz555 I’m with you. I’m only working because I have no choice. If my husband got a huge raise and we could live off of his income would throw my laptop out the window and never look back.
I’m very happy for all the working moms who genuinely love what they do and enjoy having a job, but that ain’t me.
I’m very happy for all the working moms who genuinely love what they do and enjoy having a job, but that ain’t me.
susieque22002
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@liz555 I work in an industry that filled with people who claim that they love and enjoy their job and that to do it well you have to genuinely care (health and social care in the UK).
I don't love and enjoy it, and I don't genuinely care about the people I support. I provide my service, then I go home, every month I get paid. I absolutely wouldn't do it or anything else if I didn't have to.
If I came into millions tonight, I wouldn't be going to work tomorrow. They wouldn't see me for dust.
I don't love and enjoy it, and I don't genuinely care about the people I support. I provide my service, then I go home, every month I get paid. I absolutely wouldn't do it or anything else if I didn't have to.
If I came into millions tonight, I wouldn't be going to work tomorrow. They wouldn't see me for dust.
@susieque22002 It’s funny because my coworkers and I actually had the conversation about whether or not we’d come to work if we won the lottery. I immediately said no and everyone looked at me like I was crazy! Sorry I just prioritize and value real life, not my office job.
littlefish31617
New member
@liz555 I am a teacher and I literally loathe working. I have to deal with shitty middle schoolers all damn day and then try to find the strength to end the second half of the day on a positive note with my toddler.
It angers me that I have to take care of other people’s poorly behaved children when I could be spending more time with mine.
It angers me that I have to take care of other people’s poorly behaved children when I could be spending more time with mine.
@littlefish31617 Oh man, props to you. Middle school seems like such a hard, frustrating age to have to deal with daily.
dcipheringtheword
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biblicalselfdefense
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@liz555 Part time work in a meaningful job is where it's at. Tbh, sales sounds like a pretty soulless job. My job is satisfying because I get to help people and even then I would rather be at home half the time. It's so hard to take care of yourself when you're working 40 hours a week. I wanted to cry on Tuesday when I had to leave my husband and child-- it was a beautiful morning and I would have loved to go for a nice long walk with them instead of going into work.
I was a sahm for a couple years, and it comes with its own set of existential hangups-- social media makes it seem like it's a lot of happily puttering around in the flower garden and cuddling with your kids in a spotless house when in reality, it feels a lot more like a job with endless food and endless messes to clean and pressure to give your kid all the structure and socialization they'd normally be getting at daycare. Plus you have to be a lot more budget conscious, and there's always the what-ifs hanging over your head, like "what if my husband died tomorrow?" which is a lot more intimidating to think about when you don't have a career.
I was happiest when I worked part time. I felt like it was the best of both worlds-- time, money, security, flexibility.
I was a sahm for a couple years, and it comes with its own set of existential hangups-- social media makes it seem like it's a lot of happily puttering around in the flower garden and cuddling with your kids in a spotless house when in reality, it feels a lot more like a job with endless food and endless messes to clean and pressure to give your kid all the structure and socialization they'd normally be getting at daycare. Plus you have to be a lot more budget conscious, and there's always the what-ifs hanging over your head, like "what if my husband died tomorrow?" which is a lot more intimidating to think about when you don't have a career.
I was happiest when I worked part time. I felt like it was the best of both worlds-- time, money, security, flexibility.
@liz555 Working at sucky jobs suck. Working at a decent job with decent flexibility? It’s fine.
Of course I’d rather go live in the woods and raise chickens with my husband and our 6 unschooled kids, but living in a nice house with nice cars with easy to cook food in economic and physical comfort is a close second. And the 30-40 hours a week I’m away from my kid where she gets to be cared for by trained educators is what makes that possible.
If working is a necessity, is a less bad job a possibility? If you don’t want to be away from your kids it’s not going to bring you joy to work at all, but at least you don’t have to actively hate the time you spend away from them
Of course I’d rather go live in the woods and raise chickens with my husband and our 6 unschooled kids, but living in a nice house with nice cars with easy to cook food in economic and physical comfort is a close second. And the 30-40 hours a week I’m away from my kid where she gets to be cared for by trained educators is what makes that possible.
If working is a necessity, is a less bad job a possibility? If you don’t want to be away from your kids it’s not going to bring you joy to work at all, but at least you don’t have to actively hate the time you spend away from them
mormonmartini
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zantetsuken
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@liz555 I hate working right now but it’s because of my management. I daydream about quitting all the time. I stay because I work from home and if I were to find another work from home job it would be a huge paycut, and I already took a paycut to work from home. My last job I loved and never thought about quitting, but unfortunately they lost the bid for the contract renewal and a new company took over. But if my partner got a huge raise, if I got some sort of inheritance or other windfall, I would quit. I do still work as a consultant for my old job but it’s not full time, so I would keep doing that because I really love the company.
@liz555 I liked working, but as my house became bigger and when my job exceeds 40 hrs/week, then I hate it. When I liked my job, it was because I found the work interesting enough. I work in IT and I usually feel satisfied with my work and have some flexibility in independent work, helping colleagues, or being helped. Maybe you can find something you like better or find new ways to do your job. Or take mental health days. Or something.
But I'm 100% sure my problem with work is that I work at just too many areas of my life. At home: House manager. House cleaner. Cook. Inventory. Childcare. My own personal assistant if I'm lucky. Gardening. Deliveries and chauffeur service. If my house was very small, I think I'd feel a little more balanced. So just mentioning it in case you can find something besides work that is a problem. Maybe you still won't like work but at least you'd have more time wlfor what you like. Can you get takeout more often? Hire someone to clean the house? Send laundry out? I'm not saying work doesn't suck. But if it's only 40 hours a week out of 168 hours, then maybe you can find something else to get more hours back.
But I'm 100% sure my problem with work is that I work at just too many areas of my life. At home: House manager. House cleaner. Cook. Inventory. Childcare. My own personal assistant if I'm lucky. Gardening. Deliveries and chauffeur service. If my house was very small, I think I'd feel a little more balanced. So just mentioning it in case you can find something besides work that is a problem. Maybe you still won't like work but at least you'd have more time wlfor what you like. Can you get takeout more often? Hire someone to clean the house? Send laundry out? I'm not saying work doesn't suck. But if it's only 40 hours a week out of 168 hours, then maybe you can find something else to get more hours back.