@snowtrekker Middle aged grandma here…honey I promise you ain’t gonna care long term about the birth plan gone awry. A safe delivery and healthy baby are the only goals here.
@snowtrekker Oh girl! I was similar- I wanted an active labour & water birth with minimal medication. Instead I got an early induction due to pre-eclampsia- had an unusual reaction to the Pessary and was crying out in pain and as soon as they said I was at 5cm all I responded with was “EPIDURAL!!!” I was in so much pain they didn’t even try talk me in to other options- just offered gas and air to get enough control for me to have the epidural- I was in so much pain I had little control over my movement. Done great for a few hours then infection and kidney failure hit and the epidural didn’t touch that pain at all. It was horrific. Ended up with a spinal in theatre to prepare for emergency c-section as we both go too unwell- but my body decided that once the pain was gone it was just going to shoot him out my vag.
Never had I pain like that. It was not like period pain (which I get bad anyway) it was like being sliced open repeatedly along with projectile vomiting and severe thirst. Never doing that again and while I wanted medication free I’m glad I didn’t rule it out!
@snowtrekker I too wanted to try for an intervention free birth. Then I had to be induced cu of high blood pressure. Then I couldn’t take it. I was in so much pain and crying and nearly blacking out, sweating, dry heaving. I tried the big bath thing and every position I’d read about and it didn’t matter. There’s no prize for not using pain meds. Doing the epidural was hard, they had to talk me through contractions while halfway through inserting it. But after? I had a nap. 8 hours before it was push time, there was no way I could have done that 15 minute push if I had been in pain for 8 hours.
Say it louder for the people at the back. There’s no prize for an intervention free birth.
You’re a strong mother no matter how baby comes into the world.
@snowtrekker I’m so happy you got relief. Tbh I think mommy groups spoil women from becoming informed about these things. I’ve had 4 babies, I’ve had 3 great deliveries that were great because I got an epidural and allowed my body to do what it needed to do. The delivery that was bad was the one where the crunchy cult on Facebook got their claws in me and I wanted an “intervention free birth”, so I kept declining all these things that would help my baby get here and I ended up in surgery.
@snowtrekker I gave birth at 40+3 and mine went down similarly - labored 12 hrs, 30 mins of pushing! First time I was induced and put on pitocin, which I hated.. so this time when I started experiencing contractions on my own I wanted to see how far I could go without an epidural. I tried counter pressure, breathing exercises, etc.. nothing helped! The back pain was SO much worse for me too, super unexpected, and I gave in around 7cm dilated. After that things went so much better.
@snowtrekker No shame in accepting any help at all. With my first birth it was back on back labour and so I ended up asking for an epidural after being adamant I'd never have one. The rest of labour and delivery was so calm for me.
Recently gave birth to my second and once again bloody back on back labour.
Do not know how I managed to cope with the contractions on the way to the hospital plus on getting there I had to wait a bit for an epidural.
The midwife was impressed by the fact that I wasn't screaming even though I was in horrendous pain.
The epidural didn't work on the right side right away. I was numb on my left but could feel the pain in my right
Thankfully after turning me over it started working properly.
Then the rest of the labour went well again
Epidurals are a godsend
@snowtrekker My epidural failed twice and I felt everything. I love hearing stories about how it worked for women though (it gives me hope that mine might work for #2)
@snowtrekker I had an epidural very early on because I was induced, but towards the end when it was time to push and I was begging to be checked I kept telling my husband it felt like my hip was being slammed with a large rock and I legit thought that my hip was breaking. It was so so painful that I threw up. It is no joke. Thank you for sharing and congratulations!
@snowtrekker congrats on your new baby!! this is quite realistic - we all have preferences but we do not know how we are going to feel or behave once labour actually starts
@snowtrekker Hugs! This brings back memories of my 1st labor. Tried to go unmedicated for 20 hours making it only to 6cm before I tapped out. My baby was malpositioned. Sometimes the card deck is not stacked in your favor. Like you, from the onset of contractions it was “can’t walk” pain and just constant. There was no breaks in between contractions and it felt like a vice grip on my pelvis in between the peaks of contractions. The epidural saved me and I truly believe it helped me have a vaginal delivery.
@snowtrekker I feel you so hard on this. I had a crazy 40+ hours of labor only to find that my epidural wasn't working properly due to my scoliosis. They redid it, and nothing changed. My belly was numb, but I felt pretty much everything else the nurses didn't believe me, kept telling me I wasn't feeling pain, I was just feeling pressure. OH WOW I GUESS I DON'T KNOW THE DIFFERENCE then they bullied me into breaking my water which I DEF FUCKING FELT and was screaming in pain when she dug up there, and this random attending obgyn was laughing at me calling me dramatic. Will never go back to that hospital.
@snowtrekker Similar story.. I basically noticed that no matter how much I tried to breathe through and not tense my body.. the pain, anticipation of it, endlessness of it.. just makes your body clench up I think. Epidural helped me relax and progressed my labor so quickly!
But yeah getting the epidural was so irritating and took 40 min :/
@snowtrekker I had back labor too and also found that movement made it so much worse. All I could do was freeze on my back. I was not able to receive the epidural, so I had to just power through. But I agree - the contractions, I felt, were manageable but the back labor was what really turned it into a horror show lol
@snowtrekker Yep. The contractions were bad, but somehow manageable so I held off on any pain relief. Then I got back labor during transition and I remember begging for help and yelling at my husband that it felt like someone was breaking every bone in my back, one at a time. It’s excruciating.
@snowtrekker Look at you for changing your mind when it mattered to have the best outcome for you and your baby!! Good job!! I also want an intervention-free birth but I’m open to that idea changing as situations arise. I think pregnancy as a whole is a really humbling experience, and we can get in our own way sometimes by not “going with the flow” and being flexible which is a lesson I’m still learning every day!! I guess it’s preparing us for motherhood.
Amazing job & I’m thankful to hear positive experiences from someone who got a couple interventions. Congrats!!
@snowtrekker Congrats on your little babe! I went in with the same mindset! I wanted to have an unmedicated birth. I have a really high pain tolerance and also have really bad menstrual cramps. I was CONVINCED I was good to go! Man, I was sooooo not prepared! My contractions came quick and really never let up once they started! It was way more uncomfortable and in pain than I could’ve ever imagined! I suddenly was all about that epidural life!
Like you, I feel so positive about that decision! With my epidural, I was able to be present in my girly’s birth! I don’t think I would’ve been able to be so happy with my labor and delivery if I hadn’t of had my epidural! I ended up having post birth hemorrhaging which created some extra coordinated chaos ( my doctor and nurses were amazing)! I think going through that would’ve been even more difficult if I had gone unmedicated!
Everyone has their own journey and opinions, but your journey resonated with me!
the nurses didn't believe me, kept telling me I wasn't feeling pain, I was just feeling pressure. OH WOW I GUESS I DON'T KNOW THE DIFFERENCE 
then they bullied me into breaking my water which I DEF FUCKING FELT and was screaming in pain when she dug up there, and this random attending obgyn was laughing at me calling me dramatic. Will never go back to that hospital.
I went in with the same mindset! I wanted to have an unmedicated birth. I have a really high pain tolerance and also have really bad menstrual cramps. I was CONVINCED I was good to go! Man, I was sooooo not prepared! My contractions came quick and really never let up once they started! It was way more uncomfortable and in pain than I could’ve ever imagined! I suddenly was all about that epidural life!