@johnerica As a single widowed mother of four children. People love to say that you’ll find some great phantom person who will love you and your child(ren), or that if that isn’t the case, that someone platonic will step up to fill the paternal role.
That’s all idealistic stuff. It’s been nearly five years and basically nobody gives a crap that my kids have absolutely no paternal figure and want one. Including relatives, friends, friends’ husbands, people from church and their schools etc. Nobody wants to be any type of consistent paternal role to them. Finding men to form platonic relationships with so they can basically semi father your child without romantic involvement with you is an extremely rare thing. Yet it’s a thing people love to suggest. I know of widowed mothers who find great guys yes-but they marry them. And even that, those stories seem to always be other women. It’s never come even remotely close to happening for me, and I’d be totally open to remarriage of someone were a right fit and safe, legitimate, etc.
My kids have basically settled into a disappointed realization they’re gonna grow up fatherless and nobody is willing to fill that void. It’s worn on my mental health so bad. This life sucks.
