Super proud of my little human tonight

@soni80 Your daughter sounds incredible. Well done, Momma.

Her friends reaction, insisting on cleaning it herself, makes me think this has happened before. She’s probably gotten in trouble for it and made to clean it herself. If it is a pattern it is clearly something that needs to be looked into. If the parents reaction is to get angry and she’s scared she may be hiding just how often it happens. I suggest gently asking her parents if she’s had stomach issues or close calls before, still keeping it to yourself and not potentially getting her into trouble, and suggesting they talk to her pediatrician.
 
@spekgirl honestly, i think you’re reading way too much into this.

the little girl had an accident. she insisted on cleaning up herself, the most realistic reason is because she didn’t want to be seen as a baby that needs help being cleaned up.
 
@evamom Yeah my 5 year old has cleaned up her messes since day one. Not cause I can’t or won’t, but she knows it was her accident and she knows it’s her responsibility. She has no guilt or shame (currently). It usually goes mom so peed/pooped myself. Do you need help? No. Where is it? (So I can fully clean and disinfect when she’s done. As much as apple cider vinegar cleans.. I’d rather use stronger chemicals on accidents lol)

Can I draw you a shower hun? I’m sorry that happened. Me too.
 
@spekgirl Thank you! I appreciate your concern! But yeah, I think you may be overreaching a bit. Her parents are lovely people. I think she was just really really really embarrassed and wanted to take care of it herself as much as possible.
 
@soni80 A 9 year old pooping her pants isn't normal. There are a number of conditions that can cause this symptom, but it needs to be addressed by a doctor.

It's great how you and your daughter handled it with her friend, but I suggest sitting down with her and explaining that though it isn't her fault, you do need to tell her parents so they can get her to the doctor for a checkup.

https://kidshealth.org/en/parents/encopresis.html

This goes over some of the reasons and treatments. She needs to see a doctor asap to start addressing the condition and being treated for it so she doesn't have lasting physical and/or psychological issues from this.
 
@soni80 May not be the condition that the OC thought, but it very well may be something medical. Since this situation went so well, it’s possible the OP could gingerly talk with N about it and let her know that if it’s happened more than once, a doctor could help make it go away. OP needs to find a way to tell Ns parents. And yup! L did OP proud!!
 

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