I '18/F' need urgent help with birth control

@sisterkat Considering the condom looked empty, you would have felt it when you stood up. When you have unprotected sex and they come in you, their come literally drips back down (out of your vagina lol), so you’ll actually feel and see it. Do you remember if you felt it? Otherwise he most likely lied about coming and that’s why he’s so confident about not buying you plan B.
 
@offor i did feel a little weirdness after sex like inside. i asked for a wet wipe to see further more if he finished it kind of looked like he did but not much came out sorry if this is so tmi. the condom had what looked like residue semen within it but it wasn’t a lot. when i asked for a closer look he grabbed it and threw it away. i did take into consideration that he either finished or lied about finishing. but his reaction to me confronting him and questioning him was super dismissive and he almost seemed happy i don’t really know how to explain it. but based off his reaction to get a plan b and then yelling at me while i was crying it just felt like he wants to trap me i don’t know but i will never be seeing him again
 
@sisterkat Girl I’m all for tmi’s, it doesn’t bother me. When you wipe (even with protected sex), if you were wet (not exactly coming), then it will look like come on the wipe. However, usually a guys come is easier to distinguish. It’s thicker. Also guys also let out less cum if they jerk off or have sex really often. Now what I’m wondering is if he didn’t want you to look because 1. There was a hole 2. He came so little and was embarrassed about you seeing it 3. He lied about coming 4. He came too fast. I remember I hooked up with this guy once and he suddenly stopped like a minute in, and he looked so embarrassed/worried that I thought the condom had broken. I was confused because I asked if it had broken and he wouldn’t answer or given me an explanation. He also wouldn’t show me the condom. Turns out he was just embarrassed about coming really fast lol.
In terms of this guy dismissing you, it could also be because he sees the power dynamic and views you as over dramatic. Could be happy because he had sex with someone much younger, like a kink. Whether he came or not. He’s disgusting, glad you’re not seeing him anymore. Best of luck !
 
Also weird how? Like pain from intercourse? Wetter? Subtle pain but not from intercourse just like… a weird feeling? Idk how to explain it…like your stomach or uterus feels weird? (Don’t confuse it with nervousness though)
 
@offor i didn’t have pain but i’d say after sex i felt weird in a way where i felt like he finished inside me. when i checked it looked like semen. i didn’t finish which is why i was panicked and immediately confronted him
 
@sisterkat Man it’s hard to know. Did you physically feel like he finished in you or did you feel suspicious about it because you were paranoid he had? I usually can’t (physically) tell if my bf came, only way I feel it is when I stand or sit up. Or if it’s gushing out lol. Ik tmi. But I also know that during the times he didn’t come, and neither did I, I was still wet (like a watery discharge) from the intercourse.
 
@offor i physically felt like he finished in me and then when i asked if he did and got his response of gaslighting, being dismissive, and angry towards me it all set into me that he likely did it trying to trap me. once i stood up it felt like gushing which i wiped and seen what looked like semen but it wasn’t a lot. i remember the first time i lost it of course i was in pain after sex and we wore protection but i never felt like there was cum in me
 
@sisterkat Yeah no I’d def go for the plan B, that def sounds like he might’ve done it. Especially with his reaction. Whether it happened or not, better to be safe so glad you’re being really smart about it! Proud of you:)
 
@offor i was wet but i didn’t finish unfortunately what a useless man lol. when i wiped it was thick and appeared to be his cum. there wasn’t a lot of it. i tried to pass it off as the lube from the condom we used but i am pretty sure that it would’ve been clear. i don’t have much sexual experience i’ve only had sex once prior to seeing him but i didn’t want him to know that because i felt there were already aspects of him taking advantage of my vulnerability. i have revised the situation a little more better now and his character but i am thinking most likely he didn’t want me to look because there was either a hole and maybe he had came a little bit but some had gotten in me . we’ve only had sex twice together and the first time he immediately took the condom off and threw it away. this time he was hesitant to take it off and throw it away in front of me and kinda put it away so maybe he could’ve been embarrassed but just the way he was acting it set me off. i’ve done a little research of the women he’s had kids with and the second mother to his son is 21 and his son is 4… meaning she had him at 18 my age. this is messing with me so much right now i refuse to let teen pregnancy get me!
 
@sisterkat Oh god. Yeah that’s very suspicious behavior. And the fact that the girl was 18 when she got pregnant?? I’d be very cautious as well. Def try to ask around for money for birth control !! I would hate for you to not only get pregnant unintentionally (and with the wrong guy) this young, but with a guy like him.
 
@offor super super suspicious behaviour! you’re so right. i refuse to let teen pregnancy get to me and i don’t want that to sound like im bashing the mother of his son because she likely went through what im going through right now but his character,personality and appearance is not someone i want to have children with. someone has offered to get me a plan b so amen!
 
@offor i am contemplating reaching out but i’m also just contemplating leaving this all behind me for my mental because i don’t wanna indulge with anything to do with him anymore. i’m super interested in getting in contact with her to learn her story i feel like she’d have a lot to say about him cause he’s not the best now that i know
 
@sisterkat You won’t be protected from pregnancy if you start the pill now, I’m sorry. It needs 7 days to work, and the tracking apps mean nothing. It’s possible to get pregnant anywhere in your cycle unless you are extremely educated about cycle tracking.

Please go and get emergency contraception, and book an appointment for an STI test. Your age difference and his actions tells me he’s taking advantage of you. Do not speak to that man again. And if you believe he broke the condom intentionally, take the matter to the police. It is sexual assault.

If you’re going to be having sex with anyone, I recommend giving the pill a try. It does not have bad side effects for everyone, and you won’t know until you try.
 
@sk8rkid831 firstly thank you so much for your response it means a lot. i am pulling some money together to buy a plan b. i will also be booking an appointment for an sti test. i have cut contact with him on the relationship aspect because its clear he doesn’t value me. i have contacted him to see if he will send me money for a plan b. i will start the pill after i get my hands on a plan b because reasonably this is very stressful and i never want this to happen again
 
@sisterkat You need to get plan b or an emergency contraceptive. Theres one for $40. Can he send you some money?
You can also go to planned parenthood tomorrow and ask for plan b/tell them the scenario you’re in and state you have no income.
 
@cypress88 when i asked if he could take me to the store to get plan b he refused and then eventually took me and told me to get out the car and get it myself. i couldn’t go inside because i was crying and visibly distraught. i will text and ask if he can send money but i am currently looking into planned parenthood in ontario
 
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