Reaffirms OAD to me

A

artzmel11

New member
Today in the office I overheard a lady who is due in 2 months with #3 (a girl) saying how rough it was when her 2 boys who constantly bickered and fought while being unwell (3.5 and 20 months) were off sick for 2 weeks while her husband was off on a trip, and her parents are away enjoying themselves in Europe.
She's gonna have 3 under 4 and clearly is just going for it to get the babies out of the way - but after having our DD home for a week with HFMD from day care - I am plenty happy to not have that chaos under my roof EVER. I realise some people dreamt of a bigger family and may not be OAD by choice - but my goodness by choice is the way to go when I heard this lady woo is me all through the day. P.S. LOVE this sub and everyones honesty and supportive comments - has been my staple and my wife has come to realise we are a complete family and all my positive vibes have come from this sub. We have booked a family trip just the 3 of us in November and cant wait!
 
@artzmel11 Agree with you. I live in a community where a lot of people have at least 4 kids. I can tell you a lot of these families are not happy, especially the moms. They can't even go anywhere because they can't fit everyone in one car. The dads don't help out much. A couple of kids could definitely use some early childhood intervention or maybe a social welfare check. I hate how these moms don't get much support or a choice. Compared to our little triangle family, it's like night and day.
 
@artzmel11 My favorite part about being a family of three is the vacations…you get a row of three seats on the airplane and don’t have to worry about splitting up! We have taken way more trips as a family of three than we would have with more kids. I have empathy for that lady in your story, sounds like she doesn’t have support yikes! Choosing just one child has definitely saved my sanity. Enjoy your vacation in November!
 
@shelray Yes for many years, my child felt like the absolute limit of what I was able to manage but now it’s just fun and we go all over the place.
 
@shelray "Choosing one child has definitely saved my sanity" - I relate to this so much! My husband is an only and always thought he would have one, and I have a sibling and just always thought I'd have two, so we decided at least one and we'll see what happens. It felt like as soon as our child arrived we were a complete family and I love our little family of 3 so much. Every time we get past a difficult stage I think to myself how happy I am we won't have to go through that particular stage again, or have that stage in another child detract from the fun of our older child. We can just grow together the three of us and enjoy as much of it as we can. So happy about our choice!
 
@artzmel11 I was just talking to a mom yesterday with the same ages 3.5, 18 mo, baby due in a month. She legitimately said to me “I feel so bad for (18mo) because they’re forgotten or shuffled around so much!” I couldn’t believe it. I felt so awful for her child.

Traveling as a family of 3 is so easy and mostly fun. Though it is just parenting in a different place but seeing the experience through your child’s eyes is like no other.
 
@clndr_ thanks for that :) While OAD is not better than anyone else - I do have to question people intentionally having large families when they struggle with the 1,2,x they already have!
 
@artzmel11 Had to check the user name to see if it was my other half who wrote this post! Had a very similar conversation the other day, and we also have a family trip booked for the 3 of us in November 🙂
 
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