@soni80 That’s actually so impressive. I remember when I was a kid a similar incident happened at a slumber party and I used it as back mail for years (which was terrible) this actually made me feel as though there’s actually some good parents left out there raising good kiddos
@rebeccazoly I hope you’re not hard on yourself about it - it’s not easy being a kid and navigating situations like these. Thanks for your comment, I hope L keeps practicing kindness like this.
@soni80 I could already tell from your post, but this comment made me have to tell you this- you seem like a truly compassionate person and it shows you are raising your daughter to be too. You are a great mom!
@soni80 This depends how much the blackmailed kid felt. Bullies don’t get a pass because “being a kid is hard” Fuck that kind of bullshit thinking, it’s the same as “boys will be boys” and “kids will be kids”. Bullying like that is harsh and causes lifelong problems.
There are instances of this type of stuff and it follows the kid from grade school to high school
and that kid never had a normal childhood because some other kid makes sure they’re always remembered as “that kid”. They never have and friends, theyre depressed for fucking 8+ years and some kill themselves.
So, “hope youre not too hard on yourself” isn’t a good response.
@_marc97 You're right, bullies don't get a pass cause "being a kid is hard". But people who have grown and feel remorse for their past actions and hold themselves to a high standard now are different than bullies.
The tone of this person's response indicates that they feel bad about their actions in the past, and acknowledges that they were wrong. So yes, I responded saying I hope they're not too hard on themselves. They can't fix it now, and ruminating on it doesn't help. What DOES help is not repeating that behavior and being actively kind.
@soni80 Honestly the way you both acted is amazing! I was at a 5 year old's birthday party and they had outdoor games. A friend of mine's 9 year old had an accident and her mother ( not my friend) proceeded to shame her in front of everyone and was just absolutely furious. People forget how little kids are... 9 years on this planet is such a short time still. Im really proud of both of you.
@healing212 Ugh. That really sucks, makes me cringe just reading it. You’re right, 9 years isn’t long at all, and we’re all human... everybody poops. No sense in shaming an accident.
@healing212 That makes me so sad. That's why they are called accidents, I would like to say that nobody intentionally does that, but then someone would probably show up saying "weeellll, akshually, there ARE."
Anyway, OP, your house sounds like the kind that I would be overjoyed to have mine spend time at.
@phouglas Thanks, that's what makes me happy. I rarely had people over when I was a kid, and so I want my house to be one where everyone feels at home.
@soni80 So sweet. My 9 year old's best friend still wets the bed. He is such a good kid and has a lot of friends but doesn't do sleepovers because he's afraid other kids will find out. He used to wear Goodnites but now when he sleeps over I wake him up in the middle of the night like his mom does. I'm close friends with the mom so I don't mind. Even with that he still has accidents sometimes. He has told my son that he only sleeps over here because he knows my son won't tell anyone or tease him.
@katrina2017 Awwww that’s awesome!! That’s what I want too - my kids friends to feel like this is their home too. I’m glad our kids make their friends feel safe.
@soni80 As a fully incontinent individual (although I wasn't as a child) who has had visible accidents in the past, and will again in the future (I wear adult diapers, but leaks happen, diapers fail, etc), I can only hope that anyone who notices that I've had an accident treats me with as much dignity and respect as your daughter did her friend.