@catholic2001 I also pushed for two hours with my first, but I had inductions/epidurals with all three and 2 and 3 both only took 15 minutes of pushing - so just offering some encouragement if you do end up getting an epidural again pushing might still be a lot faster since your body knows what it’s doing now. I had a what my obgyn called a “very normal 2nd degree tear” with my first and no tearing with my other two.
@catholic2001 Both of mine were unmedicated! The first was long and terrible but I did it. Second time the baby practically flew out of me. All I did differently was relaxing my pelvic floor and hypnobirthing. I truly think relaxing like that is what made it so fast. I went from an 18 hour first time with 5 hours of pushing to a precipitous 3 hour labor. Literally delivered him in the lobby. Second babies come quicker!
@catholic2001 Reframe the pain as a positive thing.. that it’s getting you closer to meeting your baby.
Visualize each contraction as a wave… ride the wave and it will dissipate and you can rest again.
The last thing that helped immensely and helped me push was investing and committing to a prenatal workout program til the very end. I did Fittest Core’s and omg it helped so much. A lot of delivery and labor prep packed into each workout.
@catholic2001 I used a tens machine throughout labor that’s all I did other than following my doula’s guidance in breathing and surrendering to the contractions. It worked for me! I’d say the pain and discomfort was definitely unpleasant but in retrospect really not as horrible as I’d imagined, like I’d definitely do it again!
@catholic2001 I knew my preference was unmedicated birth but was on the same train of thought as you regarding being flexible and prioritizing safety. My midwife and doula told me to stay at home as long as possible to minimize intervention once labor started. I labored at home for about 12 hours (standing up in the shower minimized the pain for me and got me into a chill state), transitioned in the car, and arrived 8 cm dilated. Babe was born with no epidural but they did have me use the gas because I could not do the cervical check (this was the only one of my pregnancy, lol, just not into them like most people).
What worked for me was educating myself about every step of the process, having a prenatal therapist, and going to the chiropractor/prenatal massage. I had near debilitating anxiety about my rainbow baby (got pregnant 6 weeks after my miscarriage) and taking care of myself mentally and physically, while spending time around birth educators who really care about empowering women, made me ready to take on birth without getting stuck in the fear-pain cycle.
@catholic2001 2, unmedicated births here. Well sort of, with the first I had a cervix softener because my water had broken. Mindset - I had my eye on the prize. And I kept reminding myself I had to push through, I literally could not quit on giving birth. I had a song for my second that I’d put my headphones on at the beginning of every contraction and it was a life saver. Seven Nation Army by The White Stripes. I have no idea why, it’s not even my favorite song or band, but the beat got me through. Also my doc told me to “bear down” basically act like I was pooping, during contractions for my second birth and it really helped. I also squeezed my partners hand and counter pressure was great, too. Good luck, you’ll do great whatever happens, just take it minute by minute and know that whatever you need to do is the right thing for you and your baby.
@catholic2001 I’ve had both experiences and I would never intentionally have an unmedicated birth in my life. I would rather drink a gallon of yellow mustard, hiccups forever, I don’t know - think of anything miserable and I’d prefer it to unmedicated delivery.
It wasn’t so much the labor as it was the actual delivery. I seriously thought I was going to die from the pain as my daughter was crowning and that’s not an exaggeration, I typically have a very high tolerance for pain. My husband was terrified to have another kid because of how brutal it was.
My son was already born BEFORE I was warning the nurses that I might scream once we were “getting closer”. I couldn’t believe that it was so manageable. Felt like I cheated after how gruesome my first delivery was.
The delivery was less traumatic, recovery was also easier and that’s helped me feel like myself much more quickly. I would 100% get the epidural every time, no questions asked.
@catholic2001 Hi! I just had my son a month ago. We planned a homebirth with a certified nurse midwife and ended up transferring to the hospital after 36 hours of labor. I used hypnobirthing and it was awesome. The 36 hours of unmedicated labor at home certainly wasn’t agonizing and I was able to stay on top of the discomfort until the very end. We transferred because I got exhausted and needed the epidural to sleep. Labor only got challenging for me at the end when I was so exhausted and couldn’t keep my mind calm anymore. When we got to the hospital I got my epidural and then slept for several hours and then immediately had my baby haha. I also used my hypnobabies techniques to help me stay calm during the transfer and in the hospital overnight and postpartum. I can’t recommend hypnobabies highly enough. It’s a bit woo woo at times but the technique itself is excellent.
@catholic2001 I did hypnobirthing. I ended up getting an epidural around 8 cm also. For me it wasn't the pain - I was still at the point where I was experiencing things as "a lot of sensation" but not pain, but I HATED going to the bathroom and also I desperately needed to sleep. I also had an induction and a doula.
I find it interesting what helps various people - lots of people say they were helped by moving, but I was definitely helped by staying still. Moving broke my zen headspace. It was part of the reason I ended up getting the epidural - I figured if all I was going to do was sit anyway, I might as well be able to sleep.
@catholic2001 I know you’ve seen over a hundred comments by now, but I hope you see this one. For my first, among many other things listed here, I listened to the audiobook version of the book Mindful Birthing. It was transformative in some of the ideas and ways it got me thinking about birth. For my second (much faster, much “easier…ha” labor) I listened to it again. Still love it. Still think of that book fondly.
Additionally, I’d recommend hypnobirthing over hypnobabies (which felt so damn commercial and cult-y) as well as music and movement during labor. I basically didn’t stop moving. Final tip that my birth educator suggested to me—try to empty your bladder every hour or so.
My second labor was over in less than half the time of my first and so, so much more manageable. The hardest part for me both times was pushing, but i also have babies with shockingly large heads.
