When do babies get easier?

M

molitor

New member
I have a 4 month old and we are obsessed with him but it’s been such a rollercoaster. He was very fussy 6-8 weeks and things definitely got way easier at 3 months. Now at 4 months, he’s kind of constantly fussy again.

I feel lucky he’s sleeping through the night but he fights naps and l have anxiety bringing him places bc half the time he’s a joy and the other half he’s having a meltdown haha I feel like half my day is trying to get him to nap and/or calm him. When does it get easier?!
 
@molitor 6 months. My partner and I keep saying we just love this age. He’s sleeping through the night now. That definitely helps. But our routine is set. He is so happy now. It does get better.
 
@dennisabram I would agree with this. It started getting better around 6 months. And i saw the biggest difference at 9 months. It's like once my guy started getting around and sleeping through the night, he turned into a different baby - a much more pleasant baby.
 
@dennisabram Not OP, what helped you get there? Both husband and I are depressed because everything feels and seems terrible.

I mean I got super excited because he rolled over back to front to back today.
 
@dennisabram No, not sure I have the stomach for it. Plus both me and my husband are not working so we take shifts.

Ironically he goes down independently at night, hasn’t stopped the night wakes.
 
@joyfulboy Fair! We started with pick up put down method. Very involved and gentle. Worked well but faded in effectiveness. He was still waking 2-3 times for feeds. I had surgery recently and so we just decided to night wean cold turkey. Took one night of crying for one hour (daddy went in, comforted) and then a half hour a bit later. After that it’s been great! He wakes early and sometimes cries for 10 mins but puts himself back to sleep. I realized he was habit feeding more than needing it.
 
@dennisabram Thanks for sharing your experience, I’m glad it worked for you. My LO already puts himself to sleep independently at night, which is supposedly key for reducing night wakes. However since this doesn’t happen (he wakes and cries every 25-35 minutes, maybe 1 hour if I’ve fed him which is at 1 AM and 4 AM) I’m not sure if I trust the rest of the sleep training rhetoric.

TBH I’m not sure if I could even handle 10 minutes of crying, since my son tends to ramp up to screaming soooo fast. Hoping that time and development will improve his sleep eventually.
 
@joyfulboy I hear you! Our boy was waking every hour and half for a few months. It felt like hell. I never thought I’d be okay with him crying but I’m glad we go through it so he could sleep better. But it’s soooo hard!! And every kid is so different. Hope you all get some good sleep soon! Hugs
 
@joyfulboy Similar experience for me! He could always put himself to sleep but would wake up every hour until recently. I let him cry it out for three nights (which resulted in a couple 30 min cries throughout the night and eventually he figured out how to self soothe) and then by night 4 he was sleeping 11 hours!
 
@molitor It comes in stages, at least for me — who is -profoundly- not a baby person.

6 months — you get to (generally) start solids, this takes away some of the fussiness and sleeplessness that you get at four and five months when they start moving more and getting hungrier. You get a routine, and some predictability which is then immediately ruined by teething.

9 months - generally regarded as the golden age of having babies. They start to get fun, you start to see a personality, they start to move but aren’t -too- mobile. You’re through any sleeplessness from first teeth at 6 months and they’re better at eating so anxiety around that starts to fade. Most babies are on two naps so you’re tethered to your home less.

12 months - they start to communicate. Whether with receptive or expressive language, words or signs, it becomes less of a guessing game. Moving toward dropping to one nap, you’re starting to minimize the last three months of head bonks as they found their balance. If you’re bottle feeding, you get to stop.
 
@britdanielle92 This is a great summary! Although the downside of 9 months is separation anxiety, which for us caused a reversal in his ability to fall asleep independently with minimal fussing. He can still go down but not without 10-20 seconds of LOUD wailing/standing up in crib and it breaks my heart. And he’s not easy to rock to sleep anymore - lots of fidgeting
 
@molitor 4 months is a notoriously grumpy time. My girl was miserable for 3 weeks, and like a switch she woke up from a nap happy and she hasn’t had one of those terrible purple cry meltdowns since (6m old now). (Also you didn’t ask, but fighting naps could mean they are ready to drop a nap? Just a suggestion)
 
@jun_za I’m not sure how to drop a nap while adhering to 90-120 min wake windows! Any advice? He eats at 6am, 9am, 12pm, 3pm, 6pm and basically naps after each feeding (with an activity before the nap)
 
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